12 or 20 (second series) questions with Hannah Kezema

Hannah Kezema is an artist whoworks across mediums. She is the author of the debut collection, This Conversation is Being Recorded (Game Over Books, 2023), and the chapbook, three (Tea and Tattered Pages, 2017),and her work appears in Black Sun Lit,Grimoire, New Life Quarterly, FullStop, Spiral Orb, and otherplaces. She was the 2018 Arteles Resident of the Enter Text program, and she iscurrently the co-editor of Moving Parts Press’s broadside series of Latinx andChicanx poetry, in collaboration with Felicia Rice and Angel Dominguez. Shelives in the Santa Cruz mountains by the sea, among the redwoods andwildflowers.

1 - How did your first book or chapbook change your life? Howdoes your most recent work compare to your previous? How does it feeldifferent?

My chapbook, three, came out in 2017 through a nowdefunct press, Tea and Tattered Pages, and I remember feeling like I’d beenvalidated as a writer. I was still sort of fresh out of grad school, and beingsolicited (after many, many rejections) and then published felt like I’d beengiven the “okay” to keep going. It’s a strange and dark little book centeredaround the number 3 – triangles, mirrors, mythology, pyramids, threesomes, andan unreliable first-, second-, and third-person narration. Very experimentaland what I would call within the Naropa [University] aesthetic. I rememberbeing really surprised that there were no edits from the publisher, aside froma few things I tweaked here and there, since I tend to over-edit. Looking back,I definitely would’ve asked more questions about the process and book roll-out,but I hadn’t even so much as signed a contract, and that book struggled to getout in the world for a variety of reasons.

My debut full-length, This Conversation Is Being Recorded,which came out with Game Over Books in late March, was a completely differentexperience, both in terms of the publishing process and subject matter. I’veworked in the insurance fraud industry for the past 7 years now in a few roles,but primarily, as a field investigator and editor, and I began writing poemsabout the cases I was working on about one year in. Over time, the poems beganaccumulating, and Game Over Books was actually the reason the book becamehybrid. I’d always been interested in incorporating visual aspects into mywork, and ironically, This Conversation Is Being Recorded was my firstwork that was just straight up poetry. Honestly, after creating hybrid workwithout any traction for years, I was a little discouraged, and I was trying todo something more “straightforward.” But I was so thankful to have a publisherthat understood my praxis as an artist and encouraged me to go all out. To pickup the paintbrush. Get my hands in the dirt. 

2 - How did you come to poetry first, as opposed to, say,fiction or non-fiction?

I kind of came to poetry last! I studied literature in myundergrad while at the New School, and when I got to Naropa for my MFA, I wasvery much interested in writing prose but also expanding my notion of whatprose could be. I hadn’t read any contemporary poetry whatsoever and feltcompletely out of the loop compared to my peers. I hadn’t even heard of smallpress publishing, and outside of doing theatre for years, I’d never read mywork in front of anyone. Those two years were vigorous for me because I hadalways felt safer in the sentence than the line. Then, of course, I fell inlove with the freedom of the line. 

3 - How long does it take to start any particular writingproject? Does your writing initially come quickly, or is it a slow process? Dofirst drafts appear looking close to their final shape, or does your work comeout of copious notes?

It depends on how we quantify a “start,” but I’d say that themoment I have an idea for something, even if it isn’t totally cohesive, Iusually make a note in my notebook or phone. Something non-committal because Idon’t want to scare the idea away! Then I’ll usually wait and see if the ideasticks. Sometimes, lines will come to me first, without the full shape of theidea, but more often than not, I’ll get the impulse to make something specificand it’s a matter of figuring out from there whether it’s fruitful orworthwhile. I think about things very categorically. When the idea becomes aThing, then the real work happens, and I am (to my own detriment) quite aperfectionist in that regard. I want my first draft to be as close to polishedas possible, and as an editor, I can’t turn that part of my brain off. Ioverthink and I edit and edit and edit, which is likely why each project takesme years to complete.   

