Like a Bad Penny

Return-related metaphors tend to be either grandiose or disgruntled. The returning person or thing is a phoenix… or a dog coming back to its vomit. The boomerang, I suppose, is relatively neutral, but I never have succeeded in getting one to come back in my direction, and thus I do not trust that they do so on general principle.

Be that as it may, I have returned to New England, after my protracted Baltimorean sojourn. The process has not been in the slightest phoenix-like. It has been entirely flame-free. Thankfully it is also true that no vomit has been involved. (There is, however, a dog.) Let’s not talk about the boomerangs. Instead let it simply be said that I’m back to being comfortably north of the 42nd parallel, and slowly beginning both to get my bearings and to move things from my giant shipping container into my new digs.

Just before my actual move, I traveled to, of all places, Natchitoches, Louisiana, to attend the high school graduation of this fine young man, who I’m proud to say graduated with honors from the quite selective and demanding Louisiana School for Math, Science, and the Arts.

The young man in question is my Philosopher’s youngest child.  The Philosopher, happy to be in the midst of all three of his sons, is visible here.

I can’t say I was a big fan of Natchitoches, although I can give a wholehearted recommendation of the outstanding tamales sold at the farmer’s market by the rather taciturn fellow from Zwolle.  Of the famed Natchitoches Meat Pie I cannot say as much in favor.  (Sorry, the Zwolle Tamale is by far the superior meat-encased-in-starch food item.)

I do, however, covet the sash and tiara awarded to Miss Natchitoches Meat Pie, which can only make the life of the Natchitoches Meat Pie Queen a glamorous one. So glamorous in fact that I must show you the tiara, as worn by currently reigning Meat Pie Queen Katlyn Lee Peavy.

It may be true that I have hatched a plan to, er, “borrow” this tiara and its accompanying sash and ceremonial cape for a coordinated commando photographic invasion of the town of Chunky, Mississippi for my next set of author photos.  (Surely there must be a “Welcome to Chunky” sign next to which I could pose?  I know they have a town hall…)  Be on the alert, Kyle Cassidy.

The move itself has been only halfway effected.  My Baltimore posse helped me load the big container, whereupon The Cat Space Moving Co. spirited it away to Cat Space, which is that place cats go when you know they’re around someplace but you can’t find them anywhere and they have, for all intents and purposes, simply vanished.  The container has since rematerialized here in central Massachusetts, where we are grouchily enduring the chill rains of what my dear Elizabeth Bear refers to as “Junuary.”  One is given to understand that it’s meant to at least not rain this weekend when my New England bodhisattvas of moving karma will help me unload said big container.  I am holding you to that, Weather Underground, do you hear me?

Work-wise, I am pleased to note that the The Unapologetic Fat Girl’s Guide to Exercise and Other Incendiary Acts is about to go to production, and will be out from Ten Speed in early 2013.  I’ve also just signed a contract for a quirky, delightful project about MFK Fisher that I’ll be doing for Feminist Press.  Not a biography (Joan Reardon already wrote that, and it’s very good) but a short book about my relationship to Fisher’s work, speaking as a reader, writer, cook, eater, and feminist.  You can look for that later in 2013.

The trade paper edition of Straight: The Surprisingly Short History of Heterosexuality is due out soonish, too.  There are, as ever, other projects simmering, but we don’t talk about those until the ink’s dry on the contracts.

Oh!  I would be remiss if I didn’t remind you all that I am booking campus visits, lectures, and suchlike for fall semester.  Want me to speak at your college, university, high school, or even your corporate campus?  Let’s talk!

Also, I have space in my schedule for one or two developmental editing projects this summer.  If you are working on a book or book proposal, and have been thinking about hiring an experienced editor to help you develop your book and get it ready for presentation to publishers, agents, and so forth, talk to me.