The Problem with Dialog
The term dialog describes the conversation between one or more characters in writing. It ranges from the most important part of the book to being completely absent. Why and when is it necessary? That depends on the writing and story style. In my books, I use dialog to convey emotions and round out the characters, but other authors use it to convey information between characters or during a social interaction.
How do I create dialog? I imagine myself speaking and sometimes verbalizing the words to get in the mood. I find this an easy and natural process, but there is a big problem. To explain the issue, this is what I said to my wife this morning. (I was not awake.)
“Umm, hey. After work, I’m going to get… Mmm, go to the store after work. I need to buy… We’re out of soda because I think I drank the last can. You need some stuff? Mmm, from the store.”
Well, not A+ writing, but you know what I am trying to ask. What should I have said? “I am going to the store after work to buy soda. Do you need anything?” True, but that is not what I said.
People’s speech is loaded with all kinds of grammar boo-boos. Run-on sentences? Fragments? Dangling modifiers? Wrong words? Pause words? Pronoun disagreement? Improper sentence structure? Bring it!
And then there is slang. I grew up in California and was bathed in local words. “Surf’s up” “Excellent” “Dude” “Gnarly” “Bummer” “Chill” “Wipe-out” “Bro” “No biggie” “Radical” “Bail” “SoCal” America has its own superset. “Cool” “Couch potato” “Come again?” “Hit it out of the park” “Home run” “Touchdown” “Woke” “Politically correct” “Cringe” “Legit” “Airhead” Plus world-wide slang and regional slang from other English-speaking countries. To make matters worse, slang is evolving, growing, and shrinking faster than dictionaries can be updated.
Actual dialog is an absolute mess, and it is a wonder that we understand each other. Yet, the Chicago Manual of Style and my grade school teachers have other ideas. Please eliminate that poorly structured mess and replace it with proper English. There is the battle.
I try to keep my dialog realistic by adding as much junk as possible. This includes slang, pause words, incoherent thoughts, side tangents, and bad grammar.
Plus, mistakes! People are not perfect, and their natural speech contains errors. In fact, readers expect imperfection. This might include incorrect logic, forgetting details, miscommunication, or even an intentional lie. The result trips up readers. A good example is a mistake I inserted into the dialog of my second book. At the beginning of the story, the two main characters are in a tense situation, and he forgets her name. We forget all kinds of stuff in real life; this kind of mistake adds to realism. Yet, I had to be mindful of my readers, so she called him out about the error.
My rule is, “If it mostly reads right, go with it.” Well, that is all nice until I try to slip something past a sharp-eyed reader or the dreaded grammar monger. This reader class hates improper sentence structure, slang, pause, and junk words. Satisfying this crowd while trying to make a good book is quite challenging.
Plus, an author must consider the type of character who is speaking: A high school principal who is upset with a student. The mean biker ordering a drink. Street-smart kid convincing their friends they are tough. A rancher with a Texas accent. All their slang, style, and word choices will be different.
The hard part is deciding what to clean up and what to leave as raw. Well, are there guides? There are, but they only advise, “Do your best.”
The editing process feels like an uneasy truce between two warring factions. No matter what choices I make, words are going to die. It has been a long, evolving process. Looking back at the first draft of my first book, the dialog was far too sloppy. The edited result read stiff and unrealistic. My latest book contains an uneasy balance. I keep thinking, “How would they say this?” Arrg. I can only close my eyes and move on to the next sentence.
You’re the best -Bill
December 25, 2024
How do I create dialog? I imagine myself speaking and sometimes verbalizing the words to get in the mood. I find this an easy and natural process, but there is a big problem. To explain the issue, this is what I said to my wife this morning. (I was not awake.)
“Umm, hey. After work, I’m going to get… Mmm, go to the store after work. I need to buy… We’re out of soda because I think I drank the last can. You need some stuff? Mmm, from the store.”
Well, not A+ writing, but you know what I am trying to ask. What should I have said? “I am going to the store after work to buy soda. Do you need anything?” True, but that is not what I said.
People’s speech is loaded with all kinds of grammar boo-boos. Run-on sentences? Fragments? Dangling modifiers? Wrong words? Pause words? Pronoun disagreement? Improper sentence structure? Bring it!
And then there is slang. I grew up in California and was bathed in local words. “Surf’s up” “Excellent” “Dude” “Gnarly” “Bummer” “Chill” “Wipe-out” “Bro” “No biggie” “Radical” “Bail” “SoCal” America has its own superset. “Cool” “Couch potato” “Come again?” “Hit it out of the park” “Home run” “Touchdown” “Woke” “Politically correct” “Cringe” “Legit” “Airhead” Plus world-wide slang and regional slang from other English-speaking countries. To make matters worse, slang is evolving, growing, and shrinking faster than dictionaries can be updated.
Actual dialog is an absolute mess, and it is a wonder that we understand each other. Yet, the Chicago Manual of Style and my grade school teachers have other ideas. Please eliminate that poorly structured mess and replace it with proper English. There is the battle.
I try to keep my dialog realistic by adding as much junk as possible. This includes slang, pause words, incoherent thoughts, side tangents, and bad grammar.
Plus, mistakes! People are not perfect, and their natural speech contains errors. In fact, readers expect imperfection. This might include incorrect logic, forgetting details, miscommunication, or even an intentional lie. The result trips up readers. A good example is a mistake I inserted into the dialog of my second book. At the beginning of the story, the two main characters are in a tense situation, and he forgets her name. We forget all kinds of stuff in real life; this kind of mistake adds to realism. Yet, I had to be mindful of my readers, so she called him out about the error.
My rule is, “If it mostly reads right, go with it.” Well, that is all nice until I try to slip something past a sharp-eyed reader or the dreaded grammar monger. This reader class hates improper sentence structure, slang, pause, and junk words. Satisfying this crowd while trying to make a good book is quite challenging.
Plus, an author must consider the type of character who is speaking: A high school principal who is upset with a student. The mean biker ordering a drink. Street-smart kid convincing their friends they are tough. A rancher with a Texas accent. All their slang, style, and word choices will be different.
The hard part is deciding what to clean up and what to leave as raw. Well, are there guides? There are, but they only advise, “Do your best.”
The editing process feels like an uneasy truce between two warring factions. No matter what choices I make, words are going to die. It has been a long, evolving process. Looking back at the first draft of my first book, the dialog was far too sloppy. The edited result read stiff and unrealistic. My latest book contains an uneasy balance. I keep thinking, “How would they say this?” Arrg. I can only close my eyes and move on to the next sentence.
You’re the best -Bill
December 25, 2024
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