What Self-Publishing Taught Me
When I released my first self-published novel through Amazon’s CreateSpace (now defunct) and Kindle Direct in 2015, I was over the moon. I’d written a novel I was proud of, I’d edited it to satisfaction, I’d designed the book layout and cover. I was in control of every aspect of the publishing process, and that was exactly how I wanted it. I didn’t even consider querying agents because I really didn’t believe there was any way I would ever be published the traditional way without an “in”, and I wanted so badly for Do Not Resuscitate to be out there in the world.
That also meant I had to do my own marketing and my own publicity. I entered several independent publishing contests and actually won a few. I got reviews. And I managed to sell some books. All at a cost of about $5000 to me. Every sale helped me recoup some of those costs, and to this day—six years after publication—I still sell between one and ten copies of the novel a month. I’ve actually legitimately sold just under 1000 copies of my books (this number includes my other self-published works as well). Amazing. Plus, I’ve distributed another 9,500 Kindle copies to readers for free (as promotions). So people have actually read things I’ve written!
So when I snagged an agent for my most recent book, Kind of Brave, in August 2020, I started beating myself up, thinking I should have actually tried to publish Do Not Resuscitate through traditional means. If I could score an agent now, maybe I could have found an agent for DNR in 2015. I had self-publishing regrets.
But a year later, King of Brave is still languishing in publishing limbo—no editors have signed on to the book yet. Meanwhile, Do Not Resuscitate is having a revival as a newly released audiobook. So which is better—to have a shot at traditional publishing with zero guarantees or to have a book self-published, destined to have a tiny audience and never to make any money?
Well, they’re both fine really. What I learned from self-publishing, I use to this day with every new project I start. I learned to trust my voice; some people will respond to it (some won’t). I learned to be patient; people will eventually read what I’ve written (at least a few people). And I’ve learned that money and fame are not the endgame; it’s about getting a message out there and hearing from the readers who respond well to that message.
I’ve also learned that the traditional route is grueling and painful. King of Brave may end up getting self-published if it never sells, and that’s okay.
I can’t say I have no regrets. But I can say that I’ve learned to trust myself and to savor the tiny victories, because in the publishing world, it’s only ever likely to be a series of tiny victories. Not many authors will have the same success as J.K. Rowling. Even fewer will be satisfied by that success. So find contentment in the small ways your writing touches others, and trust your voice.
