My year to date...plus a little
It’s time to say goodbye to another year.
At this time last year, I think most of us were begging for 2021 to better. On top of COVID, and everything it had brought with it, the country was overwhelmed with BLM rallies, mask protests and political demonstrations. I’m sure there are many different words that can be substituted for the nouns I used but, whatever the term, 2020 seemed like a world upside-down.
For me, I was still reeling from my dad passing at the end of 2019. I moved back to Fort Collins from Denver to live with my boyfriend and I had put my PhD dissertation on an indefinite hold. Two days before COVID shutdown our world, I had received my student teaching license. To kill two birds with one stone, I was going to use whatever school county I started teaching at for my dissertation test subject. Obviously, that didn’t work out. So, my boyfriend and I picked up golf and he encouraged me to follow my lifelong dream of becoming an author. When he was at the driving range, I would sit in the grass and write. Colorado was on fire and the skies were thick with smoke, but I could write anywhere. During NANOWRIMO, which is November, I completed my first fantasy novel. And, I left it in a file on my computer.
Twelve months ago, I was in the same boat as most other people, wondering what 2021 would bring and how it would better my life. The first couple months of 2021 didn’t seem different than the last ones of 2020. I felt like I was waiting for Biden to pronounce something huge and dramatic, “The world is normal again. Resume your life.” Then, I remembered that I need to make the changes that I want to see in my life.
Remember that book I finally wrote in 2020? So did I! It was scary, and I was more nervous than when I stepped on stage at Sea World for a dance competition, but I told the world about my book. My small world, at least. I paid for ads on every social media platform and boosted my posts. I paid for a writer’s conference, an editor, book covers, book reviewers, and the list goes on. I paid to learn what not to do, the hard way of course.
In this last year of 2021, I had ups and downs. I worked my butt off to publish and market my first book, then I worked it off even more to write and publish the second book while working full time. I lost a great friend in April, such a bright light. I was fully vaccinated in May and I came down with COVID mid-August. My sense of taste and smell was gone for about ten days and I was using an inhaler to help a terrible cough I had for 21 days (yes, I was counting because it was driving me crazy). After testing negative, I flew out to see my Gram in the end of September. It was the last time I would see her, and I am so glad my long-last cousin convinced me to go. My cousins even got me on a boat at 6 am with a storm on land and a hurricane off the coast to go deep-sea fishing!
When I returned home, I had a mole checked and biopsied. After a short seven days, the doctor called and said it was melanoma. Shit, right? I made my appointment for them to remove the spot. Gram died five days before her 90th birthday. Five days after Gram’s birthday, I went back to the doctor to be told that the melanoma was worse than they had originally told me. Instead of a cute 3-4 stitches, I was given 6 internal and 14 external stitches, giving me a 2 ¼ inch line across my abdomen. Well, I hope it will be a little line. The stitches will be removed January 5th and I will go in every 3 months to get checked. Somewhat ironically, I have a concerning mole that is growing in an outward spiral on the first ‘d’ of my Biblical tattoo, “And to his miracles there is no end”.
You know what, though? It’s true. There is no end to his miracles. If I hadn’t been vaccinated, then I may have ended up on a ventilator instead of an inhaler. If I hadn’t listened to my mother and had my mole checked, just in case because I have family members who have had melanoma, then I could have been in a worse situation. A scar is much better than chemo or radiation.
Tomorrow will be a new year: 2022! I haven’t jumped on the bandwagon, yet, of making resolutions or bucketlists, but I’m sure I will soon. The few things that I do see for the first quarter of this next chapter are buying a new house, getting back on track with my workout routine – biopsies and stitches to the abdomen have kept me from doing much :( - and completing the next two installments of my fantasy series.
I wish you happy reflection and urge you to take an hour, at least, to think of what you would like to happen for yourself next year. Can you take just one step towards that dream of yours? I’m not saying be reckless, but be bold and daring! Make your vision board then your SMART board. Whatever you decide to do, have a little ‘me time’ and have FUN!
Lastly…
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!— Hayley Rae —
