One Way to Break the Cycle of a Bad Day

When the challenges of life get us going, we can take back the reins of our day and say, "Whoa!" We can put the brakes on our bad mood and we can stop ourselves before we go nuts and punch our computer.

Rarely are my frustrations with people. It is the tech stuff that gets me whirring, and not in a revved up good way. It's more like "Why can't I figure out how to do this?! Why does this take so long? Where did that go and how can I find it again?!"

I hire out much of my techie needs these days, and yet, there is always something I think I should do myself. I converted to Apple and am told the Mac is very intuitive. People said it would change my life. Maybe I need to watch the tutorials instead of diving right in, but so far it cannot read my mind at all.

When you get frustrated during the course of a normal day, there are ways to turn the tide. (FYI, flipping off the computer (or a person) doesn't help a darn thing.)

Instead, crank the soundtrack in your head. When my tech trek gets me frustrated, I hear The Knack singing "Frustrated." They certainly weren't singing about computers, but music really does soothe the savage beast.

When you feel your buttons being pushed, just walk away. (Yep, singing Kelly Clarkson, hey hey hey, just walk away.) I'm the one-line wonder. Most songs aren't applicable, but a phrase or two can express nicely.

Your life is a musical. When irritations pop up, you may not burst out into song, but in your head, you can. Picture your boss jumping up on the desk, belting out a blues tune. When you're stuck in traffic, imagine everyone leaping out onto the top of their cars in a united flash mob. When your honey done you wrong, visualize a Broadway musical apology production number.

Does this song-and-dance in your head change the situation? No. It changes you. You get your perspective back.

Often when we have a frustrating moment, we let it lead to another frustrating moment to another and another. We go down crabby road. Instead, we can break the cycle. We can get back to the here and now, and tackle the situation from a centered calm.

Usually, for me, it means I take a break from my desk. I may even You Tube a video of The Knack. Guys from the 80s in white shirts and skinny ties make me smile. When I return to the project, a cooler head prevails, or I wait until tomorrow when my energy level is back to normal. Or even better, I hand it off to a techie.

The point is I get myself back to a place where I can make rational decisions instead of being caught up in a spiral of tension and negativity. I let the air out, and exhale. No matter what frustration you experience, even a tense face to face exchange with a co-worker or family member, a pause and an exhale make a world of difference.

Do it right now. Exhale. Long. Loud. Slow. Again. Feel any different? (Did you start to hear Whitney Houston in your head? "You'll find a point when you will exhale. Shoop Shoop Shoop. All you gotta say is shoo be doop.")

When you have a stressful moment, you can nip it in the bud. A simple technique like thinking of a line from a song, or deep slow breathing, can shift you internally. Your brain is an amazing tool. It creates a chemical reaction which calms your body and creates a positive emotion. More positive emotions, more feel good chemicals, hand in hand they go, lifting you up out of your frustration and back to a healthier perspective.

Instead of going down the chain reaction of one frustration leading to a "bad day," turn it around. Let the chain reaction take you on the upward spiral. One song can do it. Chain, chain, chain….. (Aretha, sing it with me. "Chain, chain, chain, a chain of fools…..")