The Swipe Volume 1 Chapter 29
I’m very careful not to call myself a sports fan. Ball games in particular leave me cold (a correlation to the terrible time the clumsy, short-sighted schoolboy Rob had during PE, shivering at the boundary or in goal, always picked last, missing every shot fired in my general direction).
However, TLC and I spent a great afternoon at the Diamond League athletics meet in Stratford last month. The UCI World Cycling Champs were a lock on the TV recently. And yes, we will be in front of a screen this Sunday cheering on the Lionesses.
Hmm. #notallballgames. Maybe I’m more interested than I thought. Just don’t ask me what football team I support.
Wherever you are, whenever you are, however you are, welcome to The Swipe.
Rob is reading…
Cinema Speculation by Quentin Tarantino. His first proper long-form dose of writing about film, and it’s pretty much what you’d expect. Fast talking, opinionated, bulging with ideas. It also reads like a first draft. Massively entertaining, of course, but oh, what it could have been if the cowardly publisher had allowed an editor to give it the once-over.
Rob is watching…
Sometimes, all you want is a bit of scenery-chewing. This is top-tier chompery from two of the best. You had me at Medievel Malcolm Tucker.
Rob is listening…
I was watching a doco about a hill-farmer based in a very isolated part of the Lake District. It was him, the sheep, a small house and that was it. The farmer was stoic, dour, monosyllabic, all the stuff you’d expect. Towards the end of the sequence he said, out of nowhere, ‘it’s a good life if you don’t weaken.’ That’s economy of storytelling for you. Very Cormac McCarthy. As far as I can tell, the phrase is the title of a hugely influential graphic novel by Seth and—this.
Rob is eating…
Fish and chips from our local, Ready Tasty on Henley Road, for the first time in a long while. They still cook to order and it’s still fantastic value for money. Very happy to see the place still doing the bizzo for the people of Caversham. Yes, I was today years old when I got the Dingtown pun in the name. We’ve only been here for 18 years…
Rob’s Low-Key Obsession Of The Week…
John Bull provides the base concept for a series of comics, which will eventually roll out into a Netflix series. This makes so much sense, especially with regards to our own l’il border-walker.
On the subject of everyone’s favourite fluffy little demons, here’s some thoughts on the most famous quantum moggy of them all. A century after Schrödinger first came up with his consideration on cats and boxes, we are still arguing over exactly what it means. Which is, I guess, kind of the point, no?
You have to tread carefully with Reddit. Hit the wrong sub and you can find yourself knee-deep in toxic sludge. Pick wisely, though, and there is gold to be found. Take r/KitchenConfidential, in which hospitality professionals spill the tea on their industry. This entry from the user who delightfully identifies as TheRealSuperNoodle hits hard. And yes, I believe that is a Bourdain quote at the end.
Taking a step sideways but always forward, this bit from Ben Rowan for Texas Monthly, who spent a week eating only at the Lone Star’s favourite burger chain, is not just a dumb food challenge. It’s an exploration of why we leave the house to get dinner. Any dining-out experience is, at best, only 30% about the food. Once you find your spot, you’re in for good.
One last food link. This entangles weakly with the story in the previous chapter about cooking the iconic recipes from The Bear. Once you’ve mastered the boursin-and-crisp omelette, why not try some other famous meals? OK, I appreciate we’re in Binging With Babish territory but hey, I’d never say no to a steamed ham.
Some sad news for Ninth Art advocates. Matt Boer’s The Nib, home to prime politicomical output for the last ten years, is shuttering at the end of the month. A hint of cheer amidst the sadness—you can snag all the available issues as PDFs for free until August 31st. I suggest you step to it. The Nib has been a long-time favourite of mine. I’m sorry to see it go.
Part tool, part toy, part literary game, Blackout is a great way to experiment with a particularly random form of text generation. Give it a go. You may be surprised at what is revealed.
Steve Albini’s ferocious reputation as brutal agitator and master feather-ruffler is nearly as well-known as his musical background as engineer (he hates the term ‘producer’) behind some astonishing records. When, a couple of years back, he began to publicly express contrition for the things he had said and done in the past, initial surprise was followed by realisation. He has always been true to himself. The acceptance that the person you were is not the person you are now is part of the human condition, and Steve leans into that with the blunt forth-rightfulness which is his trademark. When Albini realises he’s been an asshole, he will do something about it.
This is not a piece about baseball. It is about meritocracy and fair working conditions. I’m not convinced by Jeff Maurer’s advocacy for a strictly performance-data run workplace (just look at Amazon for an example of how that can go wrong) but it’s certainly food for thought.
Zepotha is this year’s Goncharov. If that last sentence makes sense to you please put down your mobile device and get out in the sunshine for a bit. You’ve been online too long.
We flagged up the Little Lytton a few weeks ago. Now, the main event has announced prizewinners for the worst opening sentence to a novel for 2023. There are some howlers in this year’s tranche—which is as it should be. My favourite?
If there’s a snake in your boot, you dump it out by the creek, and if it’s got feathers, you dump it out in the creek, and if it’s talkin’ at you, you dump it out gently and apologize and keep an eye out for the mama dragon, and tarnation these city slickers don’t know the first thing about stayin’ alive out here.
Mara Lynn Johnstone, Santa Rose, CA
I’d read a book that started like that.
(Those of you with a nervous disposition may wish to avoid the Vile Puns section. There’s really no excuse for that sort of behavior.)
Just cos of all the chat about Taylor Swift’s Eras tour, I sought out footage of the last great live event which really grabbed onto the public’s attention. I remember when this was in the papers every single day. You know what? Still slams. Strap in and cinch up. Things is gonna get tight.
See you in seven, true believers.
