How Do I Deal with Procrastination? Let Me Count the Ways I Procrastinate AND Push Through

Do you experience that inner yelp of resistance each time you sit down to write? What about when you wrap up a big, huge submission for a big, huge contest? My inner saboteur has this shit down to a science. After years of observing my writing patterns, I know what my saboteur is and when it will arise.

I’ll sit down to submit something. BAM – an hour later, my house has never been cleaner. My laundry's done. I’ve managed to text every friend I’ve made since the Obama administration. Still, the application, the fellowship, or the submission has magically gone untouched.

I’m BRILLIANT at blocking my creativity and projects, especially if I don’t have to be accountable. No matter, we can devise ways to understand and work with the demons of procrastination.

Here’s how I handle writerly self-sabotage:

1) Know thyself

Your saboteur isn’t that creative. After a while, it will exhaust itself and revert to the same strategies. As I’ve told you, my procrastination usually creeps up in the form of pressing to-do items. There’s mold on that patio chair? Clean it up. Did someone text? How are they doing? My desk is dirty; give it a wipe-down.

Two hours later, I’m scrubbing away.

What forms does your saboteur take? Become acquainted with and befriend those tendencies. I even made a joke out of my self-sabotage. For instance, in the middle of an NEA application (if you’ve ever filled one out, you’ll understand), I began texting a friend. Mid-text, I stopped and said, “You know, this is what I do when I want to fuck myself over.” She texted back, “I won’t enable you,” with a heart emoji and a GIF of a tumbleweed.

2) Say WHEN

 Whenever I draw close to finishing a hefty project, I’ll devise a billion side-projects. I’ll fixate on minute details. Oh, and this is a BIG ONE – just when I get to the part of an application where I have to ask for recommenders, I shut the fuck down.

Two hours later, I’ll look up and my reflection is gleaming back at me from a newly polished mirror. Now, whenever that moment happens, I tell myself, “This behavior is normal; this is what happens. You’re feeling REALLY uncomfortable, but that isn’t the worst thing. People endure bigger struggles every day.”

Then, I take a deep breath while my inner saboteur yelps in resistance. And before I can think too much, I hit “send.”

3) Confront the ego

When you think of the ego, do you usually think of an overinflated sense of self? Me, too. The ego, however, has another big job to do, and not an entirely useless one.

Your ego’s job is to keep you alive. One of the ways it keeps you safe is by pressing the panic button any time you push out of your comfort zone. So, when you sit down to submit to a competitive journal, your ego screams, “ABORT, ABORT, ABORT!” Why?

The possibility of success registers as unfamiliar and threatening. All your poor little ego knows is to keep you fed, safe, and sheltered. And it’s going to fuck with you until the bitter end to keep you safe.

Pay attention to that feeling; it’s a subtle one. For example, when I sat down to write and feel that subterranean impulse to run, then the strange comfort at the idea of surrendering to the fear, one day, my inner prize-fighter kicked in.

I told myself, “Hey, I know that your intentions are good, and you’re trying to keep me safe, but I know better. And I’m following through.”

That said, this self-talk is easier said than done. Talking back to your ego can be one of the most excruciatingly painful things you ever do. You’re working against your basic human survival impulses, which is a motherfucker. Although this battle never gets easier; it becomes familiar.

4) Soften the Saboteur

Although I still struggle, one of the most effective ways to tame my ego is to soften it. The way I see it, the ego is rooted in fear. Therefore, if you can focus on the positive outcomes of either the situation at hand or anything promising in your life, you can stave back self-destruction and eliminate the fear.

For example, I’m procrastinating right now as we speak.

Even as I type this blog, my chest is locking up. A little voice inside me is saying, “Why the fuck are you writing this post? Who gives a damn? Who will listen?”

But even so, I focus on the positive outcomes. I say to myself and you:

“Look, I know you’re scared but that’s because this feeling is unfamiliar. You’re still new to marketing yourself and your work. Here’s the deal, though: once you get through this [fellowship application, blog post, submission], think about all the wonderful outcomes. You’re creating AWARENESS of what you do.

You’re staying on people’s radars. You’re lingering in other people’s consciousness, even if they DO think this is the dumbest fucking blog post they’ve ever read. Don’t you want to be relevant? Don’t you WANT to be heard? Don’t you want to remain at the forefront of publishers’ consciousness? Well, get it done!”

So, what are you waiting for?