How To Return To Writing If You Have Lost Your Confidence #MondayBlogs
I have lost and found my writing confidence hundreds of times.
Losing your writing confidence can feel like you’ve lost the key to your favourite world and over time you become haunted by the scary thought that you might never return.
It’s important to remember that it’s not your writing confidence which is lost – it’s actually YOU.
You are lost. This has helped me enormously at times. I have stopped searching externally and climbed inside myself to hunt out the issue.
The common issue for me and this is based on my personal experience is that my writing confidence disappears when I have created false expectations. In order to return to my writing I have to hunt down the false expectation I put on myself and stamp on it.
With writing there are a variety of false expectations to choose from and it really is a case of ‘pick your poison.’ You only have to look on social media and it won’t be too long before your mind will start building some false expectations like – ‘I will get picked up by a literary agent pretty quickly…as that writer got signed on her first query,’ and, ‘my book will fly up the book charts…just like that author’s book,’ and ‘it won’t take me long to write a book…I mean that writer over there is churning out a book every two months.’ Things get problematic when you and your writing don’t measure up to these expectations. You soon become lost in your head and stuck in a maze of negative thoughts. Your confidence vanishes and writing will seem like a distant memory. Hunt your false expectation! Get rid of it. Accept that writing growth is about the small wins and I mean SMALL. Alter your expectations. Celebrate small wins like, finishing a first draft, editing your book, sending out your book to query, receiving rejections (these are a sign you are out there) and being resilient.
The next on my list is to retrace your steps. This is hard when you are lost but try to think back to where things went astray. What happened to you before you became lost? What were you working on? This is helpful but it will bring up some uncomfortable feelings.
If you were in the middle of writing something / working on a project before you became lost – the answer is in that piece of writing. Now here’s something which has been a game changer for me. When I have been lost – it has actually been my writing intuition trying to get in contact with me to say something isn’t right. It could be with the first, second, third or fourth draft. There could also be a plot hole I have missed or a character not working. My writer intuition has failed to contact me on my mobile (lol) or on social media and has resorted to flooding my mind with creative fear. Ha! I have then gone into panic mode and given up / become lost. It would be helpful if my writer intuition could take down my number 
If you were deluged with rejections or negative feedback – don’t panic. I have been lost here too. I am afraid rejection and negative feedback still happen when you are an established author so it’s best to accept that this is all part of the process. Put your project aside. Take the heat off your emotions and write something new. Give your mind a rest from thinking about why that project didn’t work or what you have to do to recalibrate. Put some distance between you and the project. You are a brave writer. You have been in battle which is something to be celebrated.
Fill your creative well. This is one of my favourite parts of the creative process. Read books, watch films, research things in history which interest you, go to museums, the theatre and art galleries. Paint, draw, sew, crochet or knit. Make things which make you smile. Go for long walks, dance to forgotten albums, people watch in cafes and tell yourself you are open to new ideas.
You will find your way back to writing. I know you will. I have been where you are now and I know how awful it feels. This will pass. Look inside yourself as the answers and the way out of your maze are waiting for you.
Start small. Even if it’s just opening up your laptop or notebook. Celebrate the fact you opened it for 2 minutes and then closed it again. Try again the next day. Small steps. Once you can withstand opening your laptop for 5 mins write something. Anything. Again keep small. A paragraph will do.
You are a writer 
