What, Me Ulcers?

A few weeks ago, I started getting strange, on-off pain in the middle of my chest. It felt like someone was making a fist just above my diaphragm and was very much like a gall stone attack, except I had my gall bladder out years ago. It clearly wasn't anything cardiac. Still, I went to the doctor about it.

My doctor examined and frowned and examined and frowned and in the end, he said, "I have no clue what this could be. Are you feeling it now?"

"Yes."

"The only thing I can think of is maybe an ulcer, but even that seems remote. Still, we should get you checked for it. The clinic can put a camera down your throat and check." 

"Oh," I said. "Good thing I don't have a gag reflex."

"They put you under for this one," the doctor said. "Here's the clinic's number."

Hoo. As you know, Bob, anesthesia is a major source of anxiety for me, and rightfully so, considering the horrible things the staff at That One Clinic said about and did to me while I was under. So just making the appointment got me a little upset, especially since the doctor said this was a "just in case" kind of test.

A few days later, I was diagnosed with a urinary tract infection.

Men don't often get UTIs. I've certainly never had one. But when I saw blood in the toilet bowl, I proceeded with some haste to an urgent care clinic. (I wasn't in pain, so I didn't go to the ER.) Urgent care ran a couple tests and determined I had an advanced UTI. Men, you see, often don't show symptoms until the condition becomes advanced, even to the point where it's climbed up to the kidneys. It also turns out that men who are prone to kidney stones are also prone to UTIs from your own internal bacteria. Well, that's special, innit?

The urgent care doctor put me on antibiotics and I did the cranberry juice thing in case it was helpful. The infection cleared up in a few days. The strange pain also went away. Hmmm.

I emailed my urologist to report what had happened. Could have been the pain problem? If so, did I still need to do the stomach camera thing?

He responded that a UTI wouldn't ever cause the pain I was describing, so I should go through with the procedure. Sigh.

Yesterday was procedure day. I'd been growing increasingly nervous, and I kept telling myself that this was an easy, straightforward process, and it was through my mouth instead of down below. I was still severely shaky by the time we arrived at the clinic. I had also disguised my little recorder as a finger splint so I could record everything that happened while I was unconscious. 

For the prep, I was supposed to eat nothing for the eight hours beforehand, and have no liquids four hours beforehand. I followed this. I ate a good breakfast and was finished eating before 7:30 AM, exactly eight hours before my 3:30 PM procedure, and I stopped fluids at 11:30. At the appointed time, Darwin drove me to the clinic.

The staff at the clinic was very nice. Also, I didn't even have to take off my sweats or even my shoes--only my shirt, and that only so they could attach a heart monitor, which made me feel better. The IV went into my hand, which was also very nice. I prefer that over the elbow. And even nicer, they said they used propofol only. No Versed. I hate Versed because it wrecks my memory (see anxiety above), and was happy to hear this news. So three yays in a row! I still activated the recorder taped to my finger.

They wheeled me into the operating room, got me positioned, put a guard in my mouth, and injected the propofol. I got dizzy as I always do, and then I was back in the recovery room feeling blurred and woozy. Oddly, I remember dreaming, something people don't usually do under anesthesia.

It turned out that there was still food in my stomach, even though I'd followed the directions to the letter. As a result, they weren't able to examine my stomach very well. However, they did find multiple ulcers on my esophagus. This surprised me quite a lot--no one in my family gets them that I know of.

But I =am= under considerable long-term stress a lot. (More on this in a later entry.) And this would explain the strange pains. My doctor was right.

The clinic put me on massive doses of Prilosec and sent me home. I need to go back to try again in a few weeks so they can get a better view of my stomach, and this time I'll have to go 24 hours on a liquid diet. Today I listened to the sound file and heard nothing strange, hurtful, or even interesting. So, good!

Though I do have ulcers. 



 

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