"Show Me Yours" is handed in
I've been working pretty hard on the second free story that I volunteered for, for the Love is Always Write event. (Can you say "sucker"? But it was a gorgeous picture and I couldn't resist. And I love writing the freebies.)
I just sent it off to the editing crew (and immediately noticed two more typos- aargh. But I can fix them at the proofreading.) Anyway, I also posted a little snippet of the beginning of this 47,300 word story on the group and I thought I'd put it here too. This one should also be available for download when it releases (probably sometime in July.)
I hope you like this one too (although I'm not hoping to match the amazing reception Into Deep Waters has received.)
Photo description: Two dark-haired young men share a playful moment beside the ocean, framed against a backdrop of waves crashing on a rocky shore. Both men are laughing, wet and tanned, wearing only Speedos. The slimmer man reaches forward to snag the waistband of his friend's swim trunks, pulling them back in a way that exposes part of the other man's taut, rounded ass. The more muscular man reaches back with a hand planted on his friend's close-cropped head, shoving him away.
Dear Author,
It seems like we've known one another for ever, but he doesn't really know me at all. He doesn't know I'm gay and I'm really scared what will happen when he finds out. Especially when he finds out that I don't want to be just friends anymore.
.
****Chapter 1
The doorbell rang as Trey was lifting a batch of cookies out of the oven. He jumped and caught at the cookie sheet with his unprotected free hand as it tipped. Ouch! Fuck! He set the tray on the stovetop, pushed the oven shut with his knee, and slammed on the cold water in the sink for his burned fingers. Damn, that hurt! He tossed the potholder on the counter and let the blessed coolness sluice over his reddened fingertips
The bell rang again, longer. Whoever was out there was getting impatient. Trey sighed, turned off the water, and headed for the front hallway. The tip of his thumb throbbed and he absently stuck it in his mouth as he pulled the door open. And then just about bit it off.
Josh. On his front porch. Grinning at him with that wide, little-boy grin as if it hadn't been eight years since they'd last met. As if Trey hadn't done everything in his power to keep it that way.
There was laughter in Josh's grey eyes. “Hey, Trey, still sucking your thumb?”
Trey yanked his hand out of his mouth. For a moment he fought the impulse to slam the door shut – to just pretend he hadn't opened it and rewind to that last moment before the bell rang, when the worst thing that had happened today was a burned thumb. Not possible. He coughed and found his voice.
“Josh! You?” Jesus, that was smooth. Josh's grin was fading, and Trey realized he was standing planted in his own doorway, staring at Josh like he was some kind of alien. “I mean, wow, come on in! So... what brings you to my neck of the woods?” Without warning me first. Trey stepped back, pulling the door wide, and Josh came inside, brushing past him, the grin restored.
“You mean you don't think I came just to catch up on old times?”
“Yeah, right, you spent good money on a plane ticket just for that.” Suddenly Trey didn't care. It was Josh, here, in his house, after all these years. Trey grabbed Josh in a quick rough hug, and Josh pounded his back and finished up with a noogie, the years falling away.
“It's not the first time I've been back in town, you know. You've just never been around. You travel too damned much, and never out my way either.”
Deliberately. Trey did have some traveling to do for his job, but the panic with which he'd lined up a trip every time Josh announced an impending visit had nothing to do with the urgency of work. And everything to do with this man whom Trey'd had a hopeless crush on for years. Who, judging by the pounding of Trey's heart and the way he could hardly breathe for the sheer presence of the man, he still had a crush on. They were twenty-five instead of seventeen, and of Trey's half dozen boyfriends in the last eight years, a couple had been really nice guys, but apparently it didn't matter. It was still Josh Campbell who could make him crazy just by walking in his front door.
“Yeah, that's the job,” he lied. “But you're here now. Come on and sit down. We'll grab a couple of beers. You can tell me what's up with you.”
“Sure.” Josh sniffed the air. “Wow, what's that I smell? Don't tell me you still make those chocolate-chip orange-peel cookies?”
“Want one?” Trey led the way toward the kitchen, wondering what weird coincidence had made him bake Josh's favorite on the day he showed up at the door.
