What if you and the story just aren’t connecting?

Speaking with a friend and fellow writer, I’ve finally summed up my issue with my writing at the moment. Connection. Sometimes, a story is great. It works. Or it has narrative promise, strong characters and fits the genre and industry well. But sometimes, you still don’t connect with the story yourself. This is a problem because you may feel apathy towards the story. You may not want to do the editing needed to make it stronger. You may not want to spend time with it. And that’s okay, but it is hard to accept.

What do you do in that situation? I’m still working on that. But first…

Why you may not connect with your story

Personally, I have had many story ideas lately. Stories that could work narratively or thematically. Stories that have excited me and I’ve created worlds and magic systems for them. But sometimes, even when writing to the end of the first draft at 85k+ words, it still isn’t the right story.

It could be that the story isn’t one you’re meant to tell right now.

A story that’s not meant for you at all.

A story that doesn’t excite you as much as you thought it would.

A story that you need more time to connect deeper with.

A story that works on some levels for you, but not others.

A story with themes or characters that you don’t connect with right now.

And it could also be you: you’re not ready, willing, or in the right place, etc.

There are many reasons why you may lack that spark with a story. Think of your creative works as dating. Some projects, like some people, will not be right for you, even if you initially liked them. Some projects, like people, will impress and excite you, at first, only for the spark to fade. And some projects, like the rare person, will come along and that connection will last. That magic, that love, will continue to bloom.

That’s what I’m waiting for and seeking.

What to do when you’re not connecting with your story

For now, I am trying out speed dating! Writing faster, simpler drafts or working on short stories to keep up the habit and get through ideas without putting too much energy into long drafts, only to lose connection as I go. I don’t want to stop writing altogether. You have to be in the creativity, just like you need to be open to dating, before “the one” comes along!

Of course, like with a relationship, there are ways to try to reconnect or deepen the connection that you may want to try with your story.

Here are some ideas to help you connect with your story again:

Spend time getting to know your characters betterAsk yourself what you want from a story right now, then see if your current W.I.P ticks those boxes and see if you can add/shift some things to suit this listTake a break from your W.I.P. to see if you miss it!Revisit why you started this story in the first place; what originally excited you about itMake a list of the things you’ve enjoyed in the books you’ve read and the films and TV shows you’ve watched, and then see if your story has these elements; adjust accordinglyInterview your characters as if they were real people and don’t force the answers, let them come through naturallyWrite short stories/reflections/pieces set in your story world, either following the same characters or other ones; this deepens the world and frees you up to explore without consequence

Some things I’m considering is: genre, drafting process, and voice. Am I writing the genre I truly want to write? Is the setting working for me? Am I drafting too longhand, when I need to go shorter and more simple at first? Am I imitating other voices instead of uncovering and enjoying my own?

Creativity should be about playfulness. Experimentation and daring. If something isn’t working, try something else! It’s that simple, yet we love to complicate things.

I am reminding myself that you can’t always connect as deeply with a story as you’d like. Sometimes, that connection fades and comes back later. Sometimes, it’s just not meant to be. Write anyway. Write something new. Write what feels good and right. Don’t waste too much time on projects that haven’t felt good for a long time – usually, that’s a sign that something isn’t right.

Good luck and happy writing this summer!

Sincerely,

S. xx