My Friend Forever; I Wanted a Real Girlfriend
“Playing music is more than cleverness.” --in the WUNDERKIND Chapter of THE BALLAD OF THE SAD CAFE by Carson McCullers Mary Anne D Parsons of 1339 N Columbus Avenue, Unit 123, Glendale, CA sent me a lovely Birthday Card. We met her at the LAWRY’s PRIME RIB Restaurant, and it became a forever-lasting friendship. I was surprised that Mary Anne remembered by birthday. I was sincerely touched. She is so motherly and caring. Since her husband, Bill, died she’s always seemed so lonely. She keeps holding onto a fantasy crush on Brian, the General Manager at LAWRY’s PRIME RIB. Too bad Brian is married and has no desire for Mary Anne in an intimate sense. He simply has a charm for his frequent guests and Mary Anne is one of them. Alas, it gives her someone to fantasize over during those cold, lonely, hot vibrator nights. I guess we’ll be seeing her for dinner very soon. I think Gloira Weiner-Freiman-Cohen called her today to confirm the date. At least we’ll see her at a non-LAWRY's establishment this time.
Paloma also wrote me a wonderful letter for my 40th birthday. Paloma Sanchez-Guerra Alquier always remembers my birthday. I got this little card and letter from her. She included photos from the CANNES FILM FESTIVAL, but her package arrived all wet. L.A. had a rainy day when it was delivered. In any case, I managed to get the best of all she had to say. Paloma will be My Friend Forever. To think we met at a Halloween Night Club Party in San Francisco back in 1983. I was dressed as a baby, wearing a diaper and she was dressed as a cave girl. We looked VERY HOT, dancing together. Here is her letter: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHAEL,
We did not send you real candy. We thought at your age it’s better to forget about that! Just kidding, as we say in France: “QUI AIME BIEN, CHATIE BIEN” which means something like “WHO LOVES WELL, PUNISHES WELL”. It’s a strange feeling at the beginning to think you’re ‘40’ but then you get used to it fast. What I hate sometimes is to see other people who have got the same age but look way older than me (and old than you, of course). You can tell something is different when you see kids around you getting taller than you are. We wish you a great birthday. Here is a new CITE DE CARCASSONNE postcard which is about one hour from here. It’s a very pretty city. We took my mom there two weeks ago. I know you’ll like some of the songs on the tape I made for you. I’ve tried to find songs you don’t know. That’s why most of them are French. Some of them were big hist lately (not on Side A), and maybe you have heard about “BELLE” since it belongs to a musical comedy called Notre Dame de Paris. It won at the World Music Awards in Monaco. Do you get to see the World Music Awards in the USA? They say they're going to translate all the songs, so they play in the USA. They are in Canada right now, that was the big success story here this year. No. 6 on Side B, OPHELIE WINTER is a huge star over here. She’s made a few movies. She is very pretty and has a great personality. She’s trying to work in the USA, too. I guess that’s why this song (SHAME ON U) is in English also.
Then you’ve got the music from a few movies: DIDIER, a funny movie about a dog who becomes a man. PEDALE DOUCE about two gay women. I already told you about this one. I liked it a lot. Sorry about my mistakes but I’m at work and people keep coming to talk to me and I got mixed up with another movie about two gay women that I liked a lot also called GAZONE MAUDIT (French Twist in English). I think I read somewhere that CHER or DEMI MOORE may be interested in a remake of PEDALE DOUCE. In French, PEDALE refers to a bike and it’s also NOT very friendly term to refer to a homosexual. MICROCOSMOS is also a pretty interesting movie about insects. Maybe you’ve heard about it? And to finish the tape you’ve got a few old songs like the one from Mariah Carey. I like that one. Remember you sent me a video of Mylene Farmer? Yesterday, on TV they were talking about a great chef—in fact, they said the best-in-the-world who has many restaurants in New York, a French guy. I guess you’ve heard about it: “VONG” (Jean-Georges Vongrichten). If you can’t make it to the PRINCE DE GALLES Hotel don’t worry. We’ll go for you.
Photo: Laurent Alquier, the Chef
Did I tell you Alexandre’s brother, Laurent, is now a chef de village at CLUB MED? So, our hopes will be to go somewhere in the world on vacation which is getting closer to reality. He is in Israel right now (in ARVIZ). We are the ones who inspired him to go to work at CLUB MED after all. He’s just been to the one in Florida (SANDPIPER) and in the Bahamas (Paradise Island). What are your brothers doing? I’ve got to send this letter now if you want to get it on time for your birthday. Next time I’ll write you about the CANNES FILM FESTIVAL. Once again, have a great time for your birthday. Hello to Alan! Oh, and I’m fine (I think). Love, Paloma
Ashley printed out a computerized card for me. LOVELY!