4 - Where does a poem usually begin for you? Are you anauthor of short pieces that end up combining into a larger project, or are youworking on a "book" from the very beginning?

I’ve always considered myself a very projects-orientedperson, maybe to a fault. I have a very hard time writing a piece “justbecause,” or without thinking about it within a larger context. Of course,every now and then, I’m inspired to write a poem with no strings attached. I’mtrying to be better about this because I think being so book-forward canactually stifle the process. Who’s to say a single poem can’t hold the samegravity as a book of poems? This is something I’ve been thinking about lately. 

5 - Are public readings part of or counter to your creativeprocess? Are you the sort of writer who enjoys doing readings?

I have a kind of love-hate relationship with readings. Forstarters, they make me very anxious, despite my performance background. There’ssomething specifically stressful about reading words you’ve written in front ofa crowd – it’s more vulnerable for me than singing. But I will say that thedread only lies in the build-up of the event because once I’m reading, I’m inthe zone. And I feel the post-reading high afterwards. While it’s stillchallenging all these years later, I think it’s important to take your work offthe page and let it test the waters. What comes up – and how others respond -might surprise you and possibly change the trajectory of the work. I do believea sort of synergy can happen between the reader and the audience when bringingthe written word into a physical space.  

6 - Do you have any theoretical concerns behind your writing?What kinds of questions are you trying to answer with your work? What do youeven think the current questions are?

I’m not sure that my body of work has a unifying theme by anymeans, but I think of each work in terms of various stages of my life. All mywork is hybrid, which is a common thread, but where my earlier works were moreconceptual and form driven, This Conversation Is Being Recorded and thework leading up to it became more about my own life, my job, the seeking oftruth, and exploring issues like labor and gender under capital. Of course, Ican’t help but weave in the visual aspects, too. Perhaps I’m not as interestedin answering the questions as I am in letting the questions linger in mywork. 

7 – What do you see the current role of the writer being inlarger culture? Do they even have one? What do you think the role of the writershould be?

This is a tough question, as I feel I’m still figuring thisout for myself. Many people will say that in these times, the role of theartist at large is to be an activist for change. I don’t disagree with this butalso feel the pressure of it and find myself just as interested with theinternal kind of revolution that a reader can experience. If a text can changethe way you think or feel, then I think it’s fulfilled its “purpose.” Alleffective change must begin with the individual. I also can’t deny that therole of the writer historically has been the outrider of society, and yet, theyare also the visionaries who archive histories, and their legacies live onbeyond them. The writer is the dreamer, the documentarian, the hermit, theShaman. Ultimately, I think writers and artists shouldn’t be afraid to createfor themselves – the act of creating a work of art is just as, if not morevital, than its reception. When we become too concerned with the latter, westray further from poetry and closer to careerism. There’s a lot of nepotism inthe poetry “community,” but I don’t believe in the commodification of poetry. Ibelieve that defeats poetry’s very essence. 

8 - Do you find the process of working with an outside editordifficult or essential (or both)?

Both! Especially as I’ve had many people tell me I’m a brutaleditor myself. But it’s always valuable to get an outside perspective on yourwork. Sometimes we just need another pair of eyes.

9 - What is the best piece of advice you've heard (notnecessarily given to you directly)?

I can’t remember who said this, or if it was a conglomerationof things other people have said, but more or less: “Give yourself permissionto write.” And probably cliché at this point, but Ginsberg’s “first thoughtbest thought.”

10 - How easy has it been for you to move between genres(poetry to visual art)? What do you see as the appeal?

I don’t typically do both simultaneously, as I believedifferent mediums require different minds. But they can support one another inthat way – it can be incredibly beneficial to turn to painting when I’m hittinga wall with the writing. That being said, I do find the visual work is fasterfor me, or at least I spend less time doing it. For instance, with ThisConversation Is Being Recorded, most of the paintings were created in thefinal months of my working on the manuscript, whereas the text itself took meabout six years. For this book, I needed to get all the writing out first, sortof like laying down the foundation. I needed more time to consider how thevisuals would be executed, with plenty of trial and error along the way. 

