SIN? It’s optional. CHANGE Is Possible!
I felt stuck. Trapped. Imprisoned. I told myself that I wanted to change and that I was going to change but yet the weeks, months, years and decades rolled by and I continued to break my vow to God and seek out those lusty images and to pleasure myself.
If you had not been there yourself I don’t think you could understand it. In Romans 7 Paul describes what all of us have experienced. “Sin deceived me. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do–this I keep on doing. When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?”
This was my struggle for decades. What’s strange is that while I promised God and myself that I would not go back to my sin, deep within me experience told me that I was doomed and of course I would slip back into what had become my default mode.
I’ve lost count of the number of people who have lost their temper and exclaimed: “I can’t help it. That’s just the way I am. It’s my personality. It’s in my DNA.”
And over the past 17 years since I began my journey to actually find victory over my habitual sin of pornography I have met hundreds of guys who proclaimed that they too wanted to be free, but inevitably they kept going back and repeating the same shameful actions they wanted to escape. Just yesterday a friend reached out to ask in a support group if his problem with habitual sin was that he had not truly repented.
On the flip side I’m very happy to say I have also met many who were able to put drugs or pornography or any number of habitual sins in the rearview mirror.
What’s the difference? Is change really possible? Yes, of course!
When I was quoting Romans 7 I did not include the final verse, verse 25, which answers the question of WHO will rescue us from sin. “Thanks be to God — through Jesus Christ our Lord!
Jesus is the answer. But you already knew that. The good news is that Jesus has always been, and will always be, ready and willing to help us. Absolutely! Change IS possible! But as we all know, change is not automatic and in most cases does not come quickly or easily.
Sadly while the Bible shows us what to do, so many of us have not followed the Lord’s map to freedom. Today practically all of us can see that while social isolation may be a very effective tool for fighting a virus, for almost everyone to varying degrees, it brings with it emotional and spiritual damage. No wonder the writer of Hebrews said “Do not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another–and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”
In my case I went to church just about every time the doors were open. I preached and taught others. Yet when it came to confessing my sin and asking my brothers for help I was too afraid, embarrassed and ashamed to reveal my secret sin. I failed to follow the Lord’s instructions in James 5: “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
I was never going to find freedom as long as I continued in my double-life and kept my sin in the dark. It was only after I sought help and eventually disclosed my betrayal to my wife that I was able to step out of the darkness and walk in the light.
Change is possible but half measures will never work. Professional athletes know that success requires training and dedication. Rarely will anyone make it very far unless they are “all in”. In Ephesians 5 the Holy Spirit tells us: “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.”
We cannot flirt with sin and flee sin at the same time. “Not even a hint” means zero. As long as I toy with sin and indulge an occasional impure thought I will never come close to leading a holy life. What kind of movies do we watch? What songs play in our minds? What are we looking at on social media? What did Paul tell Timothy? “Flee from youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” We cannot tolerate what’s evil and expect to find peace and a pure heart.
I’m currently reading the book: Hope-Focused Marriage Counseling by Everett L. Worthington Jr. He talks about how all of us need hope. Couples who are contemplating divorce need to know that there is hope for reconciliation and a renewed relationship of love.
So let me say it again. Change is possible! There is hope! Your life can be different! Jesus is with us and will help us! So seek help today. Begin a personal journal. Start actually doing what the Bible says to do and see for yourself how God’s plan really does work. He knows best! Believe it or not God knows more than we do and he created you and me to live a life worth living.
I go into more detail about strategies you can use in my book. Jesus Is Better Than Porn
May the Lord bless you in your journey to a life of freedom as you walk in the LIGHT.
