Public Domain Heroes: The Press Guardian #9
David Michael Newstead | The Philosophy of Shaving
This is the new Enterprise News! Tonight, a continued look at our country’s President and his vital mission to rejuvenate the nation in the exclusive Enterprise News docu-series, Alexander Krebtz: The People’s Patriot.
“Krebtz is utterly unique in history. He is an everyman who represents the very best of his people, sharing in their joys and sorrows. But what we’re seeing now is that he’s already achieved a monumental stature as a world leader and modern nation-builder,” says historian Arnold Ryanyoth.
Like his homeland, Krebtz has struggled, he’s persevered, and ultimately he’s triumphed. Today, the president is leading a nation on the move, steering the ship of state with vision and determination!
“Alexander Krebtz saw his country weakened,” says Professor Gilbert Natatut, “Crime, drugs, immigration… the problems we faced threatened our very way of life. But the president took action. More than anything else, he’s really a man of action. And that’s defined his whole life.”
Born in Yabarma province, Krebtz had a modest upbringing where education was prioritized. His father was a police officer and his mother was a traditional homemaker. An avid student, Alexander won a scholarship to Amtilica University before beginning his career in public service…
“Will you please turn this shit off?!” Nathan Darms moaned, “It is torture.”
“We have to fact-check it, unfortunately,” Perry Chase said, staring down at his laptop amid the dwindling number of people on staff.
“A fifteen-part documentary?!” Nathan exclaimed, “Jesus Christ! Who the hell is this guy – Winston fucking Churchill?”
“Talks like Churchill, acts like Mussolini,” Perry replied, “Plus, this is only the third episode.”
Nathan sighed loudly in agony.
“… Love of country is at the core of everything the President does. When he speaks about Yaharza and the Yaharzan people, it’s like he’s talking about his own family. And that’s a big part of his vision for the country. Family first!” Professor Natatut continued.
On the screen, a serious-looking, gray-haired interviewer leaned in, “Some people have called Krebtz’s presidency the country’s second founding. Is that accurate in your view?”
“Oh, there’s no question!” The professor replied, “His first four years in office have already changed the country for the better! This is really the beginning of a brand new era not only in Yaharzan history, but in the history of the world…”
As the unrelenting praise continued, images flashed by in succession: Krebtz’s childhood home, a black-and-white photo of his graduation, a grainy picture of him in an army uniform. Then came video of his fiery speeches in parliament, graphs charting the decrease in crime during his tenure as Interior Minister, and a few youthful clips of his short six month term as Prime Minister some years earlier. The national flag was present in every shot, every graphic, every corner of the screen. The episode dramatically culminated in Krebtz’s election to the presidency and dark implications of a nation on the precipice without his leadership.
“Today, the people chose order over chaos!” The president-elect proclaimed from his lectern that night four years ago, while balloons and confetti rained down around him. “Yaharza has forever embraced strength as the cornerstone of our future! And I promise to lead this nation to greatness!”
The screen faded to black. The national anthem played as the credits rolled for several minutes.
“Is it over?” Nathan asked, barely containing his irritation.
It wasn’t, Perry thought. The worst was ahead of them.
On television, the country appeared to be in the midst of a warm, harmonious, and patriotic revival where young smiling faces and fluttering flags dominated every vantage point. Out in the streets, the view was starkly different. Behind the mask of the Press Guardian, Perry Chase saw it play out each night. Yaharza’s two largest cities were edging toward local elections just as the regime’s plans and methods were coming more sharply into focus. These places were opposition strongholds that the New National Dream would stop at nothing to capture. A secret war was already underway, in fact. It took the form of alleyway battles, barroom brawls, intimidation, arrests, and attacks posing as random crimes and accidents. Now, every police chief, every city council seat, every precinct captain, and district commissioner were pivotal to the future of their democracy. And in the election’s shadow, the Press Guardian would be there, watching and preparing.
A Wolf in Patriot’s Clothing
By Cynthia Blake | The Daily Review-Express
There are really two sides to President Alexander Krebtz. On one side is the hardworking attorney, a law-and-order advocate of national greatness, and a faithful family man. His humble proposition, we’ve been told, is a simple reassessment of the country’s relationship with the European Union and a reaffirmation of our place in the world. “Are we not distinct? Are we not exceptional?!” he asked a crowd recently on the campaign trail. It’s a theme Krebtz returns to again and again.
The other side of President Krebtz, far closer to the truth unfortunately, has been more visible as his time in office progresses. Krebtz’s face contorts with genuine disdain when he talks about those “tearing down the nation.” In his twisted worldview, homosexuals and transgender citizens are portrayed to be perverts and pedophiles. African migrants and Arab refugees receive no sympathy from Krebtz either as he casually refers to all of them as thieves and drug addicts. But even more affluent foreigners aren’t in his good graces. Not really. For decades, the country’s business community has included a small but successful group of people of Chinese, Indian, Greek, and Lebanese descent. These entrepreneurs came to Yaharza after the fall of the dictatorship and helped build our economy to what it is today. The president dismisses them as unwelcomed cheaters who inflate prices at every turn and steal jobs away from “real Yaharzans.” According to the New National Dream, other Europeans “infect us” with their weakness and their liberalism. And while Krebtz hasn’t quite said that the country’s close-knit Jewish community are aliens from outer space, he does everything he can to imply that. If you listen to president’s rhetoric for long enough, you realize this list of undesirables is quickly growing by the day: feminists, journalists, university students, intellectuals, patients with HIV, protestors, opposition candidates, opposition voters, former members of his own staff. In the fiery ranks of the New National Dream, all these groups are “defiling the nation,” a phrase repeated so often that it covers a completely contradictory set of party grievances.
Instead of being our proud flagbearer, each day Krebtz further reveals himself to be a petty autocrat and a paranoid bigot who believes our very civilization is besieged by outsiders from east and west. The image he glorifies of “organic Yaharzans” is so narrow, unbending, and unrelenting that it is stuff of bad science fiction, not a modern nation in Europe. It is a situation that beggars the political imagination of many observers. A leader who began his career fighting Islamic extremists and organized crime has now declared all, but a precious few of us to even be worthy of residing in our own country. To which I ask, are we not all distinct? Are we not all exceptional?