“One?” Josh laughed, deeper and richer than Trey remembered. “What makes you think I want just one?”
“The fact that you're still just as skinny as you were in high-school?” Josh wasn't skinny. He had a strong lean build under his T-shirt and cutoffs. His dark hair was cut shorter than it used to be back in school, he had more hair on his arms and legs, and better muscle definition in his calves and arms. And thighs. Where Trey hadn't been looking. Really. “Sit down at the table, I'll grab the brews.”
Trey stuck his head in the fridge, pretending to choose between Corona and Dos Equis, to give himself time to cool down. He heard Josh shove a chair back and sit at the kitchen table. Trey grabbed two Dos Equis darks and turned around. Josh was sprawled at ease in the bigger chair, legs akimbo, elbows on the wooden arms, grinning at him.
“Jesus,” Josh said happily. “I'm finally here. You look great. I've missed you, all these years. I know we email and all, but I've really missed just talking to you. I'll have to buy a new laptop with a fucking web cam so we can Skype from now on. To hell with the cost.”
Trey forced a laugh. “Wow, I never thought I'd hear you say that. Aren't you the guy who still uses scotch tape for band-aids like your dad taught you to?”
“I do not!” Josh sobered a little as Trey reached out to hand over his beer. He took the cold bottle from Trey's fingers, gave him a little salute with it, and then took a long pull with his dark eyes fixed on Trey's. “I missed you,” he repeated more softly.
Trey turned away, staring out the window. Every part of him was reacting to Josh like iron filings to a magnet. Josh's voice, Josh's eyes. It was too fucking dangerous. There was a good reason he'd tried so hard to avoid this. He leaned his hips against the counter so Josh couldn't see the happy reaction of his treacherous body. “I missed you too,” Trey said lightly. “No one here is likely to repeatedly hold me down and scrub mud in my hair.”
“I only did that once.” Josh's tone was mock-indignation.
“Twice. At least.”
Josh laughed. “God. This feels like coming home. I have friends in Connecticut, but no one like you. You have to come visit me there soon. I'll show you around, introduce you to everyone.”
Including Stephanie? No, that had been college. Maybe Danielle? Or was Linda the latest? Trey couldn't keep track of Josh's girlfriends. He didn't want to. “Sure. Sometime. So what does bring you back to LA this time?”
“Besides a craving for your cookies? Which you haven't offered me yet?”
Trey's libido tried to make something suggestive out of that, but he beat it back. He grabbed a plate, put a half-dozen of the still warm cookies on it and slapped it down on the table in front of Josh. “Yeah. Besides that.”
Josh took a big bite and grinned at Trey with melted chocolate on his lip. “I need your help. It's for Aunt Julie and Uncle Ted.”
“Are they okay?” Trey didn't think he'd be grinning like that if there was a serious problem. Josh's aunt and uncle had been there for him through some difficult times, and he adored them.
“They're fine. They opened that antique store Aunt Julie always wanted in Craneshore.”
“And...?” Trey pulled out his own chair and sat, sliding under the concealment of the table and not looking at Josh, not at his sparkling eyes, not at his chocolate-smeared mouth.
“This weekend is their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Uncle Ted bought them tickets for a one-week luxury cruise with all the trimmings. The shop assistant was supposed to run the place. But yesterday, not twelve hours after they sailed, the guy got in a serious car accident. He's going to be in hospital for weeks. Aunt Julie called me in a panic, begging me to go watch the place until they could arrange to get back. Uncle Ted called me ten minutes later begging me to call Aunt Julie back and offer to watch the place for the whole week, so her dream trip wouldn't have to be cut short.”
“What did you say?” As if Trey had any doubts. Josh would do anything for Aunt Julie.
“I said yes, of course. I had vacation saved up and this isn't a busy time for us. Summer session is slow and half the profs are off for the Fourth anyway. The lab is coasting right now. I can take a week off for Aunt Julie”
“So I still don't see where I come in.” Other than living close enough for Josh to show up on his doorstep for a visit and in ten seconds wreck eight years of hard-won indifference.
