Semi-formal: ‘My Doctir’s Excus’ by Michael R. Burch, age 8

I can eggsplain why Im sick.
Sick as a brick
and my stule is thick.
I came to school
and I caught it from Rick.
Now I’m sick as a brick
and my stule is thick.
I cant do my homework
becus Im sick.
I cant take tests
becus Im a mess.
Blame Rick, the prick!
—signed, my doctir

PS, Thurd grade is hard enuff on kids nervs and bad graids make my simptoms worse! Liten up, doctirs orders!

*****

Michael R. Burch confesses: “I must admit that the whole thing is entirely fictional, and I lied about my age. Poet license! I came up with the poem this morning (December 17, 2024) as soon as I awoke. That happens to me quite bit: having a line in my head as soon as I wake up. I have even composed poems in my sleep a few times. The original poem had normal spelling, but then it occurred to me to turn it into a not-so-artful ‘doctir’s excuse.’
There was no Rick.”

Michael R. Burch’s poems have been published by hundreds of literary journals, taught in high schools and colleges, translated into 22 languages, incorporated into three plays and four operas, and set to music, from swamp blues to classical, 61 times by 32 composers. He is also the founder and editor-in-chief of The HyperTexts.

Illustration: WikiHow: https://www.wikihow.com/Make-Up-a-Good-Excuse-for-Your-Homework-Not-Being-Finished#/Image:Make-Up-a-Good-Excuse-for-Your-Homework-Not-Being-Finished-Step-18.jpg