Mom sent a cute note on a Pacific Bell post it: Mike,
Here is the auto insurance paper. I’m sending Tony and Helen’s birthday gift. It was in a box, but I took it out and I’m sending it to you along with the auto insurance papers. I called you yesterday, Sunday, but I guess you guys left early to go to THE GOLDEN DOOR. Well, I hope you have a good time. Talk to you when you come back. Love Your Mom.
My brother, Tony, his wife, Helen (and girls Lauren and Leigh) sent me this cute money lip from Tiffany along with a $25 Gift Certificate from NORDSTROM. On May 12th I sent Tony a 2lb. Box of See’s candies nuts and chews. It’s one of Tony’s favorite pastimes.
June 18, 1999
It’s almost been a week since Alan and I were being pampered at THE GOLDEN DOOR. We’re still talking about how wonderful it was. A hike every morning, great, healthy food. We looked healthier and transformed by the time we left.
Last night, Alan and I took Bill Dailey to dinner at IL FORNAIO in Beverly Hills. We told Bill all about our visit to THE GOLDEN DOOR.
Bill remarked, “Oh, I’ve heard of that place, but I’ve never been there. I have been to Rancho La Puerta resort in Mexico, and it used to be associated with THE GOLDEN DOOR.”
We confirmed that it still is associated with THE GOLDEN DOOR. Bill went on talking and certainly did not hide his Republican views. We remained silent. Bill can be unlikeable, aloof and rude without realizing it. He’s also so ‘very gay’ even though he went on to speak of his late wife who died of food poisoning while in Mexico in 1991. I never thought about it until now, but I wonder if he poisoned her in Mexico? No, he could not be that ruthless, could he? Would he have the notion to kill his investment advisors? That’s a scary thought. I met Bill when he opened an account at Charles Schwab & Co. He liked my demeanor, so he’s considering the idea of becoming a Verona client; however, he may be too high maintenance for us. He only has about $200,000 (that I know of) anyway. I’d rather focus on million-dollar clientele. If you have five clients with $200,000 you get five headaches. If you have one client with one million it’s only one headache. Ha-ha While at THE GOLDEN DOOR I was reminded by the sweet nutritionist lady that “we are what we eat”. Fruits and vegetables are a must. I certainly got enough during my week at THE GOLDEN DOOR. I just need to work on getting more food that is “picked from trees our from the earth” in my regular daily life.
Each day at THE GOLDEN DOOR I received a fan with breakfast along with my detailed daily schedule. I was so good about following my schedule until Wednesday when I missed the morning hike and passed on the noontime Water Volleyball. I got back on track on Thursday and took a break on Saturday morning. I didn’t care to play tennis.
June 18, 1999, 9:45AM
I have four tiny pricks from an actual porcupine named SPIKE that we saw from the San Diego Zoo. The porcupine was visiting THE GOLDEN DOOR. We learned that the porcupine likes to masturbate. The zoo attributes this to the fact that he has so much “time” on his hands. Our group laughed. I’m sure some of us could relate to that. I also kept a small vile THE GOLDEN DOOR gifted us that contained natural lavender oil. It helped my blisters from my feet after the first two days of hiking. Carli let a sweet note with the oil and bandages in my room.
Carli wrote: “Michael, Hope your boo boos feel better!! Carli.”
I kept my name tag that THE GOLDEN DOOR gave me. C2 was my room number, and the blue dot signified my health problems (which were none) and my willingness to focus on physical challenges. The little black dot meant that it was your first visit to THE GOLDEN DOOR (this was true for both Alan and me).
Yuichi Sugiyama was the elder, Thai bald guy who taught us how to dance to Broadway tunes. He was very effeminate and gay but so fun to have as an instructor. He made the handful of us laugh while in dance class.
Gloria sent me this JERRY’s postcard (located at 101 Prince Street) from SOHO, NYC. We had eaten breakfast there, but it wasn’t as good as THE MERCER KITCHEN which was right up the block. I look forward to being in NYC, Tribeca—as a New York resident and a California resident.
