I don’t get it!

 

Why not getting what youwant can be good for you (even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time).

We’ve all been there. That make-or-break, do-or-diescenario where we feel it in our bones that this is our perfect moment. Heck, we might even hear Martine McCutcheon tuningup in the background. It could be a job, a project, a pitch to a literary agent,or a relationship…anything that matters to us.

And then somehow, impossibly, it doesn’t go our way. What can we learn from disappointment, defeat and disaster?Quite a lot, actually. 1.    We can learn resilience. Think of it as resistance training for the ego/ soul!  2.    We can learn to adapt if faced with unexpected outcomes. When one doorcloses…basically the door is shut so there’s no sense in waiting there anylonger. We have to decide what we do next. 3.    We can learn not to associate our contributions – or our self-worth –with external outcomes, especially the negative outcomes. (Eventually we canapply the same approach to our successes as well.) Rudyard Kipling wason to something. 4.    We can learn to focus on our inputs – those things we can actuallycontrol. That, in turn, may bring discernment so that we make wiser choices atthe outset. 5.    Sometimes what we want isn’t what we need. A deeper understanding of whyyou wanted something in the first place brings self-knowledge. 6.    We’ll eventually disavow the notion that the world is fair or ameritocracy. It isn’t. Understanding that will inform your expectations. 7.    We learn that not only is it not all about us, it never was.  

“We are not defined by what happens to us, but bywhat we do about what happens to us.”*

 

About me

I'm a freelance writer, serial novelist, and speaker.*

My books live here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/author/B0034ORY08/allbooks

 

* And even that definitionis a limited perspective.

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