If you can’t say anything nice…

One of the misunderstandings(?) I had with some (most?) members of the Canada Writes Facebook (CWF) group before they banned me was my critiques. Many members use the site to publish their poetry or passages from a WIP.

When I see work presented to the public, I assume the writer wants a response. I appreciate reviews and criticisms of my work. The ones I appreciate most are where a thoughtful reader has provided insightful suggestions on how to improve my stories – and they can always be improved. Glowing reviews that extoll my genius (not many of those) are flattering but do little to advance my craft. I assumed other writers wanted the same.

They don’t – or at least on CWF they didn’t. There was a consensus among the members that I was overly harsh when all the person who posted wanted was a “like” or a “love” to fulfill their ongoing fantasy. In other words, I was told if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all (and I thought I was doing them a favour).

How, you might ask, does someone improve at anything with that kind of attitude?

I was never rude and usually edited out the initial sarcasm, but my comments weren’t ambivalent and could sting depending on the thickness of your skin. I mean, who’s got time to try to figure out if it’s a compliment or a criticism? Are we not adults? Have we such fragile egos that one person’s opinion of our writing is going to devastate us, destroy our dream of being an overnight bestseller, or break our spirit beyond repair?

Apparently so.

I’d like my writing to be my one true thing. That means no compromises, no delusion, and being honest with myself and others (We’re talking writing here. In life I’m as duplicitous as anyone else, maybe more so).

So, here’s the dilemma.

Two writers have been very kind and generous regarding my writing specifically and my career generally. That’s not to say their magnanimity has increased my book sales. I’ve said thanks, but I thought I’d like to reciprocate – and review one of their books (you see where this is going?)

Their books are okay, but they’re not great, three stars, maybe four if I factor in they’re error-free and professionally produced – though both are likely the result of buying services from professionals.

I’d like to think when they read my review they’ll acknowledge my intent to make them an even better writer. I hope they’ll consider my constructive comments and suggestions on how their book and/or subsequent writing might be improved.

But I think they’ll be pissed ¬– sort of like being bit by the dog you just fed.

I used to think I had a responsibility to write and post an honest review of any book I’d read – to the author and readers. Now I’m wondering, what’s the point?

Ralph Waldo Emerson said: “A little integrity is better than any career.” I might have to rethink that – the integrity part.