Josh leaned toward Trey and gave him the big, pleading eyes that had gotten Trey in trouble so many times. “Please, Trey, you have to help me. I can't do it by myself. There's the store, with customers and selling things that I have no clue what they even are, and it's the holiday weekend so they'll be busy. Then they have a freaking hobby farm, even bigger than the old one. They have a big vegetable garden and chickens and goats for chrissake. And a pony that has hated me for years. C'mon Trey. I need you.”
Crap. No. “I can't. I... I can't get away right now.”
“Please? Last week you told me your boss was threatening to take away your accrued vacation if you didn't take some of it. You said things were slow. It's just for a week.”
Trey cursed himself. Damn his big mouth. “Something has come up.” Like my dick. “I really can't.”
Josh stared at him with hurt surprise. Trey was surprised too. When had he ever had the strength to say no to Josh when he begged for something? Not since they were about thirteen anyway. But he had to. Because Trey knew that if he spent a week with Josh now, he would tell him. He would admit to Josh Campbell that he was gay, that he'd always been gay, and that no one else had ever made him feel the way he felt looking at Josh. That would kill even their tenuous long-distance friendship dead right there. No hope in hell of getting past it with their history.
“Look, Josh. You'll be fine. You can cope for a week, I'm sure. I have a lot to do here with work and all. I'm sorry.”
Josh looked at him, slowly drinking his beer. Trey saw his friend's eyes go dull and disappointed. “Okay, of course you're right. I'll figure something out. Maybe hire one of the locals. I just thought it would be fun, you and me. It was a dumb idea.”
“No, man, it wasn't dumb. I just... I can't right now.”
Josh gave him that familiar, crooked shrug. “Oblivious then. Assuming I could just walk into your life after eight years and expect you to drop everything for me, like we were still best friends.” He sat back in his chair, picked up a cookie, and bit into it decisively. “Mm. At least these are still good,” he mumbled around the crumbs. “So, I wanted to take a break between the flight and driving out there anyway. I've got some time. Tell me about your nursing home project, the one you were obsessing over. How did it go? Did you figure out how to get your peeping-Tom sensors to tell you when Grandma's shower has been too long?”
“Hey, it's valuable stuff. If we can catch even one senior with a health crisis through our monitoring system...”
“I know. I really am interested. It was just the image of you recording octogenarians in the bathroom.” Josh kicked his ankle. “We've barely even IM'd in ages. I figured maybe you'd developed a new kink.”
“Senior citizens? Um, no.” You don't want to know about my real kinks.
They chatted casually for the next half hour, about things that hadn't made it into emails. Trey complained about the fact that the sensor manufacturers he worked with all seemed to be based in boring cities like Pittsburgh. Josh talked about how no one else in the lab seemed to clean up after their damned selves and how it was always the most expensive culture ingredients that had the shortest shelf life. They both bitched about traffic and long commutes. Trey won that one just by virtue of living in LA, where ten miles could take an hour, if they were the wrong ten miles. He made it sound amusing, watching Josh's face.
“I haven't forgotten,” Josh said. “Remember the time the school had that field trip to the MOCA and the bus got so stuck in traffic they had to give it up? Not that any of us was devastated that we didn't get to spend the day with contemporary art.”
“I remember.” Three hours stuck on the bus, slouched in the seat next to Josh, vividly aware of their bare sweaty thighs side-by-side on the sticky vinyl... all his memories seemed to be filtered though a haze of Josh. It was a fucked up kind of pain and pleasure to hear them dragged to light in this new deeper Josh-voice. He shifted restlessly.
“Hey, want to see the upstairs floors I refinished? That was a hell of a job.” No more reminiscing.
Trey liked his place. It was just a rental, but the landlord was easygoing and after three years Trey had it pretty much fixed up, with colorful walls, the stained carpet taken up to expose wood floors that he'd finished on his own time, the heavy drapes replaced with light fabric shades. Trey skipped the bedroom. Not only didn't he want Josh standing next to his bed, but the pictures on the walls, although artistic, would leave no need to verbally come out of the closet.
