Take Me to the Aquarium and Call Me Pretty
If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll know that for about ten years, I spent a great deal of time on the road as an educational consultant. It was a job that I deeply loved and had an absolute blast. It gave me a chance to spread a positive message and make a difference. At the same time, it afforded me the opportunity to see the country and visit places I never would have thought to go to on my own.
The job did have its ups and downs for sure but I really did love it and, at times, miss it. (LISTEN TO: Silent Stages: Josh’s Exit From Educational Speaking)
One of the things I truly loved to do when I was traveling was visiting different zoos and aquariums. I’ve always loved animals, and zoos and aquariums are my happy place. There’s a sense of tranquility that washes over me as I watch fish glide gracefully through the water or observe animals in their carefully crafted habitats. It’s a reminder of the incredible diversity and beauty of life on our planet. Honestly, I could spend all day just soaking it all in.
Back in June, a friend invited me along as a plus one to a wedding in Denver and I thought, “why not?” It was not only a chance to get away for a weekend, but also pay a visit to my sister who lived in Colorado Springs. That, and I absolutely love both the Denver Aquarium and the Denver Zoo. So, despite having no idea who the bride and groom were, I agreed to go.
I will be honest, I turn into an absolute nerd upon entering any zoological establishment. My time as an educational volunteer at the New England Aquarium has gifted me with an obscene amount of knowledge that I have no choice but to share with anyone within earshot. Mating habits of Lobsters? Immortal jellyfish? Why are dolphins assholes? You’re going to hear all about it.
My two absolute favorite things about the Denver Aquarium are the “flash flood” exhibit which simulates the extreme forces of a flash flood and is amazing to watch, and the fact that there are two tigers in the aquarium.
You read that right. They have tigers.
Who doesn’t love an aquarium that has tigers? Also chonky snapping turtles.
If I had the energy of a young person, I would have created a TikTok that rated the chonkiness of different animals in the aquarium but I don’t fully understand TikTok and I don’t have the attention span for making them.
The moral of the story is, I absolutely loved spending time in the aquarium. If anyone ever wants to spend time listening to me spew random ocean animal facts to them, just let me know. I’m game to go stare at some fish.
Actually that might be my new litmus test. Survive a date with me at a zoo or an aquarium and that’s how I know it’s going to last. Would that be a fun date? Shockingly, I’ve never had a date at an aquarium.
I just had a random memory pop into my head. Once, when I was working at the aquarium in Boston, I met this devastatingly handsome Australian guy on the T (Boston’s subway) and flirted it up hard, letting him know I worked at the aquarium. I, rather boldly, gave him my number and invited him to come visit me at work- WHICH HE DID.
Absolutely nothing came of it because my boldness ended there.
One of the many reasons why I don’t ask people out anymore, because it never goes well.
Moral of the story is, if you want to take me on a date, invite me to an aquarium… I guess.
I don’t know.
I’m terrible at this.
