When You Feel Everything: Hormonal Fluctuations and the Emotional Side of Parenting

“It’s just spilled tea, Mama. It’s okay.”

His tiny voice cracked through my frustration like a sliver of sunlight through storm clouds.

I had just raised my voice at my son for knocking over a cup of tea. A harmless accident. But at that moment, I felt like the world was closing in. I was exhausted, irritated, and teary-eyed—over tea.

It wasn’t just the mess. It wasn’t even about him.

It was my body’s quiet rebellion—hormonal fluctuations pulling the emotional strings behind the curtain.

The Invisible Storm We Don’t Talk About Enough

As women—especially mothers, caregivers, and educators—we’re expected to be calm, consistent, and emotionally available at all times. But what about the days when your mind is foggy, your patience is threadbare, and your emotions feel like they’re on a rollercoaster you didn’t sign up for?

Hormonal shifts—whether due to your monthly cycle, postpartum changes, perimenopause, or stress—can drastically affect:

Emotional regulationSensory sensitivityFatigue levelsYour ability to cope with everyday parenting demands

And here’s where it gets even more complex: Neurodiverse children are emotional sponges.

They don’t just hear our words.

They feel our tone, our body language, our silence, our sighs.

The Co-Regulation Loop We Forget We’re In

Children, especially those with ADHD, sensory processing differences, or emotional regulation challenges, learn to self-regulate by borrowing from us. They rely on our nervous systems to anchor theirs.

But what happens when we’re off-balance due to our own internal shifts?

They may become more reactive.

Transitions feel harder.

Meltdowns come faster.

Instructions bounce off them like rubber balls.

It’s not misbehaviour.

It’s their body reacting to our unspoken cues.

What Can You Do On the Hard Days?

We can’t prevent hormonal fluctuations—nor should we feel ashamed of them.

But we can work with them, not against them.

Here are a few gentle strategies that help me (and my son) weather the emotional weather:

1. Name It (For Yourself & Your Child)

“I’m feeling a little overwhelmed today, buddy. Not your fault. I’m just moving a bit slower.”

This models emotional honesty and helps your child understand that grown-ups have big feelings, too—and it’s okay to talk about them.

2. Shrink the Day

On those extra-sensitive days, I keep my routines minimal but predictable.

We skip non-essential tasks. I set visual timers for transitions. And we spend more time doing things that feel easy, like puzzles, dancing, or parallel play.

3. Use Scripts for Yourself, Too

Just like we give kids calm scripts like, “Can I have a break?”, try using your own:

“Let me take five deep breaths.”“I’ll come back to this in five minutes.”“Today is a slow-motion day.” 4. Create a “Cozy Corner” for Both of You

Set up a relaxing space with books, headphones, fidget toys, or calming music. When things feel overwhelming, invite your child to sit there with you—even if it’s just for a few deep breaths together.

Try This Activity: Colour Your Mood

Create a simple mood chart using colours and faces (happy, calm, tired, cranky).

Every morning and evening, ask your child to colour how they feel—and you do it, too.

This playful check-in becomes a shared language of emotions, removing shame and building empathy.

Dear Parent, You’re Not “Too Sensitive”—You’re Attuned

Sensitivity isn’t a weakness. It’s awareness.

Hormonal fluctuations don’t make you a bad parent—they make you human.

When you honour your own emotional rhythm, you teach your child the most powerful lesson of all:

Being in tune with yourself is the first step to truly connecting with others.

Need support navigating challenging parenting moments, emotional regulation, or understanding your child’s unique needs?

Book a 1:1 consultation with me here

Let’s find calm together.

Recommended Resources to Support Emotional SensitivitySensory & Calm‑Down Tools Kids Sensory Calm‑Down Tent – A cosy, private space perfect for both children and moms to retreat when emotions swell. Think quiet corner vibes—with soft light and sensory textures—to help both of you reset. Learning Resources Sensory Emotion Bottle – A mesmerizing visual tool. Shake it, watch the glitter swirl, and use it together during moments of deep breathing. A playful, practical way to introduce mindful pauses. hand2mind ‘Express Your Feelings’ Sensory Bottles – A set that comes with emotion prompts. Great for afternoon check-ins—ask your child which bottle matches their mood (and pick one for yourself, too!).

These aren’t just “toys.” They’re co-regulation tools you can use alongside your child to gently model emotional awareness, soothing rituals, and self‑soothing strategies.

Recommended Free Courses“Develop Your Emotional Intelligence” – A beginner-friendly course teaching self-awareness and emotional control—perfect for understanding what’s happening on especially sensitive days.“Achieving Emotional Intelligence” – Teaches pausing before reacting, emotion recognition, and stress management—great tools for both parents and children to co-learn calming techniques.

All these courses are 100% free and include printable activities you can easily use at home with your child to build shared emotional vocabulary and resilience.

How to Use These TogetherStepAction                                                                   1.Choose one small toolkit (such as a tent or bottle) to use regularly.2.Enroll in a course and complete at least one module per week.3.Practice side-by-side—e.g., after a lesson, build a “pause ritual” together: shake the bottle, breathe, and talk about how you feel.

Adding these simple, affordable tools and a bit of emotional intelligence learning can build a stronger emotional bridge between you and your child.

Let me know in the comments if you’d like a sample printable mood chart or a “first-activities” guide to go along with these!

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