Unanswered

I have enjoyed my singlehood, where I make decisions for my palette. I have seen couples split between risotto and spaghetti. I love the way I have controlled my life. During this pandemic, I have realized the importance of a life partner. I am not desperate to get married to any random person. However, now I want to settle in life. I want to come home to a person rather than to my books. Last week, I watched the movie ‘Love Hard’ as discussed in my previous blog. While watching the movie, I realized I am that writer featuring in that movie. In today’s world, you will come across people devoid of emotions. Sometimes, we experience a lack of emotions from our friends. I want to be around people who make me forget my social media glamour for that moment. I cannot be at a dinner table where Instagram is far important than friends.
To kill boredom in life, you need a life partner. I am writing my anxious behavior through my words. I am frustrated with the amount of crappy attitude my parents have to bear every day. I wish in some part of the world someone reading this would relate to my feelings. I want to ask hundreds of questions about love if anyone wants to answer it. I fell in love and fell out of it. I punished myself for falling in love for uncountable years. Sometimes, I come across the social media posts of my ex-boyfriend. I don’t want to be with him, but I want to be somewhere he challenged me. I keep recalling the day I stumbled upon my ex, along with his wife. There was a time when I was possessive about him. I could see his wife possessive while I danced around with my friends. It took me a decade to forget my past and work on myself. But when I look at my singlehood, the words of my ex keep ringing in my ears. Trust me; those words weren’t a pleasant exchange between us. Sometimes I think I should have focused on grooming myself rather than building my career. In the current arranged marriage scenario, everyone looks upon you like trash. Anyone settling for an arranged marriage is the rejected clothing line at Sarojini. I have blurted out random thoughts popping into my mind today. Maybe the end of the tunnel would hold the light or would take down to the dark hole.