Slaves of Rhythm
I giggled quite a lot when watching a recent episode from The Big Bang Theory - the famous sitcom on American television these days. Specifically on scenes where I see Sheldon - the quirky theoretical physicist with an obsessive compulsive disorder - vehemently opposing Indian food on Wednesday that happens to be a Thai food night. A creature of habit, he finds it very difficult to make these seemingly small changes. Later that night, a friend of mine suggested that I move to a new apartment - a suggestion I too quite vociferously shot down stating that I am way too comfortable the way my life has settled into its routine grind, and that a change would upset everything...
As I spoke those words, my mind wandered back to another incident from a few years back. It was on a chilly evening in Pittsburgh in 2004 that I recall this gentleman who claimed his powers in palmistry. A room-mate of my friend, he exclaimed loudly when he saw my hand (the third in the series of hands that he read that evening). He claimed that it was the most interesting hand he had ever read. Amongst the many other things he professed, one was that I would nt stay settled in one place for too long. That change would be an inevitable part of my destiny. That transformation would be constant and perennial.
The meory brought a smile to my face... Somewhat torn between my most certain destiny and my innate inertia to resist change, I pondered over my own acceptance of impending changes. And although I detest the idea of transitions from one to the other, from old to the new, I know in the heart of my hearts that I enjoy change. Unsettling as it may be during the time when it happens, the feeling it invariably leaves afterwards is of a merriment that lingers on. Of course, not all changes fall in that category - specially the ones that I have not chosen for myself. But whenever I am in the driver's seat, and am the one who has a say in the diversions I take from the planned route, the new destinations that I reach usually gladden me at the end of it.
While change in one's lifestyle or shifting to a new apartment may be simpler transitions to bring about or bear with, a change in one's toughts however is a more onerous undertaking - something that can drain a lot out of a person. I have learnt a few traits - the so called acquired behavior much like acquired taste - but its been a struggle. Because the very thing that you are tying to bring a difference to is what you actually are - what defines who you are, your nature, your self...And I wonder if that inherent self ever changes. Although we may learn to swagger to a new tune, does the basic rhythm ever change?
I know that I am slave to some of my habits - things that I am not sure I would ever be able to change, although the fate lines on hand suggest so... So is change really that simple? is the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder really that uncommon? Arent we all symptomatic of it at some or the other level?
As I spoke those words, my mind wandered back to another incident from a few years back. It was on a chilly evening in Pittsburgh in 2004 that I recall this gentleman who claimed his powers in palmistry. A room-mate of my friend, he exclaimed loudly when he saw my hand (the third in the series of hands that he read that evening). He claimed that it was the most interesting hand he had ever read. Amongst the many other things he professed, one was that I would nt stay settled in one place for too long. That change would be an inevitable part of my destiny. That transformation would be constant and perennial.
The meory brought a smile to my face... Somewhat torn between my most certain destiny and my innate inertia to resist change, I pondered over my own acceptance of impending changes. And although I detest the idea of transitions from one to the other, from old to the new, I know in the heart of my hearts that I enjoy change. Unsettling as it may be during the time when it happens, the feeling it invariably leaves afterwards is of a merriment that lingers on. Of course, not all changes fall in that category - specially the ones that I have not chosen for myself. But whenever I am in the driver's seat, and am the one who has a say in the diversions I take from the planned route, the new destinations that I reach usually gladden me at the end of it.
While change in one's lifestyle or shifting to a new apartment may be simpler transitions to bring about or bear with, a change in one's toughts however is a more onerous undertaking - something that can drain a lot out of a person. I have learnt a few traits - the so called acquired behavior much like acquired taste - but its been a struggle. Because the very thing that you are tying to bring a difference to is what you actually are - what defines who you are, your nature, your self...And I wonder if that inherent self ever changes. Although we may learn to swagger to a new tune, does the basic rhythm ever change?
I know that I am slave to some of my habits - things that I am not sure I would ever be able to change, although the fate lines on hand suggest so... So is change really that simple? is the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder really that uncommon? Arent we all symptomatic of it at some or the other level?
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