Give my books a read and a review!

What the honey-dick is going on, all you beautiful-wienered folk who’re enjoying the summer market air when suddenly your bow-tied dick unravels from around your thigh, falls down your shorts, and plops wetly onto the sunbaked cement, everyone stops and stares for a good long moment, then its incredible glans and gorgeous frenulum commandeers their minds and reduces them into a state of dick-craving frenzy, holy shit they’re galloping toward you on all fours snarling like a cross between Gollum and a fast-zombie, you run for your life and knock over stalls and chairs, hurdle benches and bodies and random-ass objects, a rescue chopper swoops in low and you snag on to the rails but a bunch of penis-crazed horndogs clamp onto your shaft causing the pilot to look down and scream THERE’S TOO MUCH WEIGHT I CAN’T GO HIGHER you’re kicking them in the face as they ascend your womb-hammer some of them fall but there’s SO DAMN MANY OF THEM—

And THAT, my friends is why you double-knot the bowtie!  Stop honey-dicking the goddamn public—you’re disturbing the peace and endangering their lives!!!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing