Why I Was Wrong to Tell My Daughter to Always Be Kind

“She is awful! I can’t believe she told Becky she didn’t want to work together. That’s so mean!”

I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and when I hear this type of comment from teens I’m counseling, I recall a situation twenty years ago that still makes me ponder on the concept of “being kind.”

I had been so self-righteous teaching my own kiddos “to be kind” and “don’t be mean.” What’s wrong with that? But I didn’t consider other subliminal lessons being taught.

Today, bright po...