Hello!

Hello again to my friends near and far!

I hope you have been well.

Once again, my faith has been sorely tested. Being the Fall season, as usual, I have been flaring up something terrible. On top of that, my Fall allergies have been severe. The pain was so horrific, I was close to tears. The fatigue was so debilitating, I felt like a dishrag. I could only get up to do what was necessary.

You know, when my mother was alive, even on my worst days, I knew I was worth something. She was old, frail, and unable to do a o lot of things for herself. She needed me, giving me a purpose for living. I cooked for her, I made she she kept clean, I made sure she took her meds, and I took her to all of her appointments. We drank morning coffee together, and we talked about it, “all.” All that changed when she died three and a half years ago.

I am a giver. I am also a very loving person, and I need to give love. I am a caretaker, and when I am in the kind of shape I have been in the last couple of weeks, I wonder what my purpose is in life. I don’t always feel like my life has a point, and it is a very hard pill to swallow; I suppose it is for everyone.

Because of the a fore mentioned, I had no idea what I was going to write about this week. Last week, I wrote about how I looked at my flares differently, and how I knew they would pass as they always had. For the most part, I still do, it’s just when it goes on and on and things are SO bad for SO long, it is easy to forget. When I am engulfed in such pain, the devil wins. Well, no, he doesn’t. I sorely need to remember his victories are not only hollow, but temporary. Once again, God lifted me out of that pain, and things are getting better again. He put it on my heart to turn off the TV, turn on Calm Meditation Radio, and meditate.

All that pain got me to thinking about how much more relaxed I was after I did, and how much better I felt mentally. I found myself not worrying about things quite as much. Meditation actually changes mental outlook. It brings positivity to light, and life doesn’t seem as bad.

I also sleep better. Twenty minutes of deep meditation is equal to three hours of sleep. That may seem like it’s hard to believe, but it is true. I might not believe it myself if I had never started meditating. I did it years ago, and found it did me a lot of good. I’m so glad God put it on my heart to do it again.

Speaking of which, it’s about time to do it again. So, these are the thoughts I have for you today.

Have a wonderful week!
Beckie.

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