Tension

My childhood home was filled with chaos and violence. As a result, tension became my close friend. I was used to it subliminally.

When I became free of living in that hellhole I thought I could leave it all behind and create a new, better life for myself, free of tension. Boy was I wrong! I had this innate ability to be attracted to people who created chaos. It was like a tractor beam. When I was married, one day I came to the realization that I had recreated what I was desperately trying to escape from. In that moment I realized the common denominator was me and I had to do something about it. So, I began working on myself.

Looking inside myself exposed why I made the choices I made. Then I went to work to modify my thinking which led to better outcomes. It wasn’t easy working through this stuff, and it took time, but it was worth it.

Today I’m peaceful, content, and still ambitious as hell. Do I miss the chaos? In a word, no…