guardrails

For the past two weeks, I haven’t maintained my To Do list. I finished one notebook and started another; I transferred my check roster but not the list I depend on to keep me on task. The result? Two weeks of drifting from day to day, relying on my routine instead of obsessing over all the items that need my attention. Most things still got done—I didn’t miss a virtual school visit or meeting—but I also just made room for the things I wanted to do. I went to see August Wilson’s Gem of the Ocean and sat in a packed theater for the first time in years. I went to the cinema for a matinee and saw Death on the Nile with no one else around. I met friends for brunch and took my mask off to eat in a restaurant for the first time this year. I haven’t been writing, which hasn’t been good for my mood, but the article I wrote last month was published over at Mom.com and my op-ed about the book ban attempts in VA will come out on Monday. The weather has been mild so I’ve been able to run outside; I’ve been baking banana bread to curb my craving for sweets. This weekend I spent way too much time shopping online (a sofa, a rug, a chair, a footstool, and a cushion) but I’m hoping that these new furnishings will inspire me to finish up the many little tasks around the apartment that I’ve put off since last year. I took new headshots; after months of rejection, I found a new agent and met with her yesterday to learn the details of Random House’s opening offer for the final book in the dragon series. After a very long, very full Black History Month, I met with the woman who will be directing the staged reading of Say Her Name. We’re assembling a cast and hope to hold the reading by the end of March. It will be my first time hearing the play aloud since I wrote it in 2020; if I’m not impressed, I’ll leave theater alone for a while and try my hand at puppetry! There’s a fellowship for emerging Black puppeteers and I’m going to apply even though I don’t think I have much of a chance (having no experience whatsoever, just a love of puppets). I’ve talked with three of my Black women kid lit friends about making short films with dolls so that’s something I can build upon; I have my novel that’s loosely based on the Dogon people’s inheritance of astronomical knowledge from aliens. My new editor wants a quick turnaround on edits for the fourth dragon book and I’m not going to complain because I booked my first vacation in ages and don’t want to have that hanging over my head. I might even try leaving my laptop at home so I’m not tempted to do any work! Moonwalking comes out next month and we’ve started making plans for the virtual launch; at the end of the novel, Pierre heads to San Juan so I figured I should do the same. So not having a To Do list has and has not slowed me down. I made a new list this morning and will see if I feel more focused and/or productive for the rest of this month. Spring is coming—we’re nearing 70 this weekend!—but I stayed inside today. I hope the new season helps me shake off the lethargy that lingers after months (years?) of hibernation. Bears leave their dens scrawny and hungry and let their instinct guide them. It helps to have a list but it’s good to know I can manage without one and not go off the rails…