Feeling Like A Writer Again

If you asked me to define what it means to be a writer, I don't know that I would be able to come up with a firm definition. It would likely involve writing in some way, but I've never really been one for labels and categorization. But, like a few other words in the English language, I know it when I see it. Or--to be specific in my own case--know it when I feel it.

For the last year and a bit, I haven't felt like a writer. And not just because I didn't publish anything, but because I didn't enjoy it. I was burned out and tired... the spark was gone.

Well, the spark is back! I feel momentum again, and I don't want to stop working. I haven't felt like this in a long time, and it's almost scary. I know that sounds weird, but after the last few years, optimism has felt like hubris, swiftly punished and harder to build back up again every time.

What's changed? Progress! My new book has made it all the way to beta!

That's right! True to my word, I said I wouldn't bring up any new projects until it was in beta, and now that it is, I have to stop myself from telling you everything.

Here's what I can say:

Firstly, The response has been overwhelmingly positive, and exactly what I needed to remember that perhaps maybe I still know how to do this. The feeling of accomplishment has buoyed me immensely, and I just want to write more and more in this new universe I've created.

New universe, you say? Yes! This new book is the first in an entirely new series, in a new genre for me. It has many elements from my other stories, some more familiar than others, but altogether something new and different. (Rest assured though, one of the first pieces of feedback I got was that it definitely feels like a Cameron Darrow book!) It has magic and fantastical creatures, and a setting that is... familiar, let's say, but still its own thing. Strong, three-dimensional women who quite fancy other women, deep character relationships between them, fighting the good fight, humor and fun dialogue, learning to get along, cross-cultural pollination, all things you've come to expect (and I'm told you like) about my books.

I want to save details for a separate announcement post, but I have been hard at work editing and rewriting it, and I am champing at the bit to get it back so I can get back to work on it. Staying away has been the hardest part! Got to let it marinate a bit. Hopefully, that post is coming sooner than later!

I cannot thank you for your patience while I work through things. I hope you find the result worth it. It has been so hard, and taken so much work, to get to this point that I was genuinely hesitant to say anything, but I wanted to let you know--and perhaps remind myself--that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

For the first time in a long time, I'm excited about writing again. I love working on this story, I love these characters, and I love the possibilities of the blank page and the imagination again.

Not only do I want to write again, I need to, and I can't think of a better definition than that.