“But in a picture or painting, they’re yours forever.”

68. Listen to the Shadows – Joan Hall Hovey

Katie Summers is an artist who lives in a secluded farm house and occasionally works at a cafe in town. Everyone loves her – the random rich guy she keeps telling they can only be friends, the dishwasher at the cafe with developmental disabilities, the cook at the cafe with anger issues…probably every straight male in close proximity. And she has a gay best friend who is also an artist and they take classes together, so she is covered for best friends with similar interests as well. Oh wait, one guy does not love her – rival artist dude whose name I did not commit to memory because he’s just there to be mean once. He thinks her landscapes are trite, essentially, and that she doesn’t deserve to enter the art contest. Fine.

So, she agrees to go out with the guy she already told they can only be friends because Katie is also a widow, her husband died in the war and wasn’t found, so it’s actually up in the air if he died, but it is assumed he did. She’s trying to give in to Drake, that nice guy (TM), and his dinner date demands and then he stands her up! Her! The most attractive and beloved woman artist who gets to live alone in a secluded house like a boss! And when she’s driving home from this failed date with the guy she didn’t want to go out with, she sees eyes in her rearview mirror like someone is in her backseat and gets into an accident.

This accident is an opportunity for a psychologist at the hospital to fall in love with her. He keeps showing up at her house after she leaves with a lot of pluck and no recollection that taking care of yourself after a giant car accident is in fact hard. He also takes some leave time, so he’s like “you’re my patient, but I have no ethics with you sometimes.”

Anyhoo, the same creepy eyes that she saw in her backseat show up on an effigy in her house which is wearing her husband’s military uniform. Effigies are quite creepy and they hadn’t even had a chance to read that story about Harold the scarecrow in Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark yet either. And this husband-effigy is not the only effigy she encounters in her house. Plus she becomes way less beloved by the town in general once she’s both infirm and suspicious of all the dudes who’ve liked her, except the one who stood her up…gee, I wonder why he’s not suspicious. I think it’s because he’s the most suspicious person ever. Lying about where he purchased the lingerie he got her and everything. Shocking.

I didn’t let Belvedere read Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark either. It’s too scary for guinea pigs and people.

 

Also, a reminder that there is a sale going on on my Threadless page until September 6th! I’ve ordered several things from them, totes, pillows, t-shirts, a puzzle, and been very impressed with the quality. Also, I’m not selling effigies or unethical choices.