Extended WTEAW Tease

Currently editing about 120 pages I printed up to have something to do while I heal up.  Thought I'd share some!

A whole weekend to myself.

No more inevitable crises.

No more petty squabbles.

Every teenage dream, adolescent nightmare, and allthat happened in-between.

Just me and my ol’ stomping grounds.

Unchained.

Too hot for TV.

Bigger, longer…wait…nah, still six inches.  Uncut? Nope!  No elephant trunk covingthis boy’s pee-hole!

Consider the King Returned, Bitches!

Where the elf women at?!?

Ain’t any. Not outside of some randy collectable cards Russell Quilt keeps lockedup in his desk drawer.  Miss Fosterprobably ferreted them out and burned the smut by now.  No, Sweetie, don’t do it!  Fiona Flamecrotch is worthy fifty dollars!  Mrs. Quilt, rather.  Somehow my epic bachelor party with thestripper bus hadn’t derailed proceedings, so I suppose randy elf cards ain’tgonna lead to divorce neither.  Been overa year of newlywed bliss from how Quilt talks and scuttlebutt says they took along vacation a month back to try to sew their first little bundle of patchwork.  No word on if they succeeded or if randy elf cardswere used to help the process along.  I’mnot wearing those ears again, Russell!

I mean, even if elf women did exist, nottoo likely they’re letting my short ugly ass see that grade-AAA immortal elfcoochie anyway.

Dwarf women?

Fo’ sure with the dwarf women!

Not talking little dude kinda dwarf womenneither.  Talking the kind that’sstockier than Romanian shot-putters and hairier than any Armenian girl everexisted, even Khloe Kardashian.  Dwarfwomen, the original gold diggers!  Look atthe bushy beard on that one!  You see thebraided nipple hair tassels she got going? And that trunk!  Look how muscularand square it is!  Forget cushion forthe pushin’, give me ridges for the grippin’!