STL: Kindness is Normal

I’m sharing something important: Kindness is normal. Where current events lead us to believe that apathy and cynicism are expected, average behavior – it’s more important than ever to remember that being mean isn’t normal. Kindness is normal. Even if the world makes being kind feel weird, it doesn’t matter. Kindness matters. Kindness is normal.

The Observation

I don’t have to tell you, you already know. The world is full of apathy, cynicism, and cruelty – it’s happening every day. We try to stay above it, but the heartbreak is there for all of us to see every day. I can’t fix it, but we can try to learn.

One thing that stuck out to me is this: Some people react to other individuals with empathy and compassion, others react with apathy and cynicism. I’d like to call it a function of generational or cultural norms, but the fact of the matter is kindness is a universal cultural norm. Maybe you think that treating people with apathy and cynicism is doing them a favor. Maybe you think treating them with apathy and cynicism helps them understand that the world is apathetic and cynical. I get it, someone taught you that lesson. Wasn’t right but they did it. Now, where did you learn that teaching other people that lesson was your job? Shouldn’t you have learned through empathy and compassion that you never want other people to feel that way because of you?

I’m not saying it’s easy to show empathy and compassion after being treated with apathy and cynicism. In fact, my entire life is a masterclass in knowing that lesson. It doesn’t mean I get to go around showing people apathy and cynicism.

Learning this lesson, I have discovered that there is both a carrot and a stick to growth. Growth. On the one hand, the carrot is I get to grow and learn, and people see that I am a person who treats them with empathy and compassion. Maybe it doesn’t immediately lead to Fame and Fortune, but I get to sleep at night knowing that I did not actively try to make people’s days worse. That makes me feel good.

Kindness is a universal cultural norm.

But let’s say, a person who is apathetic and cynical cannot be reasoned with or taught empathy and compassion. Then, there’s a stick to go along with that carrot. Kindness and compassion is everyone’s privilege and responsibility. If somehow you believe that you’ve graduated from showing kindness and compassion, that it’s a ‘you problem?’ Sorry, but you misunderstood the assignment. In fact, I don’t care where you come from or how old you are – you’re a low life creep.

I’m not the Karma Police – You don’t have to worry about me being some sort of avenging angel. But your life is going to be dramatically worse. You will be more lonely, you will be more angry, you will be more confused, and you will be more disconnected from the people around you. You’ll spend your life watching other people in your community, enjoy more connection and more meaning, and you’ll never really understand why.

Now if this doesn’t sound like something you care about, no problem. I’m not your dad. What I can say is, as a science fiction author who happens to care about people, this is an important learning lesson for anybody who wants to enjoy more connection and more meaning to their lives. That’s what I’m focusing on, and it’s led me to other people who also care at that level about their quality of their life. Like attracts like, nature abhors a vacuum, so on and so forth …

Scifi and Kindness

Think of science fiction as a ‘kindness delivery machine.’ I write scifi because it’s good for me and for my brain. The point of writing scifi is for me to create some emotions and feelings and share them with you. You feel those feelings, there’s a part of you that goes ‘I feel seen.’ You read my stories and you get to take a moment out of your day where you aren’t thinking about your troubles. Then, mission accomplished. My kindness delivery machine is working.

So if you’re taking notes – here’s the takeaways:

The strongest people continue showing empathy and compassion after being shown apathy and cynicism.Kindness is normal, no matter how weird they may make you feel.If you think you’re above being kind – you’re a lowlife and you misunderstood the assignment.Scifi is a kindness delivery machine.

I hope you can take this information with you as a proof-of-concept that your kindness and your decency are worthwhile endeavors. No matter how hopeless, or desperate we get – kindness matters. Your kindness is correct. Kindness is normal.

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