The Fiver | Real Madrid are coming to Barcelona and Lionel Messi isn’t coming back

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It was a mixed bag in Europe last night for some of the Premier League’s top striking talent. Cristiano Ronaldo scored a goal that either began a new era of Big Cup glory at Old Trafford or condemned Manchester United to another season of grinding mediocrity, depending on where you’re coming from with the old Ole thing. Romelu Lukaku and Timo Werner both picked up cases of knack that will see them miss Unconvincing 2021-22 Premier League Champions Chelsea’s next few dull one-goal victories against mid-table opposition they really should be whipping with panache. Meanwhile in Big Vase, Patson Daka notched his first European goal for Leicester and then, a mere 33 minutes and three more goals later, became the Foxes’ joint-leading scorer in continental football of all time, ever. Easy as that! And there you are, thinking Ronaldo is a force of nature.

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