Chained Soul – Part Twenty-Six
Welcome back to Chained Soul, my new serialised novel that I’m releasing right here on my blog, as well as on Tapas and Wattpad. Quick warning: this series does contain strong language, so if that’s not your thing, you’re free to skip this one!
Check out Part One, including a synopsis for the whole series, here!
If you missed Part Twenty-Five, you can read that here!
Day Twenty-SixPatient Evaluation Form – Pre-Assessment
Patient Number: 0619
Patient Name: Robin Stephens
Question One: Would You Describe Your Mood Over The Last Week As Stable?
Yes.
Question Two: Have You Been Generally Feeling More Positive Emotions Or Negative Emotions?
Positive emotions.
Question Three: When Thinking Of The Word ‘Society’, How Do You Feel?
Happy.
Question Four: When Thinking Of The Word ‘Abnormal’, How Do You Feel?
Disgusted.
Question Five: Please Describe One Benefit Of A Privilege You Have Received During Your Time Here, And How It Has Improved Your Recovery
Access to the e-mail system allowed me to gradually re-accustom myself to normal communication and societal expectations.
Question Six: Please Describe A Negative Occurrence During Your Time Here, And What You Have Learned From It
Another patient acted violently in the group session room before the session started. I learned that acting out is negative, and leads to consequences for everyone, since the group session was unable to go ahead.
Question Seven: What Have You Missed Most During Your Time Here?
Seeing my family.
Question Eight: Do You Understand Why Your Treatment Here Occurred?
Yes.
Question Nine: Do You Feel That You Have Recovered Significantly During Your Time Here?
Yes.
Question Ten: Do You Consent To Undergoing The Assessment Process?
Yes.
Brief Final Report – Nominated Psychological Care Coordinator
Patient Number: 0619
Patient Name: Robin Stephens
Staff Number: 0012
Staff Name: Kathy Hume
Mental Health Notes:
Robin has shown remarkable improvement during time in facility. Mood is much more stable and Robin tends to present positively and politely. No longer reports delusions and no longer experiences emotional spikes leading to violent outbursts.
Medication Notes:
Robin has complied with medication treatment. Improvements in energy levels and mood have coincided with medication treatment.
Social Notes:
Robin shows no signs of return to delusions despite physical condition. Unfortunately, Robin has not been able to attend group sessions (see incident report no. 309), but I supplemented social treatment with additional one-on-one sessions.
Opinion Given For Assessment: Positive
Re-Introduction Category: C (Physical)
Signed: Kathy Hume
In case you couldn’t guess, I didn’t mean a single fucking bit of what I wrote in that questionnaire. Bit of a shame, really. It’s kinda cathartic to just get out all of my emotions in those things, knowing that someone, somewhere has to read it. Even if it’s just the psychologist lady – Kathy. It feels weird knowing her name. Like, it felt weird to not know her name, but now that I know it, it feels like I’ve learned some sort of horrible secret that’s gonna get someone killed or something.
Anyway, yeah, not my answers. Kathy coached me through the whole thing. At least it didn’t take much brain power, I suppose. She said that if I wrote all of that down, then they’d be guaranteed to take me for the assessment, pretty much. Well. She kinda said that.
She said a load of medical mumbo-jumbo and ‘professionalism’ stuff, and then she said that those were the right answers for them to let someone do the weird assessment that I still don’t know anything about. Then she said she hoped that it wasn’t too late, which was really fucking inspiring of her, and then she said it’d all probably be okay. Then she just kept going on about how I didn’t want to stay here when the changes happened, like she did before.
I don’t know. I guess I’ve got no choice other than to trust her, or at least believe her. I mean, what else can I do? She’s saying she’ll get me out of here, and that’s all I want. I want to be in my own room, in my own home, and have food that’s actually edible. I wanna go outside whenever the fuck I want.
That’s the first thing I’m gonna do. I’m gonna take a long, long walk, through some trees or some shit like that, and just breathe and relax finally. Or take a shower. A shower might be a better idea for what to do first, to be fair. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so grotty in my life.
And now, because she’s given me some hope of getting out of here, I’m getting all antsy. I can’t sit still. I keep getting up and pacing around, just waiting for a knock on the door or something. When Kathy left, she just said to be patient. She didn’t even give me a timeframe, just that things would happen ‘soon’ if they were gonna happen at all.
I fucking hope I don’t get stuck in here. I hope Helen isn’t stuck in here. She might be all paranoid and thinking that she’s gonna die in here, but I bet everyone’ll get out eventually. If they’re treating everyone then that must mean that there’s an end to the treatment, right? Otherwise they’d be shit doctors and they’d get shut down. Though I suppose they used to keep people in asylums for ages and just never let them go.
Shit, I hope this isn’t like that.
I mean, at least it seems like Kathy’s given it her best shot. That report was probably a lot more glowing than I deserve, if I’m being honest. I know that I’ve been nothing but a pain since I’ve been here, but at least I haven’t attacked anyone or anything. I could have been a lot worse.
Maybe they’ll interview me after I get out. Some news channel might want to know about the treatment, get an insider look. Won’t I be a disappointment? Yeah, sorry dude, I don’t know why the fuck I was in there or what the fuck they were doing. I was mostly bored and just took the pills they gave me – and I don’t even know for sure what they were, either.
Unless the assessment makes me remember stuff. Maybe they’ll just plug me into a computer and give me all my memories back, just like transferring a folder over. That’d be fucked.
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