11 - What kind of writing routine do you tend to keep, or doyou even have one? How does a typical day (for you) begin?

What’s cool about this is you asked me a similar question in 2019, and when I first answered, Ihad recently completed my first residency at Arteles in Haukijärvi, Finland,during which time, I’d finally developed (if only for about a month) aconsistent writing routine. Outside of that and my MFA program, I really haven’thad one. I used to shame myself about it, but I’ve learned that I’m not thekind of writer who can force it. I’m not of the school of thought that doingsome writing is better than no writing at all. I’m just not interested inwriting for writing’s sake, but I know this works for a lot of other folks. Ialso hate sitting down at the computer. Unconventional aspects of my “writingroutine” are spending time outside, touching water, having meaningfulexperiences with people I love, sitting still with hard feelings, spending timewith art that moves me, and traveling. I let myself get inspired, and it keepsthe writing exciting (and not burdensome) for me. 

12 - When your writing gets stalled, where do you turn orreturn for (for lack of a better word) inspiration?

Usually, I read the work of others before me or turn to otherforms of art altogether, so as not to be too influenced. I’m also a firmbeliever in a good walk or moving the body in general to getunstuck.   

13 - What fragrance reminds you of home?

Pine-Sol, newspaper, and fireplace smells. Fresh mint leavesalways make me think of my grandmother and her famous iced tea. Cinnamon andclove remind me of my mother. 

14 - David W. McFadden once said that books come from books,but are there any other forms that influence your work, whether nature, music,science or visual art?

Being in nature is vital – among the flowers, trees, animals,fungi, and bodies of water. I also usually listen to music that resonates withthe mood of what I’m writing. It’s surprising what can come up if you even justput on a song that makes you emotional. It can make the writing even morecathartic or therapeutic. I also love zoning out to images as a break fromlanguage, which can be so unruly. Letting my mind rest and my eyes scan thecolors, shapes, and textures of something allows me to slow down. Gardening andcreating floral arrangements with flowers from my garden and other things I’veforaged has also been really meditative but creative at the same time. 

15 - What other writers or writings are important for yourwork, or simply your life outside of your work?

So many, but I’ll try to be brief: Molly Brodak, Diane Seuss,June Jordan, Maggie Nelson, Clarice Lispector, Truman Capote, Lisa Robertson,CAConrad, Theresa Hak Kyung Cha, etc. etc. 

16 - What would you like to do that you haven't yet done?

Take a real vacation in adulthood. 

17 – If you could pick any other occupation to attempt, whatwould it be? Or, alternately, what do you think you would have ended up doinghad you not been a writer?

I always saw myself studying law or forensics if I decided togive up on my creative pursuits. I’ve also felt like I could’ve been a lawyer(or even judge) in a former life. I’m fascinated by detectives but could neverbe a cop. For some time, my dream job was to be a handwriting analyst, which Iguess isn’t too far off from writing.  

18 – What made you write, as opposed to doing something else?

Writing has always come naturally for me, even if I resistedit at first. I was a voracious reader as a child and wrote these dark littleghost stories. But what I really dreamt of then was becoming an actress andsinger – I always wanted to perform. I did theater all throughout high school,studied it during my first year of college, and I was living in New York,hustling but not getting call-backs and questioning whether my heart was reallyin it. I ultimately decided it wasn’t working and took a semester off to travelto California and then transfer to another school to study literature beforelater going on to study writing and poetics in grad school. It worked outpretty seamlessly, in the end, but I still sometimes miss being on stage. Maybemy next phase will be playwriting, who knows?   

 

19 - What was the last great book you read? What was the lastgreat film?

La Movida by Tatiana Luboviski-Acosta and Asteroid City by WesAnderson.

20 - What are you currently working on?

Self-care and gardening, for the most part. I’ll be teachingan online workshop focused on This Conversation Is Being Recorded onOctober 24th and hope to have some morereadings later in the year. I may have also started writing another book, butonly time will tell… 

 

12 or 20 (second series) questions;