April 25, 2025: Our Columbo rewatch continues with “Candidate for Crime”!

This episode aired November 4, 1973.

Katey Sagal, who has a bit part as a secretary at campaign headquarters, is the daughter of Boris Sagal who directed this episode.

Actor Robert Karnes, who played Sergeant Vernon in this episode, played Sergeant Grover in The Greenhouse Jungle (1972).

This was one of the rare episodes in which Columbo appeared before the murder is committed. According to Peter Falk: “That was nice. You’re not supposed to see him for twenty minutes and, all of a sudden, he’s the first thing you see.”

My thoughts in chronological viewing order…

That t.v. remote looks like an old Star Trek tricorder.

Wait! Hayward was lying about the threats to his life? A lying politician?

He can’t smoke cigars because they’re bad for his political image. Boy, times have changed. Now anything goes!

Conveniently, the four cops assigned to his security detail are so inept they fail to notice him walk to his car.

He kills his campaign manager. Not only a liar, but ruthless as well. He’s sure to get elected!

Clever – breaking the watch to establish the timeline.

Vickie Hayward doesn’t notice two dozen people sneaking into her house? How drunk is she?

“Take my advice, lieutenant. Change your name. And don’t bite down on anything hard.” Great, but what was the point of this scene?

“That’s what we used to do,”says Columbo. “Throw rocks at the street light.” An admission of guilt. What is the statute of limitations on vandalism?

“What was he talking about?”
“Who?”
“That detective”
“I don’t know, I wasn’t listening.”
To be fair, this garage scene is interminable so you can be excused for drifting off.

Upon finding out some other guy died instead of Hayward, Columbo: “Oh boy, what a relief.” Phew! Fortunately, it was only the unloved campaign manager.

Because this is a low priority murderer, Columbo lands the case. Odd given suggestions in earlier episodes that he was the toast of the department.

When she can’t convince Columbo to go around back and help himself to a piece of cake, Vickie Hayward relents and guides him through the party by the hand like some toddler.

Why would he claim he gave his security detail the slip because he needed to go celebrate his wife’s birthday? Why wouldn’t he be allowed to go? This makes no sense.

Come on the campaign trail with me. It’ll be fun! Bring your secretary! Maybe tell her to bring lingerie because who knows who she might meet!

Columbo is an undecided voter. Love the fact he is brutally honest.

Officially, we don’t have a thing. Unoficially, we don’t have anything either.

What the heck is going on with Columbo’s meandering/frazzled explanation? What are those magnetized car icons sticking to?

Columbo’s argument is that it was too dark to shoot the victim in the carport? What? If I was Hayward, I would point out that, yes, it was dark – which is why they shot the wrong guy!

Columbo points out the secretary did not take the itinerary with her. Why didn’t Hayward just say he wanted to make some last minute changes and planned to give her a revised version later?

Aha! The engine was cold. THAT was a good bit of detecting.

Vito Scotti as the tailor is brilliant – even though the scene goes on way too long.

Going to an affair. His wife’s bowling league. $17.50 a couple!

The secretary is evasive. Columbo: “Well I’m sure that’s what attracted you to him. As a candidate.” Zing.

What the hell is going on with this road check scene? Another pointless narrative meander.

Could Columbo have simply told us he timed the drive in a later scene instead of having us go through this entire sequence. Same goes for the ensuing drawn-out garage scene. He found out off-screen that the garage was closed that night.

One of the rare occasions where Columbo turns down a drink!

The whole jacket-timeline-as-clue feels like a bit of a reach.

Boy, do these scenes feel padded.

Hang on a sec. Columbo casts suspicion on the timeline because “where did the killer make the call after the murder?”. But if the murder was a mob hit, then it wouldn’t have been just a single individual involved. One could have made the hit, the other the call, no?

WAAAAITAMINUTE! Columbo deduces that someone wearing those particular shoes would likely wear that particular watch…which happens to be unbreakable – thus concluding the campaign manager’s watch was switched? What is this nonsense?! Am I still watching Columbo?

Why is Hayward continuing this charade of pretending to be threatened by the mob?

How could his secretary being the one to find the threatening note on his desk make it any less likely that he was the one who put it there? This makes no sense.

The election news coverage feels pretty padded as well.

Sgt. Vernon doesn’t notice the weighty gun and attached suppressor in Hayward’s jacket when he hangs it up? Come on.

A firecracker? Really? And nobody: a) notices the remnants of said firecracker on the floor or b) notes the linger odor those things give off?

Okay, as far as Gotcha’s go, this was a good one but…

This episode was, in a word, awful. The absolute worst episode to date. Padded, plodding, full of extraneous scenes, suspect logic and a murder lacking strong motivation. He killed his campaign manager because he told him to stop seeing his girlfriend? Hayward, you’re a grown man and your campaign manager isn’t your mom. Tell him to F off. He has as much to lose as you do if he reveals the truth about your affair.

Occasionally, I will come across an episode of television or movie so poorly written that it makes me angry. “Candidate for Crime” is the first Columbo instant of this. And I’m amazed that some fans think highly enough of it to even consider it middling. Woof.

My revised episode rankings: 1. Any Old Port in a Storm, 2. Double Shock, 3. A Stitch in Crime, 4. Death Lends a Hand, 5. Suitable for Framing, 6. Dagger of the Mind, 7 Requiem for a Falling Star, 8. Prescription: Murder, 9. Murder by the Book/Ransom for a Dead Man (tie), 10. Lady in Waiting, 11. Etude in Black, 12. The Most Crucial Game, 13. Blueprint for Murder, 14. Lovely But Lethal, 15. The Most Dangerous Match, 16. The Greenhouse Jungle 17. Dead Weight, 18. Short Fuse, 19 and Dead Last. Candidate for Crime.

Finally, let’s consider the evidence and decide whether our murderer will be found GUILTY or escape with an ACQUITTAL. Well, since Hayward was stupid enough to push this whole “mob is gunning for me” angle even after it was wholly unnecessary, he handed Columbo the evidence that directly links him to the murder. The idiot is going away for a long time. GUILTY.

The post April 25, 2025: Our Columbo rewatch continues with “Candidate for Crime”! appeared first on Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog.