Appreciate Me For Everything Good I Have Done In The Past

When you die, the world changes
into a funhouse. The funhouse is far away. It collapses
at the speed of light.

I just made that up.

I live in a high-density urban area.

I am hard-working,
detail-oriented, an excellent multi-tasker.
My demeanor in social situations
can be described as ‘low-level panic attack.’
I am honest, tactful, and ironic.
I enjoy screaming. I think it’s funny when people scream.

I think the Nobel Prize is funny.

“I am going to email a shitload of people tonight.” I think that’s funny.

I feel angry. No I don’t. I am bored.
I don’t understand how a number can be negative. One apple
looks like one apple. What does negative-one apple look like?

The world is stupid.

The world I exist in
is really stupid.

I can prove it

at night. In the park, at night,
I can prove anything.

– Tao Lin