How to Help Declutter Your Parents’ Home Before They Die
By Rita Wilkins
The Downsizing Designer
There’s always more than one side to a story.
That’s why it’s important to have conversations and listen to each other’s points of view so you can learn from each other and come up with mutually agreeable solutions.
What am I referring to?
How can you help your parents declutter their home before they die… so you can…
Prevent the need for the BIG CLEAN OUT once they’re gone… much of which can be done beforehand.Have all participate in the decision-making and the decluttering process itself… lighten the physical and emotional load.Avoid family battles, sibling, rivalry, and hard feelings, that impact the family, often for many years.A few months ago, I was asked to speak at a conference about decluttering for baby boomers, one of the subjects in my book, Downsize Your Life, Upgrade Your Lifestyle.
After I spoke, and during the book signing event, I had 2 separate conversations that made me realize how painful this topic is for both the adult children and the aging parents.
And that this hot topic not only needs to be addressed but solutions are also needed to be offered.
Conversation #1 (mid 30’s male)A young man in his mid-30s approached me and said, every time I bring up the subject of decluttering and downsizing with my parents, they get extremely defensive, and it often escalates into a big argument.
He said they became outraged and refused to talk about the subject even though I told them that I am more than willing to help them with the entire process.
He was hurt and frustrated because he wants to help them with the huge task while they were still alive and able to help with the decision-making.
But they just won’t listen!
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Conversation #2 (retired baby boomer couple)At the same conference, a retired baby boomer couple told me that they know they need to declutter and ultimately downsize, but they are overwhelmed with the physical and emotional task of decluttering a lifetime of possessions.
They wish their kids would offer to help, but when the topic comes up, they show little or no interest, because they are so busy with their own lives.
The couple was frustrated, disappointed, and quietly annoyed because they know that once they are gone, much of their prized possessions will just get put in a dumpster with little or no regard for their wishes.
They are also concerned that there will be family disputes among their children so they wish they could find a way to work together while they are still healthy and able to help make decisions about their own things.
But they just don’t care!
2 different sides to the same problem:How to help parents declutter their home before they die.
Avoiding the conversation altogether is a big mistake. It just doesn’t work.
The reality: your parents will die and there will be a lot to do to clean out their home when they’re gone.
No one likes to discuss it, but avoiding the subject and postponing the conversation will only make matters worse when that day comes.
How do you get your parents on board to discuss decluttering their home? And…How do you get your adult kids on board to consider lending a hand with your decluttering?I’ve created 2 separate PDFs, to help you start these conversations:
PDF #1: How to Get Your PARENTS on Board to Talk About Decluttering Before They Die
PDF #2: How to Get Your KIDS on Board to Help with Decluttering Before You Die
If you would like a copy of either one or both of these PDFs to get the conversation going, please email me at ritawilkins@ritawilkins.com
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