I’ve Failed. This is the Only way Forward

I’ve failed. 

Your main identity isn’t mainly a function of your activity.  Your ultimate identity is that you are ultimately loved unconditionally.

I got a text last week from my husband where he tenderly and gently shared how I had failed him during a conversation, and he wasn’t wrong.

And my stomach dropped and my heart cracked and I immediately texted him back that he was very right, and I was very, very sorry. 

I’ve botched all kinds of things and I’ve hurt people over the years; I’ve wounded unintentionally and I’ve fallen miserably. I wish it wasn’t true, but I’ve failed people I love, and, in all kinds of ways, done what I shouldn’t have done, and haven’t done what I should have done, and knowing that you aren’t always the way you hoped, and you haven’t loved always the way you’ve wanted, can leave you right flat-out undone.

Honestly? In the midst of all my daily failures and painful falling short, there’s only one guy in all the world I really want to be: the guy in the Good Book who identifies himself as “the one whom Jesus loves.”  

There’s genuinely no greater relief in all this striving, stumbling world: 

Your main identity isn’t mainly a function of your activity. 

You are human – and you are still the one that, ultimately, Jesus loves unconditionally. 

Your ultimate identity is that you are ultimately loved unconditionally.

You fail – and still, you are not ultimately a failure. 

You get it wrong – and still, you are not primarily wrong. 

You make a mess of things — and still, you are not mainly a mess.

You are human – and you are still the one that, ultimately, Jesus loves unconditionally. 

Because when you follow the One who says, “I am the Bread of Life” – you can fail to always nourish others in countless ways, and you still get to say: “I am the one who Jesus loves.”

When you follow the One who says, “I am the Light of the World” – you can be struggling with dark thoughts and be wrestling with the shadows and fail to light up every room, and you still get to fully feel the unwavering reality that: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

When you follow the One who says,”I am the Good Shepherd” – you can wander off and get lost and fail to take the shortest, straightest way, and you still get to be embraced with the assurance of knowing: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

When you follow the One who says,”I am the Good Shepherd” – you can wander off and get lost and fail to take the shortest, straightest way, and you still get to be embraced with the assurance of knowing: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

When you follow the One who says, “I am the Door”  – you can feel boxed in by everyone and run yourself into a thousand dead ends and slam hard against a million brick walls, and you still get to experience the deep comfort of saying: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

When you follow the One who says, “I am the resurrection and the Life” –  you can feel numbed to all kinds of pain and deadened with grief for all kinds of heartache, and you still get the real, embodied relief of saying: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

When you follow the One who says, “I am the true vine” — you don’t have to force any fruit production to earn anyone’s accolades, you don’t have to perform, pretend or perfect any impressive productivity, and you still get to completely rest in knowing: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

When you follow the One who says, “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life” – you don’t have to know the way, you don’t have to find the way, you don’t have to forge your way, you simply get to be with the One who is the Way, the One who gives you His life, so you can say what is always the truth: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

It’s only when you know your identity as beloved — that you actually begin to LIVE! 

It’s only when you know your identity as beloved — that you actually begin to LIVE! 

Identity, it literally means “the state of being the same”— coming from the Latin root word “identitatem” meaning “sameness.”  Which means that one’s true identity, regardless of changing circumstances, wavering emotions, or different situations, your core identity is unchangeable, stable, and always forever the same.

No criticism can change it.  And no failing can’t shake it. 

Lists – accomplished or not – can’t determine it. And no mark – checkmarks or smudge marks – can define it. 

No adversity ever has permission to be your identity, and no activity – good or bad – ever gets to be the ultimate framework to shape your identity. You aren’t ever just a sum of your yesterdays, and you are far more than any of your messes tomorrow, and because of the infinite heart of the one who is the great I AM – you get to ultimately say that your identity is: “I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

No adversity ever has permission to be your identity, and no activity – good or bad – ever gets to be the ultimate framework to shape your identity.

When your identity is on the Rock Himself, your identity is rock-solid — and as long as your identity is hidden in Christ, it doesn’t matter what mountain rises ahead of you: You are brave enough for today, because He is. You are strong enough for what’s coming, because He is. And, when He is in you, moving through you, you will have more than enough for all that is, because He always is more than enough.

I’ve failed. And somedays, miserably.

And my kind man still reaches for my hand and I lace fingers through his and, in all kinds of ways, grace is always coming to meet us.

And when I lay my head on the pillow at the end of the day, that is the softest place in the world to finally land, the only place where the soul can surely, deeply rest:

“You are still the one who Jesus loves.”

Free Identity in Christ Cards: Our Thank-You for Pre-Ordering “Loved to Life”

It’s one of the reasons why I wrote the book, “Loved to Life”, following Jesus through every chapter in the book of John – because John is the one who refers to himself over and over and over again, at least 5 times, as, quite strikingly ,“‘the disciple whom Jesus loved.”

That was John’s ultimate identity – and it’s meant to be ours.

That when we look in the mirror first thing every morning, when we fail, when we mess up, when we put our head down on our pillow at the end of the day – more than any title, more than any position, more than any work – that we can know, in the very marrow of our bones, our truest identity: 

“I am the one who Jesus loves.” 

If you too long to be more grounded in your truest identity as always deeply beloved – then this is your personal invitation to pre-order “Loved to Life” and join us for the 40-Day with Jesus, through the book of John — and, as our sincerest thanks for joining us on this 40-Day pilgrimage to knowing our truest identity as always beloved – please accept this pack of FREE IDENTITY IN CHRIST CARDS

Pre-Order & Claim Your Free Gifts! Did you already pre-order loved to life?

Thank you! I cannot wait to take this journey with you. Make sure you’ve filled out the free gift request form, and these printables — along with so many more free gifts! — will be emailed to you in the coming days!