Electrif(r)ied

Sally and Mort are moving.No. Seriously. They bought that ranch they were looking atand are planning a move just after Christmas.Part of me tingles with anticipation at the thought.Imagine. A life without the constant worry at the back ofyour brain about what mischief Sally is getting into somewhere under the roofyou share.Okay, you’re right. Of course, I will still worry. It willjust be from a longer distance.And maybe one step removed.I have to admit I love the ranch. Space features large indescribing it: Large house. Large barns. Large pastures.Large trees surrounding the house and barns and pastures.I haven’t been there a lot. Peter and I have been planningour wedding so Sally and Mort have been traveling back and forth on their own—orwith Dad—supervising the ongoing renovations.Because of course, one must renovate to make a house one’sown.Right?Or maybe they’re just redoing everything in cast iron orplastic.Sally will be living there after all.Anyways, between their excitement, and Peter’s and mine, andMom and Dad’s over their anticipated next baby, there hasn’t been even aremotely unhappy face in our house for weeks!In fact, it’s hard to recallthe last moment we may have felt the least bit negative.Until today…You have to know that, when Sally celebrates, she c e l e br a t e s. The whole enchilada. Nothing stinted.And she is reallyanticipating moving into her ranch.So I know there will be celebratory…erm…stuff.A brass band. Maybe a parade.Fireworks.Okay, I’m exaggerating about the brass band and the parade.But the fireworks? Real.Ahem…Sally had a big box of them sitting between the beautifullittle storage shed near the house and the fence that ran along the closestpasture.A fence none of us realized was electrified.Something like this could only happen in movies.Or in Sally’s life.Sigh.Of course, this was the day that Peter and I decided tovisit and ooh and aah over the progress being made.Dad and Mort were over by that box of fireworks. Dad wasinvestigating them—seeing what they needed to be safely set off.He’s like that.Mort was playing with his new lighter.Because of course he would be playing with a lighter in the one spot in all of creation where it really wasn't the smart thing to do.Here is where I admit I have no idea why Mort has a newlighter. He doesn’t smoke. And neither does anyone in our family. I’m thinkingit has something to do with being on a ranch now and needing to be able to ‘liveoff the land’ at a moment’s notice.Anyways, he and Dad were talking while Dad investigated andMort…flipped.Then Dad went to stand up. And reached out, naturally, forthe top strand of that fence.That none of us realized was electrified.Till then.Dad is made of tough stuff—former marine and all that—but hewasn’t ready for the charge that shot through him.I swear his hair stood on end. He jumped and shook and beata rapid tattoo on the ground with his heels.And that’s when things really fell apart.Trying to get his balance, he reached out rather blindlyfor something to hold onto and again grabbed the wire.This time, his arms shot out.The one hit Mort right in the glasses.Then knocked the lighter from his hand.Said lighter then arched—with uncanny accuracy—straight intothe box of fireworks.The resultant fireworks show could be seen clear back inthe city.Or so I’m told.Dad and Mort barely escaped with their hides intact.The side of the shed is toast.And Sally is quite disappointed that she missed the wholething.Not one to leave things undone,I understand that she’s on her way into the city to procure more fireworks.I probably should warn you that, if our family canaccomplish that kind of damage without Sally, just imagine what will happenwith her present.May heaven smile on us all.
Use Your Words is a writing challenge!Each month, I exchange words with my friend and intrepid leader, Karen of Baking in a Tornado Neither of us knows what the other will do with her words.This month, Karen gave me: undone ~ recall ~ unhappy ~ glasses ~ tattooThank you, my friend!Now go see what Karen did with my words!BakingIn ATornado
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Published on December 15, 2023 06:30
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On the Border

Diane Stringam Tolley
Stories from the Stringam Family ranches from the 1800's through to today. ...more
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