Simply The Red: a bonus chapter from my book Alternatives To Valium: How Punk Rock Saved A Shy Boy's Life

I am sent to review Simply Red at the Aberdeen Exhibition Centre. This is not glamorous work. The Aberdeen Exhibition Centre is nobody’s idea of a good time. It is a shed, and Simply Red are very popular. Normal people like them. It is a disgrace. I have to stay overnight. I check into a sad hotel by the railway station. I leave my flowery toilet bag and a bar of chocolate in the room. It is my