ilsa-fireswan: jordisstigander: literalshittaker: jordi...

jordisstigander:

literalshittaker:

jordisstigander:

teal-deer:

Y'ever think about what absolute mad decadence we live in that “vanilla” means “plain”

Anytime someone says ‘it’s just vanilla ice cream’ I have to restrain myself from saying, “ah yes, the flavor produced by the seeds of a tropical orchid, a flower which blossoms for a single day before dying, the second most expense spice in the world. Just that.”

Historically, the spices I have in my cabinet are an embarrassment of riches. I have there a large container of whole black peppercorns which I grate fresh over my food. Multiple containers of cinnamon because I forgot I already had some. Ginger, cardamom, red pepper flakes, whole cloves and ground, nutmeg and turmeric. Kings and emperors have not eaten food so well spiced.

I have vanilla ice cream in my freezer (cold! frozen! when the rich would pay fortunes to send for ice from mountains to chill fruit in the summers). I am going to put on my silk robe, fix myself a bowl, and feast.

Fellas… there’s a reason it’s so ubiquitous when it’s so 'rare.’ 'Vanilla extract’ is derived from beavers. It’s bonkers, but that explains why everything can be 'vanilla’ and cheap. Try buying vanilla bean, that is where you’ll see the price actually reflects the scarcity.

Putting on your silk robe and eating your beaver gland flavored icecream, yup that’s decadence for you.

emperorkitten

@literalshittaker i am baffled that there are still people that believe this. In what world are beavers in such abundance that they’re glands are cheaper than vanilla? Yes, the gland smells vaguely like vanilla. It was used briefly as a perfume and to enhance the flavor of real vanilla. But almost no one even does that anymore because it’s too expensive. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/castoreum/

Oh my gosh you guys

I have been on this website since February 2015, and I have witnessed a lot of shamings and misunderstandings, and part of me always wondered if it would happen to me and why. I never imagined it would be because someone would get snooty about me taking joy in something tiny, specifically putting on the recycled silk robe I got on clearance and eating cheap ice cream at 10 pm.

Like yeah, I know there are a lot of additives to most vanilla, but they’re mostly derived from other plants and trees. (I actually spent a stupid amount of time researching this post!) That doesn’t change the fact that vanilla is a flavoring that has only been widely available for less than two hundred years.

Writing that post was an actual pleasure because it gave me a chance to reflect on a few of the blessings of the modern world and not think about low paying jobs and health care and the fact that the ocean is on fire. So while part of me is laughing at the fact that someone was indignant and misinformed, there’s also the fact that someone saw my joy and decided to take a dump on it and it’s making me weirdly emotional.

I went to the notes because I got so excited about “plain” flavors. Like. Do you Know?!? Can you Get It?!? The whole idea that I have access to So Many pure flavors and that I have the option to PREFER a single flavor food.

Vanilla ice cream! Pistachio ice cream! Strawberry ice cream!

My meat doesn’t have to be salted or smoked!

My potatoes can be thrown out if they start to sprout!

I have eight different kinds of sugar in my pantry right now!

If I take a notion to try a new spice from the other side of the planet, I can just order it at some Global Shopping Website and have it in my hands in two days or less!

Amazing!

I can have enough strawberries in my fridge that sometimes I forget to eat them!!! Can you picture it? Have you ever grown strawberries? Have you seen some Medieval-esque movie where the Queen takes a bite of a single perfect strawberry and the camera just… lingers? THATS IT! That’s the experience when you have them in your garden. You won’t grow enough in your patio garden to top waffles for the whole family. You won’t grow enough to eat some and also make strawberry jam. Strawberries are decadence and a luxury!

Asparagus! I can go to the grocery store and buy enough to serve it as an entree if I want to! Again, have you grown asparagus? I almost bought a house I couldn’t afford because the seller had put in about half an acre of asparagus. It was mature! I could have harvested enough to cook with a family meal! For two weeks in the year I could have had fresh asparagus! I still have fantasies about that asparagus!

Mangos and almonds! Cherries and ginger! Mint and cocoa! Vanilla and durian! Rice AND wheat AND millet AND corn! All in the same kitchen at the same time!

Embarrassment of riches. I love that phrase. I try to keep my absolute wealth - both in a historical and in a modern global context - in mind every time I work in my kitchen. There are people in the world right now who don’t have the concept of a recipe because they don’t have the concept of choosing what you eat. There are people in history who don’t have the concept of mocking “plain vanilla” because it’s amazing and awesome and brilliant that it even made it to our kitchens.

Thank you for reminding me. Thank you for helping me be thankful. Be joyous! Be mindful! Be happy in the world!