They ended up in the front entry. Now that Josh was thinking about leaving, Trey suddenly desperately wanted to prolong the visit. He said, “How about dinner? It's past four now. Do you want to stick around for an hour or two, maybe go to Grady's Bar and Grill?” Josh had loved Grady's BBQ ribs, back when he lived here. It had been a rare treat, since they'd been too young to set foot in the place. Sometimes Trey's dad had brought a batch home for takeout.
Josh looked tempted but then shook his head. “I shouldn't. I haven't been to Aunt Julie's new place since they bought it. I'd really rather make the drive in the daylight.”
“Okay.” It was for the best. Really it was.
Josh looked at Trey for a minute, his eyes dark and a little sad. “So can I maybe stop by when the week's over? See you before I hop back on the plane and go home?”
“Christ.” A sad Josh just hit Trey where he lived, even after all this time. Trey wanted to hug him and didn't dare. “Of course. I'd be sorry if you didn't. You know I'd like to help you out with your aunt and uncle's place. I just can't.”
“It's okay. No worries.” He held out a hand.
Trey took it slowly. He was freaking shaking hands with Josh, like they were business acquaintances. He let go of their grip and stepped back.
“Come on out next weekend, maybe, if you want to see the store.” Josh gave Trey a wry smile. “And the goats and the Josh-eating pony. You're welcome any time. It's only a couple of hours away. I'll email you directions.”
And then he was gone.
Trey wandered back into the suddenly-empty kitchen. Damn the man. How dare Josh come walking back into his life with his grin and his energy, and the familiar smell of his skin when Trey hugged him, and the way he moved so balanced and easy... How dare he drop by for one measly hour and suddenly make the rest of Trey's life feel pointless and empty?
Trey picked the empty plate and the beer bottles off the table and stuck them in the sink. There were still a dozen cookies on the tray.
He'd eaten five of them, standing and staring out the kitchen window, before he realized what he was doing. Shit. He got a Tupperware and put the rest away before he could finish the lot. Unlike Josh, he had to work to keep the weight off. He was proud of his body and he wasn't going to mess that up just because...
Exercise. Exercise would be good.
****
I just sent it off to the editing crew (and immediately noticed two more typos- aargh. But I can fix them at the proofreading.) Anyway, I also posted a little snippet of the beginning of this 47,300 word story on the group and I thought I'd put it here too. This one should also be available for download when it releases (probably sometime in July.)
I hope you like this one too (although I'm not hoping to match the amazing reception Into Deep Waters has received.)
Photo description: Two dark-haired young men share a playful moment beside the ocean, framed against a backdrop of waves crashing on a rocky shore. Both men are laughing, wet and tanned, wearing only Speedos. The slimmer man reaches forward to snag the waistband of his friend's swim trunks, pulling them back in a way that exposes part of the other man's taut, rounded ass. The more muscular man reaches back with a hand planted on his friend's close-cropped head, shoving him away.
Dear Author,
It seems like we've known one another for ever, but he doesn't really know me at all. He doesn't know I'm gay and I'm really scared what will happen when he finds out. Especially when he finds out that I don't want to be just friends anymore.
.
****Chapter 1
The doorbell rang as Trey was lifting a batch of cookies out of the oven. He jumped and caught at the cookie sheet with his unprotected free hand as it tipped. Ouch! Fuck! He set the tray on the stovetop, pushed the oven shut with his knee, and slammed on the cold water in the sink for his burned fingers. Damn, that hurt! He tossed the potholder on the counter and let the blessed coolness sluice over his reddened fingertips
The bell rang again, longer. Whoever was out there was getting impatient. Trey sighed, turned off the water, and headed for the front hallway. The tip of his thumb throbbed and he absently stuck it in his mouth as he pulled the door open. And then just about bit it off.
Josh. On his front porch. Grinning at him with that wide, little-boy grin as if it hadn't been eight years since they'd last met. As if Trey hadn't done everything in his power to keep it that way.
There was laughter in Josh's grey eyes. “Hey, Trey, still sucking your thumb?”
Trey yanked his hand out of his mouth. For a moment he fought the impulse to slam the door shut – to just pretend he hadn't opened it and rewind to that last moment before the bell rang, when the worst thing that had happened today was a burned thumb. Not possible. He coughed and found his voice.
