Okay or Not Okay is Okay

Nobody can tell you how to be.Photo by Raphael Renter | @raphi_rawr on Unsplash

Life in 2025 can be thoroughly exhausting.

Spend any time at all reading or watching the news, talking to people about current events, and the ongoing assault on basic human decency, and it hits you. The dread, the uncertainty, the disquiet, the unease, and the fear are mind-numbing.

For some people, all of this is a distant, far-off abstract. It’s so far enough removed from you and your life that little of what’s happening and being done directly impacts you on a day-to-day basis. For some people, this is closer to their reality, as they’re only a few steps removed from seeing people being impacted by this madness. Then, of course, some people are being hurt by what’s going on, stripped of rights, wrongfully imprisoned, and worse.

When you’re part of the first category, far removed, it’s easy to feel something and not give a shit at the same time. Unfortunately, surreal messages are being broadcast to tell people that caring, kindness, compassion, and empathy make people weak. That has lots of people not giving a shit. At least, not until they find themselves in the second or third circumstance. For those who do care, even at a far-removed distance, the limitations of what you can do can be frustrating, infuriating, and/or terrifying.

When all is said and done, you can only look out for your own mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical being. This is not a selfish thing; it’s reality. An important aspect of this is recognizing it’s okay to not be okay. But it’s also okay to be okay.

You alone know yourself

Over the past few decades, I’ve watched the narrative take some very weird turns. Not so long ago, the collective consciousness was a lot more hopeful. Then, between runaway consumerism, a focus on corporate welfare over human welfare, and the media caring only about what turns their parent company a profit, we’re in a very different place today.

It’s all too easy to get caught up in the hype, the utterly bullshit fear of missing out (FOMO), undue power of so-called influencers, and various other messages of lack, scarcity, and insufficiency. When that happens, you find yourself lost and unaware of yourself.

I know people who barely know their own minds. They’re so caught up in what others think about them, the impression they’re making, and what they do and don’t have that they lose sight of themselves.

Nobody else can be in your head, heart, or soul. Ergo, nobody but you can think your thoughts, feel your feelings, know what your intentions are, choose if your approach is positive or negative, and what you do or don’t do. I can’t tell you what makes you content, what brings you joy, or anything else because I’m not you.

You alone know yourself. But you’re discouraged from looking too closely at that. Why? Because when you do, you become empowered. When you’re empowered, you need “them” less or not at all. And by them, I mean politicians, influencers, so-called gurus, demagogues, and so on.

One way to begin to take back self-knowledge is by gauging your thoughts and feelings.

Photo by Ian Taylor on UnsplashAm I okay or not okay?

Okay is an incredibly neutral term when you get right down to it. It can fall directly between well and unwell, good and bad, happy and sad, and so on. It’s a word that can also be sarcastic, understated, or a cop-out.

Since contentment is a much more realistic place for people to be than happiness, okay is a working analog for this idea. I’m not bad, I’m not great, but I am okay. What the definition of okay is will be a personal matter of context.

It can also be an excellent place of balance and centering to start from when you’re inundated by uncertainty, discontent, fear, anger, and the stressful madness of the times.

How do you determine if you’re okay or not okay? Active conscious awareness – i.e., mindfulness.

The best starting point for this is your thoughts and feelings. To know what they are, right here and now, all you need to do is put your attention in this moment, be completely present here and now, and ask,

What am I thinking?What am I feeling?How am I feeling?

All of these can only be genuinely answered at this moment. When you get the answer, you can decide if you like it or not, and then take action to change the answer.

If you’re thinking about terrible things, feeling lost and miserable, it’s not a logical, reasonable, or easy jump to get to the opposites of these. Instead, it’s much more realistic to get to okay or not okay.

There’s no right or wrong answer

You’re the only one who is in your head, heart, and soul. You alone know your thoughts, feelings, intentions, approach, and actions. When all is said and done, you can work to be okay, but you might find that you’re not okay. And that is also okay.

Given the draining nature of far too much of the world today, it’s okay for you to not be okay. But it’s also okay to be okay. Either way, you can employ active conscious awareness to be who, what, where, how, and why you desire to be.

Just remember that you aren’t an island unto yourself. The entire human race is interconnected, even when we disagree. But no matter how direct or indirect the impact of world affairs might be on you, when you choose to recognize if you’re okay or not okay, you empower yourself. That empowerment is a first step in being able to be a beacon of light and hope to others. Every little bit – no matter how seemingly insignificant – counts.

Okay or not okay is okay.

Recognizing that okay or not okay is okay isn’t hard

It’s all about practicing active conscious awareness of your thoughts, feelings, intentions, and approach to direct your actions.

When you recognize and acknowledge that you alone can know and control your thoughts, feelings, intentions, approach, and actions, you become empowered to find balance and be okay or not okay. Knowing that it’s okay to not be okay or okay, you can make active, consciously aware choices and decisions to work with yourself and the world around you, no matter what your circumstances might currently be.

This empowers you, and your empowerment can empower others around you.

Consciously choosing your approach to life towards positivity or negativity – from the vast cylinder that exists between them – shifts life in a way that opens greater dialogue. From that broader dialogue, you can recognize, explore, and share where you are between the extremes and how that impacts you here and now.

Choosing thoughts, feelings, actions, and intentions for yourself employs an approach and attitude of positivity for realizing amazing potential and possibilities for your life.

The better aware you are of yourself here and now, the better you can choose and decide what, how, and why your life experiences will be. When you empower yourself, that can spread to those around you for their empowerment.

Thank you for coming along on this journey.

This is the five-hundred-and-ninety-fourth (594) entry of my Positivity series. I hope that these weekly messages might help spread positive energies for everyone. Feel free to share, reblog, and spread the positivity.

Please visit here to explore all my published fiction and non-fiction.

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