I Miss Good Conversations, But I Probably Shouldn't
Beyond members of my family, I rarely - if ever - have good conversations with people anymore. Though I spend the bulk of my working days speaking to people, I can't recall the last time anyone said anything remotely interesting to me. Granted, work is seldom a venue conducive to substantive discussions, but I must mention that I work at not one, but two universities in two different countries. You would think at least one of these places would house at least one individual capable of facilitating a riveting exchange of observations and ideas.
Don't misunderstand. I never expected to find intriguing conversationalists at our contemporary citadels of darkness, but I've noticed that even the small talk among over-educated academics barely rises above apathetic weariness. The innately loquacious among them - who are dwindling by the day - have resorted to regurgitation. Listening to them is akin to hearing a fatigued anchorperson monotonously drone through the previous evening's news headlines without saying a word about the news itself.
It doesn't get any better outside of work. My neighbors tend to stick to the weather or sporting events. The few friends I do have here limit themselves to complaining about work. Talking to the priest at the village church is like talking to one of the church walls.
I sometimes think the fault lies within me. In terms of conversation, perhaps I am attracting exactly what I deserve. Or, perhaps I am drawing precisely what I am projecting. Yet I cannot ignore the attempts I have made to elevate a conversation above the usual topics of sun and rain and taxes and bosses. Unfortunately, the individuals with whom I try to kindle engagement have no trouble ignoring my attempts. They douse the sparks immediately and ensure their tinder remains non-flammable.
I wonder if others are experiencing the same phenomenon.
Whatever the case, I have decided not to let it bother me anymore. If I can't find a good conversation beyond the boundaries of my family, it very likely means I need to be content with the good conversations I do have with my family. It also a forceful reminder that the conversations I seek might not exist in the external human world for the time being, but exist instead in good books, in the Gospels, in the Holy Spirit.
In Jesus Himself.
Don't misunderstand. I never expected to find intriguing conversationalists at our contemporary citadels of darkness, but I've noticed that even the small talk among over-educated academics barely rises above apathetic weariness. The innately loquacious among them - who are dwindling by the day - have resorted to regurgitation. Listening to them is akin to hearing a fatigued anchorperson monotonously drone through the previous evening's news headlines without saying a word about the news itself.
It doesn't get any better outside of work. My neighbors tend to stick to the weather or sporting events. The few friends I do have here limit themselves to complaining about work. Talking to the priest at the village church is like talking to one of the church walls.
I sometimes think the fault lies within me. In terms of conversation, perhaps I am attracting exactly what I deserve. Or, perhaps I am drawing precisely what I am projecting. Yet I cannot ignore the attempts I have made to elevate a conversation above the usual topics of sun and rain and taxes and bosses. Unfortunately, the individuals with whom I try to kindle engagement have no trouble ignoring my attempts. They douse the sparks immediately and ensure their tinder remains non-flammable.
I wonder if others are experiencing the same phenomenon.
Whatever the case, I have decided not to let it bother me anymore. If I can't find a good conversation beyond the boundaries of my family, it very likely means I need to be content with the good conversations I do have with my family. It also a forceful reminder that the conversations I seek might not exist in the external human world for the time being, but exist instead in good books, in the Gospels, in the Holy Spirit.
In Jesus Himself.
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