“Josh! You?” Jesus, that was smooth. Josh's grin was fading, and Trey realized he was standing planted in his own doorway, staring at Josh like he was some kind of alien. “I mean, wow, come on in! So... what brings you to my neck of the woods?” Without warning me first. Trey stepped back, pulling the door wide, and Josh came inside, brushing past him, the grin restored.
“You mean you don't think I came just to catch up on old times?”
“Yeah, right, you spent good money on a plane ticket just for that.” Suddenly Trey didn't care. It was Josh, here, in his house, after all these years. Trey grabbed Josh in a quick rough hug, and Josh pounded his back and finished up with a noogie, the years falling away.
“It's not the first time I've been back in town, you know. You've just never been around. You travel too damned much, and never out my way either.”
Deliberately. Trey did have some traveling to do for his job, but the panic with which he'd lined up a trip every time Josh announced an impending visit had nothing to do with the urgency of work. And everything to do with this man whom Trey'd had a hopeless crush on for years. Who, judging by the pounding of Trey's heart and the way he could hardly breathe for the sheer presence of the man, he still had a crush on. They were twenty-five instead of seventeen, and of Trey's half dozen boyfriends in the last eight years, a couple had been really nice guys, but apparently it didn't matter. It was still Josh Campbell who could make him crazy just by walking in his front door.
“Yeah, that's the job,” he lied. “But you're here now. Come on and sit down. We'll grab a couple of beers. You can tell me what's up with you.”
“Sure.” Josh sniffed the air. “Wow, what's that I smell? Don't tell me you still make those chocolate-chip orange-peel cookies?”
“Want one?” Trey led the way toward the kitchen, wondering what weird coincidence had made him bake Josh's favorite on the day he showed up at the door.
“One?” Josh laughed, deeper and richer than Trey remembered. “What makes you think I want just one?”
“The fact that you're still just as skinny as you were in high-school?” Josh wasn't skinny. He had a strong lean build under his T-shirt and cutoffs. His dark hair was cut shorter than it used to be back in school, he had more hair on his arms and legs, and better muscle definition in his calves and arms. And thighs. Where Trey hadn't been looking. Really. “Sit down at the table, I'll grab the brews.”
Trey stuck his head in the fridge, pretending to choose between Corona and Dos Equis, to give himself time to cool down. He heard Josh shove a chair back and sit at the kitchen table. Trey grabbed two Dos Equis darks and turned around. Josh was sprawled at ease in the bigger chair, legs akimbo, elbows on the wooden arms, grinning at him.
“Jesus,” Josh said happily. “I'm finally here. You look great. I've missed you, all these years. I know we email and all, but I've really missed just talking to you. I'll have to buy a new laptop with a fucking web cam so we can Skype from now on. To hell with the cost.”
Trey forced a laugh. “Wow, I never thought I'd hear you say that. Aren't you the guy who still uses scotch tape for band-aids like your dad taught you to?”
“I do not!” Josh sobered a little as Trey reached out to hand over his beer. He took the cold bottle from Trey's fingers, gave him a little salute with it, and then took a long pull with his dark eyes fixed on Trey's. “I missed you,” he repeated more softly.
Trey turned away, staring out the window. Every part of him was reacting to Josh like iron filings to a magnet. Josh's voice, Josh's eyes. It was too fucking dangerous. There was a good reason he'd tried so hard to avoid this. He leaned his hips against the counter so Josh couldn't see the happy reaction of his treacherous body. “I missed you too,” Trey said lightly. “No one here is likely to repeatedly hold me down and scrub mud in my hair.”
“I only did that once.” Josh's tone was mock-indignation.
“Twice. At least.”
Josh laughed. “God. This feels like coming home. I have friends in Connecticut, but no one like you. You have to come visit me there soon. I'll show you around, introduce you to everyone.”
Including Stephanie? No, that had been college. Maybe Danielle? Or was Linda the latest? Trey couldn't keep track of Josh's girlfriends. He didn't want to. “Sure. Sometime. So what does bring you back to LA this time?”
