“What horrors will be performed with this axe? This hose? This dagger? This gun? This sword? All the implements necessary to make this the ultimate in adult horror films.”

46. The Long Weekend – Gilly MacMillan

Dark Fell Barn sounds just totally innocuous as a place to have a creepy and terrible girls’ weekend, doesn’t it? I mean, I know “fell” here means essentially a big hill, but there is totally a twisted ankle coming and a lack of cell service that leads to some basic wine-drunk chaos on a rainy night in Northern England. And that’s just the girls’ night part with the threatening note tagging along in the champagne and the unexpected gun. To be fair, the characters are not that distinct from each other and it’s when they get back home that the real twists and turns begin. Followed by yet more twists and also turns, but then more twist. I found the characters to be not that intriguing, obviously, I haven’t even mentioned any names. The Long Weekend was a quick enough read, but I did start to really hate the number of crosswise twists and dramatic turns for these people I barely knew or cared to understand and rolled my eyes quite a few times by the end.

 

They wandered in the dark and pelting rain around a place called “Dark Fell Barn” before all the kidnapping and murder plot parts? Horace thinks perhaps this could have just been called Bad Decisions in the North instead.