This was my INCH MONITOR at THE GOLDEN DOOR when I was measured on June 7th, the first day we arrived. I had never measured myself at the end of the week, but I felt far superior. Paul, my Fitness trainer, who was bout twenty-four years old measured my body fat at about 16% which was supposedly good. My goal was 15.6% by the end of the week. Paul wrote a nice note on the above left of my INCH MONITOR. He probably just hoped for a cash tip. He wasn’t the most personable. I loosened him up a couple of times by getting him to laugh. He did give me a nice program to take home. I just NOW did the abdominal exercises. Now, if I do them EVEYR DAY I just may have a visible six pack. While at THE GOLDEN DOOR I learned of the LABYRINTH. It is a very meditational round pattern that people walk through. Once the instructor described it as how ALL PEOPLE have a pattern throughout their entire lives in that Sometimes we STOP; Sometimes we RUSH; Sometimes we TURN AROUND and LOOK BACK. One guy, Robert F Marshall, a prominent Entertainment lawyer, rushed through it like he does through life. When I walked it, I savored the moments during my walk, but I did notice things differently and more creatively than most of the others. I suppose I have a different sort of flair than most.
June 19, 1999, 11:25PM
On Tuesday morning at THE GOLDEN DOOR, we did the Outdoor Challenge. It included kayaking, mountain biking, hiking and a vigorous varietal circuit of abdominal work, climbing, jump roping and running! It sounded more vigorous than it was. I did it all. In any case, I was the GI JOE OUTDOOR CHALLENGE AWARD. That was cool. I was, however, at forty, the youngest of the men. There were a few around 44 or so but it was nice to get the GI JOE Award. If anything, it was inspirational for me as an aspiring, want-to-be athlete. Go! Michael! Go! Who was there? This is the list of guys that were at THE GOLDEN DOOR the week Alan and I were there. WE later learned from a June 1999 New York magazine that Jeff Ayeroff came under an assumed name! He is really Danny Lee Yarbrough Jr. Like we’d care knowing his real name and that he is the CEO of Sony Music Distribution Division?
At my initial interview upon arrival to THE GOLDEN DOOR I requested my meals be limited to 1100 calories per day. I was pretty good at sticking to it and not feeling super hungry after all the exercise. The other guys made me hungrier with all their talk about restaurants and what not. The menus will forever be inspiration to me, knowing that food is a necessary nourishment throughout one’s day, but it need NOT be in huge portions or bad foods. On the last night at THE GOLDEN DOOR Alan, myself, Alberto Andrade, Ron de Salvo and Dan Cuevas escaped to the outside world. We went to see INSTINCT, a 1999 film starring Anthony Hopkins, Donald Sutherland, and Cuba Gooding Jr. About a noted anthropologist who left society to live in the jungle and is imprisoned for murder. It’s up to a young psychiatrist to get through to him. It was a decent psychological thriller. There were long lines to see the AUSTIN POWERS movie. The people of the San Marcos area looked like typical mid-westerners.
One evening, Deborah Szekely (owner of THE GOLDEN DOOR) joined us for dinner. She’s a 77-year-old who founded the place with her husband. Now the place in Escondido is owned by the Wyndham Resorts & Hotels but who knows if it will change hands again.
She surprised me when she looked at me and asked, “So, what do you do?”
I had no problem answering that question, but I take offense to someone asking that question as ‘the first question’ when they don’t know you at all. It came out of left field. Like, does it matter? Well, I told her I was an Investment Advisor. She spent most of her mealtime gabbing with Ted Pedas of Washington D.C., a repeat visitor. She lectured us all later to donate our money to charities.
Alan and I left THE GOLDEN DOOR early, at 8AM on June 13th for our journey home to Los Angeles. That very evening we planned dinner with Jak and Gloria only to surprise them with an Anniversary dining experience for them. Richard (Alan’s brother) and his wife, Leslie, were there along with their sons (Larry and Michael), Susan and Jaan Torv and Lauren and Carrie. Jack and Gloria were totally surprised, and we had one elegant dining experience at THE PENISNSULA HOTEL in ‘The Belvedere’ private room thanks to our friend, Frank Bowling, who arranged it all. It was a beautiful setting and a beautiful memory.
I liked the Birthday card Reed Campbell sent me. He is now 80 or so. His eyes are going but his wife wrote the card on his behalf. They're too sweet to think of me. They currently live in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Inside the '40' card was imprinted: Forty...is when you really start appreciating all the bull. Ha-haMy cousin MaryAnn Gehling emailed me this story to me on May 23rd, three days before my Birthday. She wrote this story. She was the princess, and I was ‘the doe’. I believe she is not fulfilled with my relationship with her. She wants more—much more. She is still troubled from the death of her brother, Dave, in Vietnam and her successful fight with breast cancer.