“Besides a craving for your cookies? Which you haven't offered me yet?”
Trey's libido tried to make something suggestive out of that, but he beat it back. He grabbed a plate, put a half-dozen of the still warm cookies on it and slapped it down on the table in front of Josh. “Yeah. Besides that.”
Josh took a big bite and grinned at Trey with melted chocolate on his lip. “I need your help. It's for Aunt Julie and Uncle Ted.”
“Are they okay?” Trey didn't think he'd be grinning like that if there was a serious problem. Josh's aunt and uncle had been there for him through some difficult times, and he adored them.
“They're fine. They opened that antique store Aunt Julie always wanted in Craneshore.”
“And...?” Trey pulled out his own chair and sat, sliding under the concealment of the table and not looking at Josh, not at his sparkling eyes, not at his chocolate-smeared mouth.
“This weekend is their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Uncle Ted bought them tickets for a one-week luxury cruise with all the trimmings. The shop assistant was supposed to run the place. But yesterday, not twelve hours after they sailed, the guy got in a serious car accident. He's going to be in hospital for weeks. Aunt Julie called me in a panic, begging me to go watch the place until they could arrange to get back. Uncle Ted called me ten minutes later begging me to call Aunt Julie back and offer to watch the place for the whole week, so her dream trip wouldn't have to be cut short.”
“What did you say?” As if Trey had any doubts. Josh would do anything for Aunt Julie.
“I said yes, of course. I had vacation saved up and this isn't a busy time for us. Summer session is slow and half the profs are off for the Fourth anyway. The lab is coasting right now. I can take a week off for Aunt Julie”
“So I still don't see where I come in.” Other than living close enough for Josh to show up on his doorstep for a visit and in ten seconds wreck eight years of hard-won indifference.
Josh leaned toward Trey and gave him the big, pleading eyes that had gotten Trey in trouble so many times. “Please, Trey, you have to help me. I can't do it by myself. There's the store, with customers and selling things that I have no clue what they even are, and it's the holiday weekend so they'll be busy. Then they have a freaking hobby farm, even bigger than the old one. They have a big vegetable garden and chickens and goats for chrissake. And a pony that has hated me for years. C'mon Trey. I need you.”
Crap. No. “I can't. I... I can't get away right now.”
“Please? Last week you told me your boss was threatening to take away your accrued vacation if you didn't take some of it. You said things were slow. It's just for a week.”
Trey cursed himself. Damn his big mouth. “Something has come up.” Like my dick. “I really can't.”
Josh stared at him with hurt surprise. Trey was surprised too. When had he ever had the strength to say no to Josh when he begged for something? Not since they were about thirteen anyway. But he had to. Because Trey knew that if he spent a week with Josh now, he would tell him. He would admit to Josh Campbell that he was gay, that he'd always been gay, and that no one else had ever made him feel the way he felt looking at Josh. That would kill even their tenuous long-distance friendship dead right there. No hope in hell of getting past it with their history.
“Look, Josh. You'll be fine. You can cope for a week, I'm sure. I have a lot to do here with work and all. I'm sorry.”
Josh looked at him, slowly drinking his beer. Trey saw his friend's eyes go dull and disappointed. “Okay, of course you're right. I'll figure something out. Maybe hire one of the locals. I just thought it would be fun, you and me. It was a dumb idea.”
“No, man, it wasn't dumb. I just... I can't right now.”
Josh gave him that familiar, crooked shrug. “Oblivious then. Assuming I could just walk into your life after eight years and expect you to drop everything for me, like we were still best friends.” He sat back in his chair, picked up a cookie, and bit into it decisively. “Mm. At least these are still good,” he mumbled around the crumbs. “So, I wanted to take a break between the flight and driving out there anyway. I've got some time. Tell me about your nursing home project, the one you were obsessing over. How did it go? Did you figure out how to get your peeping-Tom sensors to tell you when Grandma's shower has been too long?”
“Hey, it's valuable stuff. If we can catch even one senior with a health crisis through our monitoring system...”
“I know. I really am interested. It was just the image of you recording octogenarians in the bathroom.” Josh kicked his ankle. “We've barely even IM'd in ages. I figured maybe you'd developed a new kink.”
