Getting Old


This is apost for those who are getting old or considering themselves old, from 65-100.

Right now, I am 91.* I will be 92 inOctober. I have my own house, but I cannot live in it alone because of myphysical inability to move around. One of my sons lives with me.

All of us will have to make someadjustments. That includes money, relatives, your own ability and willpower tostay independent, etc. My advice is if physically and financially you can liveindependently, you should certainly do that. If you do, you will still need tohave visits from your family frequently. You need your family. Even if youdon’t need them to take care of you, you need them for the fellowship. The morefellowship you have, the longer you’ll live. If you can stay independent do it,but only if friends and relatives can see you often.

In my case, I can’t walk, and I can’tdo much physically. So, whether I like it or not, someone else has to get meup, get me showered, and get me dressed. I am blessed to have three sons whotake turns doing that.

The next best thing is to move inwith one of your children or one of your brothers or sisters. That may be ahardship for them, so if you have any money at all, contribute to the upkeepthat you require.

When you get to this age, you haveto make decisions. It is very likely that you won’t want the decisions thatyour children make for you. I don’t have a solution for that. Whatever you do,don’t do it in rebellion. Do it very positively. Whatever the solution is, takeit as God’s provision.

Whether you stay at home or insomeone else’s home or in an elder care residence, participate in any Biblestudies or worship services that you can. If you’ve never been interested inthat, you might want to get interested. These people are Christians. They maybe very warm Christians, and you need that warmth and fellowship. Even if you haven’tbeen to church or a Bible study before, go for it.

If your relatives are not in thesame town, stay in touch with them, either by writing to them or by telephone.You need that contact.

I have a friend I’ve known formany, many years. She was a Navy nurse in Japan and became a Christian at thattime. She’s now 96 years old and lives in Charleston, SC. Periodically, shecalls me. I’m in Moscow, Idaho. She doesn’t call me because we’re relatives(we’re not). She calls me because we are friends, and she needs to stay intouch with her friends. It’s a healthy thing. It’s very easy to live your lifewithout friends. Pretty soon, they just disappear from your life. That is not ahealthy thing. Stay in touch with your friends. Some of your friends may havebecome widows or widowers, and perhaps they have married someone else that youdon’t know. Reach out and get to know your friends’ new spouses. They need youas much as you need them.

If your relatives’ children livesome distance from you, telephone and write to them often. If you reach out tothem often, they will respond to you often. When you are in touch with them,ask them all kinds of questions about all of their children and all of theirrelatives so you get the news about everyone you used to know well.

The major thing in all this is thatyou are a human being, and people are created by God to be with other people.Make it a point to stay in touch. Even if it’s only one person, it will be alifeline.


*Written July 2, 2019.

How To Be Free From Bitterness and other essays on Christian relationships
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Published on June 19, 2023 05:30
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