📚The Price of Art and a Year in Pictures
The Price of Art...
Lately I've been thinking a lot about the price of art. I write books. That is my art. I write books. That is my business. Can there be a true separation of the two? It's something I've worked toward, but nine+ years into this career, I have not quite struck the balance. I don't even know if it exists. And I'm not saying this in a glass-half-empty way. I'm saying this as someone who is living the "dream" of sorts.
I quit my "day" job in 2016. I worked in the nightclub world, so I never actually saw the sunlight. I took the advice "don't quit your job" to heart. It was something that was said to me, and something that I saw to emerging writers, too. Keep your first job as long as possible, especially if it comes with health insurance. I know. I know why being a full-time writer alone is appealing. You make your own hours. Your boss can't yell at you because you are your own boss, so you'd really just be yelling at yourself, which I do quite often. You can show up to work in your pajamas.
But there's this thing that happens when writing is your only source of income: the pressure is on the words, the art, the creativity that has to arrive live clockwork because deadlines wait for no one.
When I quit my job in 2016, I had about 10 months of savings, 12 if I budgeted (but I didn't budget). The pressure was on. Sell books (Incendiary). Sell another book (Orquidea Divina). Then another (Stripped). And another (Star Wars). But wait, one more (The Way to Rio Luna). It was 2017 and I took every deal I could, even though my creativity was a dirty sponge on a drying rack, a used condom (ew I know. Dhonielle was very mad at me when I used this metaphor), a bar rag that never gets washed but bartenders use it every day (I worked at a bar so I've seen it). All these years later, I've made it work by the skin of my teeth.
The reason I always always go back to this year of my career is that it was a diversion, an intersection with many paths for me to follow. Sometimes I went the wrong way... Sometimes I went the right way (Orquidea, Rio Luna, Star Wars).
So what was the price for me, for my art?
I have learned my value. I have learned how to say no to deals that are not worth my time.
I have learned to walk away from business relationships that are toxic.
I have learned that only I can dig myself out of a rut.
I have learned that I can't have a dream job. Dreams are great. But dreams don't pay the bills and dreams don't come true if I'm not putting in the work. I have to do, I have to write. (This is a lesson I have taken from Shonda Rhymes's The Year of Yes and Master Yoda.)
I have learned that this industry will break my heart every single time, with every single book, but as long as I write the best book I possibly can at that moment, I can be proud of my work.
Look, this industry isn't a slog struggle bus journey for everyone. Some people drive to the top right away. But I'm never going to be happy if I don't concentrate on my own journey and the only thing I have control over: the words.
I have learned that. in some ways, I'm the one who determines the price of my art. Trying to stay afloat in an ever-changing business that I still can't fully understand costs a lot to my mental and physical health. I have crippling anxiety that I didn't have pre-2016, and my frayed tendon on my shoulder can't fully heal because I can't take enough time off to give it a rest. And yet, I'm not quite done telling stories. Maybe one day the price won't be worth it to me and I'll go live in a quiet forest cabin with no forwarding address. But that will be my choice because I determine the cost of my art.
For now, I'm looking forward to a new year, new books, and new worlds.
A snippet of me reading from The Inheritance of Orquídea Divina
NEWS
We sold Italian translation rights to Mondadori! It's my first time having my work in Italian and I am so excited.
We are getting the paperback treatment. I know, it's an entirely different direction. There are many reasons why covers get changed. I'd use a lot of buzzwords like "new markets" and "target audiences" and such. But I think when a book has done as much as possible in one format, it's time to try something new. It comes out July 5th, 2022.
A YEAR IN REVIEW
JANUARY: I kicked off the year in New Orleans. Dhonielle and I worked on our podcast, Deadline City, and quarantined in this house to meet our deadlines. I did edits to Valentina Salazar is Not a Monster Hunter, pass pages for The Inheritance of Orquidea Divina, and final proofs for Illusionary.
FEBRUARY: I moved down to Puerto Rico to get some work done.
MARCH: I got ARCs for the SFF anthology I edited: Reclaim the Stars is coming out on February 15, 2022!
APRIL: Labyrinth Lost was released in Spanish translation, and the paperback of Incendiary came out!
MAY: Illusionary was released, completing the Hollow Crown duology. If you love high fantasy, romance, and court intrigue, this one is for you.
JUNE: I went back to New York to see my family and celebrate my 34th birthday!
JULY: I went to the Celsius Festival in Spain. Got to see my friends. It had been a year since I saw my co-editor Natalie Parker and Tessa Gratton. I stayed in Spain for three weeks exploring the south. It was ~incredible~
AUGUST: The Inheritance of Orquidea Divina was selected by Book of the Month Club! It was definitely a career first for me.
SEPTEMBER: After I sold it in 2017, The Inheritance of Orquídea Divina was finally published. I also moved to Los Angeles for two months. Here I am in Target waiting for my book to show up on the big screens. Here (right) is a picture my agency took of Orquídea on an Amazon billboard in Times Fucking Square.
B&N is currently having a 50% sale off hardcovers so if you've been waiting for a price drop to get it, now is your chance!
OCTOBER - NOVEMBER: I went on a writing retreat in Mexico. It was the definition of "refill the well" for me.
DECEMBER: Finally, the year comes to an end with a project very close to my heart. It's an anthology by all Latina romance authors. Nine stories that celebrate Latinidad, love, and Christmas Eve. I have two stories as Zoey Castile here and writing these were a joy for me throughout the year. One day I'll write about how many doors closed in our faces while we were trying to make this anthology happen, but that's a story for the future. For now, I just want to celebrate an anthology that is just pure holiday joy. Christmas is over, but if you're still in the mood you can get your copy here.
We even got a brilliant review in the New York Freaking Times, an interview in NBC Latino, and a mention in EW!
And! If you missed the launch party, you can watch it here as well.
That's all, folks. I truly hope your 2022 is easier on your head and heart, and that you are finding small joys in a chaotic world. Thank you for all your support, for reading my words, and for simply being here. Happy New Year.
Click here to listen to Vampires Never Get Old
