On mostly writing.

Female hand holding a feather pen. Retro design element. Vintage engraving stylized drawing. Vector illustrationMiracle Maddie

Maddie Girl’s having a lot more good days than she used to. She’s very calm and we’re so thankful. She’s been looking more comfortable lately and at her most recent pulmonologist appointment, the doctor was impressed with her nice, deep breaths and with how clean Mommy’s been keeping her trach and feeding tube! Her acupuncturist, Dr. Murdoc, was commenting on how alert she is and how much better her eyes are since Mexico and her stem cell treatment! AND her chiropractor said we should start trying to ger her to follow commands! Her brain IS healing and she got to enjoy her brother’s concert with her family! Our warrior princess is on a roll.

The epitome of relaxation. On the way to the concert! Maddie’s having good days.

Ireland

I am so conflicted about my time in the Emerald Isle coming to an end. On one hand, I’m excited to go home and see family and friends. On the other hand, I will miss all the friends I have made and the opportunity to solely focus on my writing. Ireland has truly been a once-in-a-lifetime experience and I am eternally grateful.

I had an absolutely perfect Thursday night when I went to The Commercial in Limerick for pints with Joseph, Isabel, Conor, Neil, Sarah Lou, Bob, and Michael. I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time. Nights like Thursday make it impossible to even think about leaving, so I’m already planning on coming back for graduation.

Writing

I’ve been getting A LOT of writing done lately. I’m not sure if it’s because the deadlines seem to be closer together this semester or if it’s because I’m really finding my groove. I’m inclined to think it’s the latter. I mean, I’ve been writing poetry and that’s not really me … unless it’s magnetic.

And I’ve been receiving really positive feedback about my writing. Max, a PhD student, gave me some great feedback as did some of my course mates. Caoimhe really understood what I was going for with my latest scene and it made me so happy. Mom said my latest scene was “very good, it definitely kept my attention!”

I’m going to share the poems I wrote during the poetry lectures here.

Poem #1

Twinkling diamonds in a black velvet blanket
Neck craned upwards, close to breaking
Breath releasing in icy white puffs
The infinite can be so cold
Reaching for Dad’s hand to come back to Earth
to be grounded, safety in touch
The opposite of solitary floating in endless space
It’s overwhelming, takes the breath from your lungs
In a place where there’s no oxygen anyway
Too young for irony
There’s no noise either

Poem #2

Constellations memorized
Orbital eye pressed against the telescope
White lab coat hanging off my frame
Just past my knees, my artist’s smock
As I try to classify what I’ll never touch
What is always expanding
The enormity should paralyze me
But the challenge excites me
A tiny god determining which part of the heavens
I’ll share, I’ll name
Because to name a thing is to own it

Poem #3

I remember him
buttoning and unbuttoning
the cuff of my sleeve with
my arm stretched towards him
across the table

I remember him
sloppily smashing his lips
against my cheek
in the crowded, noisy bar
with his drunken, hazy eyes

I remember him
knocking on my hotel room door
in the dead of night
twirling playing cards in his hand
Smirking

I remember him
like that
so I don’t have to
remember him
as a liar

or as the worst thing
that ever happened to me

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