I received this poem as a gift

In exchange for a couple of houseplants, a friend gave me this poem, drawn from real life.

Fartin’ ‘n Gold Pants at the Dollar Tree

by Michael Ryan Chandler

Is it a frog?Did someone step on a duck?Did someone pop a lunch sack?Fartin’ ‘n gold pants at the Dollar Tree.Did a sewer line back up?Did someone forget to wash?Did a mouse die under the cans?Fartin’ ‘n gold pants at the Dollar Tree.Was it a burrito you ate?Was it bad broccoli?Was it a sandwich full of hate?Fartin’ ‘n gold pants at the Dollar Tree.I’m sympathetic to folks with gastritiswith pants touched by Midas.But a mighty gastritis done got hold’a you.I guess I should’a known.I was feeling so alone,all alone in an empty old storewhen from across the way what did I hear?It sounded like a flock of geese.It sounded like the end of the world.At first I was confused.At first I felt fear.Then I saw your gold rumpshakin’ and quakin’calling out.People say express yourselfand I believe that to be true,but honey, please find another way.Maybe change your diet.Maybe go to France.I heard they don’t fart there.Whatever you dowhen you’re at the Dollar Treeplease don’t fart in gold pants.