On June 15th we saw this play (A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’s DREAM) but we had to walk out at intermission. Alan, Gloria and Jack and I all agreed that it was a “sleeper” and we could not endure another minute of it. Birda sent me the cutest Birthday card of a couple inside the trunk of a car. Inside was imprinted: WELCOME TO THE AGE WHERE JUST ABOUT ANYPLACE WORKS FOR A NAP. In her own personal words, she wrote this (which also made me laugh):
“Michael, Hope you have a great day. I found a bike that is older than both of us and it is still in good shape too! Happy Birthday, Always, Birda”
Birda Bingham and I met in Alameda when I was an avid bicyclist in the mid 1980s. She would race and/or cross my path on her bike. We still maintain regular correspondence. She still lives in Alameda and will soon become a grandmother! It pays to start early so you don’t have to be an old grandma. I loved this birthday card she sent me about being ‘40’ and naps. It’s too cute and I do enjoy my naptime. I do.
June 19, 1999, 12-Noon
I started a YAHOO CLUB on the internet for anyone named ARMIJO. I have ‘34’ members already. Here are some of the fellow Armijo distant relatives I’ve me. I knew Chirs Armijo. We met in person in San Francisco when Alan and I were there for a weekend. He joined the US ARMY this year and want to travel and focus on ethnic studies. Another ARMIJO who scanned his photo a couple of time is ARMANDO ARMIJO CASTRO. I don’t know much about him. 
June 20, 1999, 9:45AM
Today is Father’s Day. Lauren and Carrie made breakfast for Alan and I “in bed”. It was so thoughtful and out of the ordinary for me as I don’t like to eat in bed. Ha-ha. They have more in store for us today. I think we’re traveling to Newport Beach and Laguna Beach. Today is also my anniversary with Alan as we met on November 20th in 1989, and we try to remember to celebrate on the 20th of each month.
Yesterday, Alan and I accomplished a lot. We finally picked up the 1971 Red Mercedes 280SL. It’s ready. WE even got a nice car stereo for it at AL & ED’s. My BMW 328is was returned to Santa Monica BMW on Friday, June 18th. It was rather easy. Now I have no more BMW car payments and not car insurance as my lease has ended. It’s a nice load off my mind. I don’t need it. LESS...makes life simpler.
Yesterday, Alan and I treated ourselves to a double feather movie night: Disney’s TARZAN and Time Warner’s AUSTIN POWERS THE SPY WHO SHAGGED ME. We liked TARZAN much better. The night before we went to Marix-Tex Mex with John Tuzziano and saw a movie called THE IDEAL HUSBAND (based on a comedic play written by Oscar Wilde back in the late 1890s). It explores themes of political corruption, blackmail, honor and forgiveness. It starred Rupert Everett, Julianne Moore. It was superb. We realized (Alan and I) that we must go to London again for theater. It’s one city that we do love. THE IDEAL HUSBAND really is worth seeing. It takes you back to when people had to used messengers versus today’s impersonal email. It takes you to London with a humorous twist if one pays close attention to the English proper way with words. I loved it. Alan loved it. We must go to London again because of it.
Strangely enough, Alan’s real estate partner, Art K, remembered my birthday by getting me a card (of a dog?) and a bottle of VOYAGEUR cologne. Whatever. I see it as it’s the thought that counts. Art is giving his ‘femme fatale’ boyfriend, John, a birthday party on June 25th at some Westwood Restaurant. I’m glad I am going to my mom’s house that weekend. I guess Alan will go even though he’s not so thrilled about it. I rarely see Art and I only hear about him because of Alan’s involvement with him in his real estate holdings. From what I do hear, Art has had liposuction and dyed his hair red orange, trying to pretend he’s thirty when he looks fifty. Oh well, such is life for some folks.
Pat Crowley, a San Francisco schoolteacher that I used to visit to inspire her 4th and 5th graders to write has continued to maintain touch with me. She sent me this card from MAUI, Hawaii. Ironically, my brother, Tony, and my sis-in-law, Helen, were both in Maui at the same time Pat was there. Pat asked me twice how my Verona business is doing. I wonder if she’s toying with the idea of becoming a client. Maybe not—my friend Grace Reyes who I reconnected with at our 20th high school reunion was also in Hawaii and sent me this card. Are these hints for me to return to the Aloha State?
I’ve been there eight or nine times. We have a line-up of about ten Verona clients now. This week I signed-up Bill Willcox who has over $2 million in assets. That was a nice catch. He is truly a kind man. Alan and I are meeting him for lunch tomorrow on June 21st.