“Senior citizens? Um, no.” You don't want to know about my real kinks.
They chatted casually for the next half hour, about things that hadn't made it into emails. Trey complained about the fact that the sensor manufacturers he worked with all seemed to be based in boring cities like Pittsburgh. Josh talked about how no one else in the lab seemed to clean up after their damned selves and how it was always the most expensive culture ingredients that had the shortest shelf life. They both bitched about traffic and long commutes. Trey won that one just by virtue of living in LA, where ten miles could take an hour, if they were the wrong ten miles. He made it sound amusing, watching Josh's face.
“I haven't forgotten,” Josh said. “Remember the time the school had that field trip to the MOCA and the bus got so stuck in traffic they had to give it up? Not that any of us was devastated that we didn't get to spend the day with contemporary art.”
“I remember.” Three hours stuck on the bus, slouched in the seat next to Josh, vividly aware of their bare sweaty thighs side-by-side on the sticky vinyl... all his memories seemed to be filtered though a haze of Josh. It was a fucked up kind of pain and pleasure to hear them dragged to light in this new deeper Josh-voice. He shifted restlessly.
“Hey, want to see the upstairs floors I refinished? That was a hell of a job.” No more reminiscing.
Trey liked his place. It was just a rental, but the landlord was easygoing and after three years Trey had it pretty much fixed up, with colorful walls, the stained carpet taken up to expose wood floors that he'd finished on his own time, the heavy drapes replaced with light fabric shades. Trey skipped the bedroom. Not only didn't he want Josh standing next to his bed, but the pictures on the walls, although artistic, would leave no need to verbally come out of the closet.
They ended up in the front entry. Now that Josh was thinking about leaving, Trey suddenly desperately wanted to prolong the visit. He said, “How about dinner? It's past four now. Do you want to stick around for an hour or two, maybe go to Grady's Bar and Grill?” Josh had loved Grady's BBQ ribs, back when he lived here. It had been a rare treat, since they'd been too young to set foot in the place. Sometimes Trey's dad had brought a batch home for takeout.
Josh looked tempted but then shook his head. “I shouldn't. I haven't been to Aunt Julie's new place since they bought it. I'd really rather make the drive in the daylight.”
“Okay.” It was for the best. Really it was.
Josh looked at Trey for a minute, his eyes dark and a little sad. “So can I maybe stop by when the week's over? See you before I hop back on the plane and go home?”
“Christ.” A sad Josh just hit Trey where he lived, even after all this time. Trey wanted to hug him and didn't dare. “Of course. I'd be sorry if you didn't. You know I'd like to help you out with your aunt and uncle's place. I just can't.”
“It's okay. No worries.” He held out a hand.
Trey took it slowly. He was freaking shaking hands with Josh, like they were business acquaintances. He let go of their grip and stepped back.
“Come on out next weekend, maybe, if you want to see the store.” Josh gave Trey a wry smile. “And the goats and the Josh-eating pony. You're welcome any time. It's only a couple of hours away. I'll email you directions.”
And then he was gone.
Trey wandered back into the suddenly-empty kitchen. Damn the man. How dare Josh come walking back into his life with his grin and his energy, and the familiar smell of his skin when Trey hugged him, and the way he moved so balanced and easy... How dare he drop by for one measly hour and suddenly make the rest of Trey's life feel pointless and empty?
Trey picked the empty plate and the beer bottles off the table and stuck them in the sink. There were still a dozen cookies on the tray.
He'd eaten five of them, standing and staring out the kitchen window, before he realized what he was doing. Shit. He got a Tupperware and put the rest away before he could finish the lot. Unlike Josh, he had to work to keep the weight off. He was proud of his body and he wasn't going to mess that up just because...
Exercise. Exercise would be good.
****
Published on May 31, 2012 12:17
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Jess
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May 31, 2012 07:55PM

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You and me both - when I see it in a different format they seem to be easier to find - I've noticed that before; even a font change sometimes does it. Luckily I have one more shot at it. We caught most of the little buggers though. Thanks again for the beta.