You Say You Want a (New Year’s) Resolution?

Oops.

It’s a New Year and I’ll admit I haven’t given the slightest bit of thought to an actual New Year’s Resolution. I have nothing against them, as those of you who have been around the Cold for a while undoubtedly know. I love to make them, I love to keep them, and I love to break them. All of these scenarios I consider a win-win.

My previous resolutions – even when broken – have been a resounding success. They’ve helped me make friends or make peace with losing one, improve my health, impose a much-needed policy of gratitude or optimism (perhaps they’re the same thing), and essentially perform some basic hygiene on my life.

I’ve tried every kind of New Year’s resolution imaginable. In years gone by, all drinkable alcohol has been banished from our house, for instance. To be honest that one didn’t live up to its promise: the mental clarity, the better sleep, the fact that we wouldn’t even miss it – ha! I think I’m a bit too temperate a personality for abstinence to really pack a punch. Other resolutions have been more successful; like vowing to accept all invitations extended to me in an effort to make friends and expand my circles, my life, my interests. That one was nothing short of big bang, and I’m still reaping the benefits of it four years on.

I think the reason why I haven’t come up with something to do this year, something to change, or at least to contemplate, wrestle with, muse upon, is that I got a head start on this self-improvement business back in the early fall, long before the actual New Year was even remotely in sight. Necessity is the mother of invention, after all, and I’ve been in great need, so I guess I couldn’t wait.

Got ahead of myself, like this gal.

Since resolutions mostly consist of changing habits – or attempting to change at least one habit – my habit revolution…maybe more of an evolution…started all those months ago during a creative stammer episode that was dragging me down, making me unproductive and generally poor company to be around. I felt depleted, both spiritually and mentally. Worn out, conflicted, lost. This feeling extended beyond my workday and manifested itself as a general malaise that I can only describe as a state of faithlessness, an uncomfortable embracing of fear. Fear of today, of tomorrow, of ten years from now. Fear of my actions, my inactions and of missed opportunities. At its core, it’s not an exaggeration to say that I was standing on the precipice of a crisis.

That’s a dangerous place to be. Especially since I didn’t realize just how down in the dumps I’d become until I actually started climbing out of my hole.

Thankfully, through a combination of dumb luck and support from those in my nucleus, as my science-minded brother likes to say, I was inspired to take action before this gathering storm really had the time and momentum to wreak some serious, category 5 damage. With a bit of nudging from those who know me best, I began a regimen I’ve documented pretty thoroughly here in the Cold, incorporating Julia Cameron’s artist’s bible, ​The Artist’s Way​, into my life, one directive at a time. Since making just a few basic, resolution-like changes, my creativity has started to flourish, and with it has come a sense of gratitude and hope that has spread like a contagion to other parts of my life.

I’ve been writing, brainstorming story ideas, book coaching a friend, reading fiction, cooking according to recipes well outside my wheelhouse, storyboarding new ideas, and even corralling my artsy daughter into helping me take a stab at developing a line of design-heavy, hella-stylish merchandise. As I’ve continued with my daily creative exercises, mostly articulated by Ms. Cameron, although I’ve added a couple of my own as well, my imagination has started to make a comeback. Once again, I find myself with more ideas than I can possibly implement, which is a good problem to have, I think.

But what I don’t have, as a result, is a New Year’s Resolution. In fact, all the ones I’ve come up with seem same old, same old, if you know what I mean.

I can think of a few things these folks might think about giving up.

That’s where you all come in. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to chime in with your ideas on some marvelous, creative, even off-the-wall New Year’s Resolutions – for me, for yourselves, for the world. In doing so, I ask that you tackle the primal, and don’t allow fear of the unorthodox to act as your governor. But please, none of this giving up chocolates or beer stuff. For one, chocolate should never be given up – not under any circumstances. As for beer, you should certainly give it up if it’s causing you problems, but it is worth noting that the oldest recipe ever discovered is for a nice, amber-colored ale. This kind of stuff matters to a historical junkie like me.

When conjuring a really good resolution, I’d like you to think about the widest, longest possible impact, too. Something that, even if seemingly small, will reverberate throughout the year – maybe throughout the course of a lifetime. I had a friend who once pledged not to give unsolicited advice, for instance. I thought it was such a great idea that I immediately incorporated it into my own life, and I believe that small, borrowed resolution has saved me from many unfortunate scenarios.

That’s the kind of thing we’re going for. And once I receive your suggestions, I’ll post as many of them as possible, pick one, tell you exactly why I’m picking that one, and keep you posted on my progress. I’ll be honest about it, too. Swear!

I also encourage you to do the same – that’s why I’m going to post a pick of your suggestions. To give you choices as well, and from some of the best idea generators I know (this means you).

If your mind is drawing a blank this year, I’d love to hear all about your previous New Year’s Resolutions. Why you chose them and what they meant to you. What impact, if any, they’ve had on your life.

This year I vow to be more like this queen.

By the way, it’s a New Year and there’s a new novel by comic thriller prosateur VJ Fitz Howard coming your way. Next of Kin is the fourth book in the Tami Vaduva series and it’s a killer! If you’re a fan of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum series or Carl Hiaasen’s adult novels, Pre-order your copy today!

WHEN THE MOST HIGHTLY DECORATED FEMALE COMBAT SOLDIER IN U.S. ARMY HISTORY SWORE TO DEFEND AMERICA AGAINST ALL ENEMIES FOREIGN AND DOMESTIC, SHE NEVER RECKONED THAT WOULD MEAN GOING TO WAR WITH HER OWN DADDY!

But that’s exactly what Tami Vaduva must do when, during a séance with her
deceased husbands, the three-time widow is told that she must resolve her
crippling “daddy issues” if she ever expects to keep a man—and keep him alive.

Thus begins Tami’s quest to track down, and confront, the man who begat and
abandoned her before she was born. Accompanied on her mission by prospective
husband number four—a virile, millionaire hillbilly—the pair embark upon a
mission that will take them to the infamous Pentecostal church in West Virginia
where Tami’s rattlesnake-handling daddy once preached, to the southern shores
of the Dead Sea, where old scores will be settled, and finally to a remote
mountain compound where her messianic, heavily-armed daddy leads a depraved
sex cult.