In My Own Words: BEING 40 YEARS OLD
Here’s a snapshot of Alan Freiman and I in JAMAICA, The West Indies. Alan sure organized a delightful 40th birthday party for me. Jack and Gloria, Susan and Jaan and Lauren were all there as previously written. I had a good time. I’m beginning to feel that ‘40’ is no big deal. Just a reminder to enjoy life and be healthy and happy. If you’ll notice this artsy collage, it depicts me. It was made for me by VIOLET LEVI. She was one of the first people I met after moving to Los Angeles in November 1989 (the same month I met Alan). She responded to a written ad I put in the local newspaper about meeting a girl. Yes, I wanted a ‘real girlfriend’. She was the only one who responded. In fact, she clipped my ad for the collage:
A GQ TYPE man seeks fit model type woman for relationship and future commitment. I like biking, film, travel and romancing. “Let’s at least meet for brunch!” I recall that Violet once told me, “Any guy who would write this I’ve got to meet.” And so, she did. We did. We went to brunch. When I look back at this collage, she made for me I do see me. It does remind me of me. I laugh when I look at it now and again though. A MAN AND HIS PASSION. Hmm...and THE BIKE, biked was a passion of mine. Sometimes I feel I lose certain passions, and they need to be re-ignited. I don’t feel this is uncommon for most people who need a jump start and motivation to move along in the right direction with their passions. I really should get on my bike more. I like the abdominal exercised I learned at THE GOLDEN DOOR. I’ll let those be my passion for now.
June 21, 1999, 5:45PM
I may not be an official “FATHER” but it’s not like there are NO KIDS and/or Generation Y in my life. I really have nine kids: Lauren, Carrie, Ashley, Holly, Ally, Dylan, Lauren and Leigh and another daughter from a 1985-Sperm Donation that I gave to the Bary Area Sperm Bank in Oakland California. It’s such a great feeling to get a Father’s Day card like this one. It really means a lot to me. It made me smile when I opened my mail. It never hursts to be reminded that you’re loved. I did have a great Father’s Day with Alan, Jack, Gloria and Lauren and Carried in Manhattan Beach for a picnic and a dinner in Laguna Beach. June 21, 1999, 6:10PM
Helen, my sister-in-law works so hard. She’s amid moving to Reno, NV and taking on a new Premise Sales job to sell Yellow Page Advertising. I’m sure I’ll be visiting them in Reno. Helen emails me a lot. She sent these two emails about a week before Mother’s Day. I was able to join them all for dinner on Mother’s Day. It was nice but it seems so “Eat & Run” with not enough conversation. June 21, 1999, 8:30PM
Lauren and Carrie Freiman gave me the most thoughtful and touching Father’s Day card (above) yesterday. I had to hold back the tears when I read it in front of them. It touched me so much. I know they love me as I do them. I always felt I had to be careful with every word I said to them over the years for fear of their hating me. Maybe I felt that way because I came into the picture when Alan was separated from his wife, Susan. Somehow, I just couldn’t help but feel like I was in the way. Well, time has shown that’s hardly the case. The girls surprised us with a great Father’s Day picnic in Manhattan Beach, then a drive to dinner at DIZZ’s in Laguna Beach, a place we really LOVE.
Alan and I went to the gym early this morning with Lauren and Carrie. Alan tried to get Carrie a new gym membership, but the gym has such rip-off rates that it’s hard to make a deal. I’m glad I only pay $70 per year.
At 1PM, Alan and I met our newest client for lunch at DANTE’s in Pacific Palisades. Bill Willcox is such a mild-mannered 73-year-old man who is so easy to deal with that Alan and I only dream of having twenty more “clone” clients like him. Alan said, “There are so many single, elderly people out there, sitting on two million or more...if only we could spot them all.”
We’re lucky to have Bill Willcox as a new client and he’s lucky to have us. We’ll certainly make good on his $2,278,000, putting every effort to increasing it. It was tough getting conversation out of Bill. He’s so lonely since his wife died. I sure hope he saw our open arms of friendship today. I really think he did. He really appreciated the token gift of the Italian Photo Album/Journal I gifted him.
After lunch, Alan and I did our hike at Temescal Canyon Park just off Sunset Boulevard. The only sad thing was Alan’s $60 parking ticket. At least MICROSOFT stock was up 4 points to $85. That helped.
Hey, look...two of my favorite nouveau late 1990’s actors: Matthew McConaughey and Ashley Judd. They’re both so great. Isn’t it clear as to why? Just take a good look.
And now, it’s time to play some piano music...
"I guess the best thing was finding out that I was good at something—at playing the piano. Playing piano gave me a place in the world. And...it was something I could do when I was angry or upset, or even happy. It was a way to express my feelings when I didn’t even know what they were.” --Christina Baker Kline, in her book ORPHAN TRAIN, a novel
