On choices, nagging and unpredictability of life. Blog marathon post 16
A discussion I had with a friend sparked off an interesting thought in
my mind. She was very surprised to know that I do not object to my
spouse smoking. (He is a smoker).
"But why don't you stop him? Why do you allow him to smoke?" She asked,
genuinely surprised and stunned perhaps that there indeed exist wives in
this world who 'let' their husbands smoke!
What interested me was the choice of words--"letting" and "allowing" your spouse to do something.
It's usually children who are 'allowed' and 'not allowed' certain things.
I told my friend that my husband is an adult and smoking is a choice he
makes. He knows enough to decide what is good and not good for him. I
do believe that one of the worst things spouses can do is nag the other
about something.
I think a good marriage is one where a spouse respects the other. One
cannot act like a protective parent in a marriage. If you act like a
protective parent, be prepared to deal with a rebellious teen.
The fact is nobody knows what will happen even in the next one hour. A
few months back my cousin's wife dropped down dead ( a massive cardiac
arrest) at the age of 36, leaving behind two kids who are seven and
five. She neither smoked nor drank.
Another close friend's first cousin went through a similar tragedy. Her
spouse who was 41 dropped down dead on his way to the bathroom. He
neither smoked nor drank and was a pure vegetarian too.
A friend's father who was a chronic smoker lived upto the age of 75. My
maternal grandfather lived upto the age of ninety two or so and he
smoked too.
Yes, I am aware of the dangers of smoking.
I am also aware that life is very unpredictable.
What matters is how you live each day.
Be grateful if you have lived today well. Say a little prayer of thanks
if you have had happy moments of togetherness with loved ones--friends
and family.
And don't try to control your spouse. If it makes them happy, let go! Life IS short!
And be happy yourself too!!
__________________________________________________________________________
If you like my blog, you might enjoy my books :) Grab them here. (You don't need a credit card. You can pay cash on delivery) or if you are an Amazon Fan, you can grab them here
And you can interact with me on my FB page. I almost always reply :)
http://preetishenoy.com/
my mind. She was very surprised to know that I do not object to my
spouse smoking. (He is a smoker).
"But why don't you stop him? Why do you allow him to smoke?" She asked,
genuinely surprised and stunned perhaps that there indeed exist wives in
this world who 'let' their husbands smoke!
What interested me was the choice of words--"letting" and "allowing" your spouse to do something.
It's usually children who are 'allowed' and 'not allowed' certain things.
I told my friend that my husband is an adult and smoking is a choice he
makes. He knows enough to decide what is good and not good for him. I
do believe that one of the worst things spouses can do is nag the other
about something.
I think a good marriage is one where a spouse respects the other. One
cannot act like a protective parent in a marriage. If you act like a
protective parent, be prepared to deal with a rebellious teen.
The fact is nobody knows what will happen even in the next one hour. A
few months back my cousin's wife dropped down dead ( a massive cardiac
arrest) at the age of 36, leaving behind two kids who are seven and
five. She neither smoked nor drank.
Another close friend's first cousin went through a similar tragedy. Her
spouse who was 41 dropped down dead on his way to the bathroom. He
neither smoked nor drank and was a pure vegetarian too.
A friend's father who was a chronic smoker lived upto the age of 75. My
maternal grandfather lived upto the age of ninety two or so and he
smoked too.
Yes, I am aware of the dangers of smoking.
I am also aware that life is very unpredictable.
What matters is how you live each day.
Be grateful if you have lived today well. Say a little prayer of thanks
if you have had happy moments of togetherness with loved ones--friends
and family.
And don't try to control your spouse. If it makes them happy, let go! Life IS short!
And be happy yourself too!!
__________________________________________________________________________
If you like my blog, you might enjoy my books :) Grab them here. (You don't need a credit card. You can pay cash on delivery) or if you are an Amazon Fan, you can grab them here
And you can interact with me on my FB page. I almost always reply :)
http://preetishenoy.com/
No comments have been added yet.
