It’s Hard to Get by Just Upon a Smile

Two brave souls shared their query letters. I’ve edited both here. They’re still not perfect, but hopefully gives you an idea of how to present your book and your credentials. Would love to hear your thoughts. TO read the originals, go into yesterday’s comments.

In this first letter, I’ve taken out most of the plot and focussed on the historical element, which strikes me as the most interesting part of the project. I like how she refers to comps as “could be shelved beside.” That’s a new one for me.

Dear Betsy Lerner:

The story for Becoming Mamie is inspired by The Maimie Papers: Letters from an Ex-Prostitute, eds. Ruth Rosen and Susan B. Davidson, Feminist Press, 1997. Set in YEAR and PLACE, it traces the life of Maimie as she is pulled into prostitution, pimped by white slavers, and finally establishes a halfway house for homeless girls. I’ve labored to bring historical accuracy to the novel. Major sources include Lost Sisterhood (Prostitution in America 1900-1918) by Ruth Rosen, Sin in the Second City by Karen Abbott, Bodies and Souls by Isabel Vincent, and Prostitution and Prejudice by Edward J. Bristow.

BECOMING MAIMIE could be shelved beside Third Daughter by Talia Carner , The Flower Boat Girl by Larry Feign, and The Lives of Diamond Bessie by Jody Hadlock (2022).What makes it unique from these titles?

ADD YOUR CREDENTIALS.

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Dear [agent],

The Year of Least Resistance takes place in 1970s west Texas in America (think Last Picture Show meets Lonesome Dove or some such) Jeff Chorus and Kitty Davidson are teenagers who find themselves with an unwanted pregnancy. When they give up the baby for adoption, they imagine they can return to innocence. Add one or two more sentences here to close out the themes or the impossibility of turning back the clock.

My short fiction has appeared in such publications as NOON, New York Tyrant, Best Microfiction 2019, Atticus Review, and The Writing Disorder. I published the memoir “High Street: Lawyers, Guns & Money in a Stoner’s New Mexico” (2012, Outpost 19), and the children’s novel, “Franny & Toby” (2015, Silky Oak Press). I hold a degree in philosophy from the University of Texas at El Paso.

You’ll see that I took out a lot extraneous stuff from the bio. Also, don’t do your bio in the third person. It’s stilted. You really want to stick to writing credentials and education if it’s pertinent.. I like how your college ties back to the setting of the book.

Let me know what you think, and thanks so much for sharing your query letters.